When I Die

Kind of a morbid topic, but...

What do you want to happen when you die?

Do you want to be cremated? Where do you want your ashes scattered? Buried? Tossed in the ocean, burial at sea?

Do you want a traditional Southern funeral? A traditional Northern funeral? Memorial service? Irish Wake?

This is something I have been thinking about for a couple of weeks, because Grandma just died and we had her funeral Tuesday. It probably won't be the most hilarious thread in the forum, but it could be informative.

I have decided what I want to happen. I want to be buried quickly, quietly and privately.

I don't want anything done in the sanctuary, no memorial service or funeral, nobody sitting around crying or telling sad stories about how they miss me.

I want to have a big church dinner. I will have money set aside for a whole hog BBQ, a chocolate fountain with various things set around it to run under the chocolate, and three tubs of ice cream, chocolate, peach and rainbow sherbet.

If I wind up in the north before I die, the whole hog barbecue might change to something more area appropriate. We'll see.

I want them to have the kind of celebration I would want to attend if I was still alive. And such a setting will cut down a lot on the morose aspects. It's hard to be gloomy at a good church dinner.

Oh yeah...

If you happen to see somebody take a plate of barbecue and pass it under the chocolate fountain... Mind ya business. This is my funeral. Let people enjoy themselves.

When I was 1 year old, my maternal grandmother started paying for burial insurance for me. I didn't even know I had burial insurance back then. After she passed, I started paying it. I've been paying it several years now. It's currently paid ahead. I have a burial plot that my dad bought when he was in the military (before I was born). I have a chosen funeral director, hopefully he'll still be around when I pass on. More recently, I've decided on how I want my gravestone to look and what I want it to say. The most planned out thing about my life has always been my death.

My plot is just south of the city where I live, it's in a rural area on a peaceful hill overlooking both the county where I live and the Osage where I grew up. I want to be buried quietly. I do not want a celebration of life, memorial service, any other type of service, party, or any of that. Besides, I'm losing all my people. At this point, about the only people that would attend is the funeral director. At this point in my life, being buried in my plot next to my dad is all that matters to me concerning what happens to my body after I die. My plot is the last one in that row to be filled.

If I'm somewhere else when I die, I want to be flown back to Oklahoma and buried in my plot.

I used to joke with people and tell them I wanted to be cremated from the neck down, but I wanted my head shot out of the big civil war cannon in Columbus Ga. 🤷

My thinking on it now is that I want to be cremated. I'm not sure if I want the ashes put straight in a hole in the ground or put in a box to be buried.
I just don't know yet.

No service or memorial or anything like that. I don't want my kids spending whatever money I leave them on my funeral.