D
Blueriversice,
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I've been there. Once you distance yourself from your family the ones abusing you. The anger will eventually turn into acceptance.
Trusting is not something that is easy for people that have been abused.
Picking up characteristics of the people you were around is normal that doesn't mean you are that way. Take a step back and analyze what's happening when your talking.
When your abuse by your family it will cause self hatred. People are like chicken they pick on the one that's different. Don't show weakness unless you know for sure that person is a Christian too. God wants us to be humble not subservient.
Also you'll natural feel attracted to people like your father. This isnt your fault.
Take it a day at a time.
Sometimes this life is very painful. But our Heavenly Father is so good to us. He always there to comfort when we feel like we can't handle it even one more day. Our father says everything he say is true, right, and he keeps all his promises.
You have to choose the man you don't feel comfortable with. Also think of the man that you want and what he want in his woman. You can improve. We aren't rocks we are clay. God made us perfect you know the Asians have saying that would fit "the most beautiful flower are grown in mud." Your suffering has caused your heart to feel more then the average person ever could.
As for friends it's never been easy for me either. My grandfather could make people hate him in record time and it was very hard for me for many years not to rub people the wrong way. You could have a similar problem. Your not cursed. It simply a habit it can be changed. Until then attending church and solializing with your church congregation will likely gain you friends.
This book might help https://www.amazon.com/Nasty-People-Being-without-Stooping/dp/0071410228
God bless
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I've been there. Once you distance yourself from your family the ones abusing you. The anger will eventually turn into acceptance.
Trusting is not something that is easy for people that have been abused.
Picking up characteristics of the people you were around is normal that doesn't mean you are that way. Take a step back and analyze what's happening when your talking.
When your abuse by your family it will cause self hatred. People are like chicken they pick on the one that's different. Don't show weakness unless you know for sure that person is a Christian too. God wants us to be humble not subservient.
Also you'll natural feel attracted to people like your father. This isnt your fault.
Take it a day at a time.
Sometimes this life is very painful. But our Heavenly Father is so good to us. He always there to comfort when we feel like we can't handle it even one more day. Our father says everything he say is true, right, and he keeps all his promises.
You have to choose the man you don't feel comfortable with. Also think of the man that you want and what he want in his woman. You can improve. We aren't rocks we are clay. God made us perfect you know the Asians have saying that would fit "the most beautiful flower are grown in mud." Your suffering has caused your heart to feel more then the average person ever could.
As for friends it's never been easy for me either. My grandfather could make people hate him in record time and it was very hard for me for many years not to rub people the wrong way. You could have a similar problem. Your not cursed. It simply a habit it can be changed. Until then attending church and solializing with your church congregation will likely gain you friends.
This book might help https://www.amazon.com/Nasty-People-Being-without-Stooping/dp/0071410228
God bless
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