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Hello guys, so I am currently at a stage in my walk with the Lord where I feel the peace of God and bless His name for it, I feel peace and it is good. I am looking for some advice and wisdom on a lot, I feel like I am looking for something out there and I tried to find it in intellect and in worldly wisdom and such, and I believe I am missing a lot, I am missing something, maybe a spouse, maybe some sense of value, I am not sure, I am filled up with the Spirit, I am feeling the blessing of God, but I feel like I am not there yet or like I am dead somehow, it's strange, I cannot describe this feeling and its of my heart. Forgive my improper grammar, I am trying to work on some skills to get better at thinking and articulating myself, and find that I would like to avoid making minor lapses. I want to talk to someone with whom I can relate with, and I find that I have very strange fellowship here, I am looking for someone to fill a void in my life, maybe I am needing a wife. Its strange how we can be so cruel and how many Christians do not take sin seriously and do not watch, it's bad for two reasons: one I find it harder to fellowship, and two, whomever is not cautious or taking their sin seriously is still in need of a work, so what can I do? Mentoring or something? I would like to talk with someone I wish I could find somebody or a group that understands me and that I can connect with in the Spirit/by the Spirit and also spiritually (by the Holy Ghost and in spirit).
This sounds a lot like one of my trips to the psychologist, I feel numb, kind of like all the hurts people have dealt me have accumulated so that even something like calling me out on a minor fault gives me a sense of pain somewhere, I have maybe hatred in my heart, or something like coldness or sadness, I feel very sad that's how I feel. Very sad that maybe I have been denied a lot, and that the things I held in high regard turned out to be very foolish, no matter how much I appreciated them, they were foolish, and lacked the heavenly substance that makes wisdom so very precious to me.
Please pray for my heart, maybe I am sick in the heart, maybe I am in need of healing, maybe I am tired, maybe I am worn out, I need clarity, reality, reason and wisdom, maybe I am missing love.
This sounds a lot like one of my trips to the psychologist, I feel numb, kind of like all the hurts people have dealt me have accumulated so that even something like calling me out on a minor fault gives me a sense of pain somewhere, I have maybe hatred in my heart, or something like coldness or sadness, I feel very sad that's how I feel. Very sad that maybe I have been denied a lot, and that the things I held in high regard turned out to be very foolish, no matter how much I appreciated them, they were foolish, and lacked the heavenly substance that makes wisdom so very precious to me.
Please pray for my heart, maybe I am sick in the heart, maybe I am in need of healing, maybe I am tired, maybe I am worn out, I need clarity, reality, reason and wisdom, maybe I am missing love.