Dating as a Christian

As a Christian from NYC it’s so hard to find other people with strong Christian values from here. Especially when it comes to committing sins of lust. Sex until marriage is considered so unusual to most people where I’m from. Does anyone else relate to this??

As a Christian from NYC it’s so hard to find other people with strong Christian values from here. Especially when it comes to committing sins of lust. Sex until marriage is considered so unusual to most people where I’m from. Does anyone else relate to this??

I am not in your age bracket, but, yes, I can totally relate to what you said.

Keep yourself pure...regardless of what others do.

If you are desiring a potential mate, then start praying now that God will bring a godly man to you. Whatever you do, do not compromise your holiness because of the sinfulness in others.

This is actually a pretty common complaint. With the issue of sex also being the main problem seen. So what you're dealing with seems to be the norm, actually.

As a Christian from NYC it’s so hard to find other people with strong Christian values from here. Especially when it comes to committing sins of lust. Sex until marriage is considered so unusual to most people where I’m from. Does anyone else relate to this??

of course. it took me 3 years & 49 weeks to find a Christian gal! it's a universal issue!

Amen❤️ I myself found it hard to resist sexual temptation due to my past relationship with sex but I’m trying to heal that now. I’m no longer dating but just praying for a man of God to come into my life whenever I’m ready

God bless you two ❤️❤️ I can’t wait for the day I get to find a man of God

When it comes to resisting any type of temptation, we need the power of the Holy Spirit to enable us to do the same. Maybe we can have a discussion along those lines sometime if you think that it might be beneficial to you.

wow!!! i'm still not used to being complimented or noticed. people just don't do that around here. thank you so much aeriss009. my wife & i will pray for you. may your day be filled with the joy of Jesus!

Of course brother🥹 thank you so much

we were raised with this treatment: "can't you do anything right", "what's wrong with you", "you stupid jerk", 'you...."(swear words). & beaten terribly, almost all the time! all the neighbors heard us getting beat in the summertime when everyone's windows are open. thankfully & blessedly i became a born again Christian in 1993 & the 1st item God planted in my head was forgiveness. i mean He really laid it on me. & it was easy to forgive my parents. i couldn't even believe it. YEAH!!! no more bad dreams, negative conjurings & bad memories! PRAISE THE LORD JESUS!!!!

Amennn❤️🙏🏻 you are so right about practicing forgiveness. It really is the way. I stopped living in resentment and I never felt as much peace as I have now. Thank you for sharing, I come from a similar situation. I thank God for strength and the power to be forgiving 🥹🥹

This is actually a pretty common complaint. With the issue of sex also being the main problem seen. So what you're dealing with seems to be the norm, actually.

I've come up with the term "You can't microwave true love" ! or don't order off the dinner menu if it's breakfast. Ultimately I want to be with someone that has my same values, that is to wait until marriage to have sexual relations. If the person doesn't want to do that you are dating, they are not the right person.

Also, I've come up with a way to evaluate if someone is boyfriend or husband material, I call it their Relationship Resume. When they tell you, if they do, about their past relationships...in your mind or write down when you get home....their relationship history. For instance, I met a nice man who claimed to be a Christian for lunch yesterday. He was a gentleman and seemed decent. He never mentioned or talked about the Lord Jesus. You might assume if Jesus is your best friend, you probably would have something to say about Him or what He's doing in your life lately. About the Relationship Resume, this nice man I had lunch with, was married to 10 years, now divorced. (wife cheated on him multiple times). They he has had a series of girlfriends that have lived with him and they all cheated on him. Notice a pattern? Anyone have any thoughts?
Then, he said he wants the money to be 50/50. This is not the Biblical model for marriage. Think of Boaz and Ruth. Anyone have any thoughts on this one?
Thank you and God Bless everyone.

That sounds great, yes. It’s one of the things I try to work on the most

Hi, aeriss009.

Please consider the following:

John 14:16

"And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you forever;"

John 14:26

"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you."

John 15:26

"But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father, he shall testify of me:"

John 16:7

"Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you."

In these verses, Jesus referred to "the Holy Ghost," or to "the Spirit of truth," as "the Comforter."

