Can We All Find our Soulmate Somewhere In Between Dodging Zombies at Halloween and Fruitcake at Christmas?

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Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,677
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I forget that your name kinda means you ARE looking for someone.
HA! Nope. Better if you do forget it.

I mean it's still possible she might find somebody, but not because she's looking.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
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I chose the name Seoulsearch because Seoul was my origin city (where I was adopted from,) and I've always felt I was on a lifelong search for who I am. I am always in between -- for example, being Asian raised among Caucasians. I'm never seen as a full member of either side of course, so I started out asking God, "Who am I?" from the time I could form words. And I feel that one of my callings is to help other people I meet along the way to help them find who they are as well.

So no, the name isn't implying that I'm necessarily looking for someone, though I'd be open to it if that's what God wants, and I could see how it could be interpreted as that.

Like any other area of life, adoption seems to be a very unique experience and outlook. I've met a lot of adoptees whose lives and opinions are very different than mine.



When I was married, I thought I might have 2 children by birth and 2 by adoption, but that didn't work out. I heard my ex didn't marry the girl he left me for, he married someone else, and apparently they had kids. I used to ask God why he was able to have a family but not me, but I've become more accepting of how life has turned out.

I've written several times on this forum about a relationship I once had in which I was basically a single parent to the children of an alcoholic, and that seems to be the parental role God once had for me. After all was said and done, his alcoholism took over and he lost his kids to another relative (the mother had passed away.)

I'm thankful for the things I learned during that time but also realized I wasn't cut out to be a single parent by choice (via adoption.) I had lots of single parent friends who tried to convince me to adopt but that's not what happened. I also could not have financially afforded an adoption by myself.

I used to think I might marry someone who had kids, but that's not what happened, and I feel I'm in a different stage of life now. My way of giving back is sponsoring kids through my former adoption agency. Some might say that's not enough but I feel it's what God leads me to do.

I have met some people who are very against adoption, which I know is a very personal subject. I understand that they might very well have similar feelings about adopting as I have about being a mother at this stage in life -- I just don't feel I'm cut out for it, and some of my friends are becoming young Grandma's. Now I like going and helping other people with their families when I can rather than thinking about having my own.

But you are right in that we are all adopted into God's family, and we would all be in a lot of trouble if God didn't believe in adoption either.
Thats a big question 'who am I' but I suppose if you are a christian you may be a bit more secure in your identity eg Gods child, in Christ.

I dont think I could be a solo parent that would be too hard have a dependent rely on me for everything

Ive not figured out why people are called caucasians when only very few people are from caucasia (causcasian mountains? or am I mixing that up with carpathia) why are they not called Europeans from Europe and asians from ...Asia. I suppose in America they cant just call them Americans (North and South) the only time I ever hear people being described as Causcasian is on Crimewatch tv show where police are discussing criminal profiles.

You being born in Asia, you can say well I am from Korea and been adopted thats why I live here, but I have to explain well I am NOT from Asia and live in this country because I was born here so I am from here, but people always ask me where I am from. It gets a bit old after a while. Nobody has to ask me if they know me or are family, but its like I dont tend to ask people where they are from the instant I meet them...I just take them as they are.

I am not the immigrant police or border control.
 

Poinsetta

Well-known member
Nov 24, 2018
10,660
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I might have two (2) soulmates (is that possible?) (question for the op) i love them both and i cherish them in their own unique way wait do dogs count? my dog is like my daughter nah my dog is just a kid. Anyway I love my two soulmates i know i have their back just as they have mine. And i don’t wish any harm on them i’m just thankful I have them and I pray for their wellbeing may God protect them wherever they go. ♥️💓