The New Testament was originally written in Greek, and the word that was translated into English as "Comforter" is paraklētos, and it means someone who is called to one's side in order to assist them.

https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g3875/kjv/tr/0-1/

Outline of Biblical Usage

1. summoned, called to one's side, esp. called to one's aid

A. one who pleads another's cause before a judge, a pleader, counsel for defense, legal assistant, an advocate

B. one who pleads another's cause with one, an intercessor

i. of Christ in his exaltation at God's right hand, pleading with God the Father for the pardon of our sins

C. in the widest sense, a helper, succourer, aider, assistant

i. of the Holy Spirit destined to take the place of Christ with the apostles (after his ascension to the Father), to lead them to a deeper knowledge of the gospel truth, and give them divine strength needed to enable them to undergo trials and persecutions on behalf of the divine kingdom

In fact, other Bible translations translate paraklētos from Greek into English as "advocate," "helper," or "counselor."

For example, here is how the Greek word paraklētos is translated into English in other Bible versions in John 14:16.

https://biblehub.com/john/14-16.htm

New International Version
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—

New Living Translation
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you.

English Standard Version
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever,

Berean Standard Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be with you forever—

Berean Literal Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you to the age--

King James Bible
And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you forever;

New King James Version
And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—

New American Standard Bible
I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, so that He may be with you forever;

NASB 1995
“I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever;

NASB 1977
“And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever;

Legacy Standard Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate, that He may be with you forever;

Amplified Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), to be with you forever—

Christian Standard Bible
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever.

Holman Christian Standard Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever.

American Standard Version
And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may be with you forever,

Aramaic Bible in Plain English
“And I shall request from my Father and he will give you another Redeemer of the accursed, that he will be with you for eternity.”

Contemporary English Version
Then I will ask the Father to send you the Holy Spirit who will help you and always be with you.

Douay-Rheims Bible
And I will ask the Father, and he shall give you another Paraclete, that he may abide with you forever.

English Revised Version
And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may be with you forever,

GOD'S WORD® Translation
I will ask the Father, and he will give you another helper who will be with you forever.

Good News Translation
I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, who will stay with you forever.

International Standard Version
I will ask the Father to give you another Helper, to be with you always.

Literal Standard Version
and I will ask the Father, and He will give to you another Comforter, that He may remain with you throughout the age:

Majority Standard Bible
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to abide with you forever—

New American Bible
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate to be with you always,

NET Bible
Then I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate to be with you forever--

New Revised Standard Version
And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever.

New Heart English Bible
I will pray to the Father, and he will give you another Helper, that he may be with you forever,--

Webster's Bible Translation
And I will pray the Father, and he will give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever;

Weymouth New Testament
And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be forever with you--the Spirit of truth.

World English Bible
I will pray to the Father, and he will give you another Counselor, that he may be with you forever:

Young's Literal Translation
and I will ask the Father, and another Comforter He will give to you, that he may remain with you -- to the age;

The reason why I believe that the proper understanding of this word's actual meaning might greatly assist you is because God has not left you "comfortless," or without an "advocate," or without a "helper," or without a "counselor" in your quest to overcome temptation, and in your quest for truth. In other words, God never intended for any of us as Christians to rely solely upon our own willpower, or our own human intellect, or our own memory retention skills in order to overcome in this life. Instead, he has always fully intended for us to rely upon the Holy Ghost or the Holy Spirit to empower us to be holy, to teach us all things, and to bring all things back to our remembrances in time of need. Divine help is available in your Christian life, at your asking, and it is available through the Holy Spirit who now dwells inside of you as a Christian.

Do you understand what I am saying?

If you do, then you need to learn to rely upon and trust in the never-failing strength and wisdom of the Holy Spirit, and you will be victorious over the power of sin in this life. He is our source of overcoming power, and he is the one who not only inspired the writing of the scriptures, but also the one who knows exactly what they mean, and he is available to you as your "comforter," or "advocate," or "helper," or counselor" 24 hours a day, and 7 days a week.

If you would like to learn a bit more about how to put your trust in him, then we can discuss that further.