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Jan 5, 2016

Young Childhood

When I was a year and a half years old I saw a quarter and picked it up on the carpet, put in my mouth and swallowed the quarter, I started turning blue and JESUS used my mom’s friend to give me Heimlich maneuver. There has to be a God, wow. I thought I almost drowned in a pool but it was swallowing a quarter, God must of needed me. Another incident when I was a child, like 6 my friend wanted to see me so I ran and wasn’t paying attention as I stepped down the stairs in the mobile home, did not know there was not any stairs that day, I tripped over a big piece of glass, and it came toppling over me, I started bleeding horribly dad was driving me to hospital blessed I was okay my mom was at work. I could have died, Jesus saved me. I guess the pool thing was a dream I don’t know what that meant maybe JESUS was showing me how blessed I am alive. I was in a pool didn’t know how old I was, I was in pool I was curious to go to the deep end but didn’t know how to swim almost drowned Jesus was there used my mom friend penny to get me.

When I was 7 years old, I was taken from my parents, by my grandparents, I knew God but did not know HIM personally. I think I was in the library and I said to my aunt sari (who needs prayer to come to JESUS) I told her at a young age, I want to go Bible college and learn all about the Bible. I was not happy with my grandparents they were old fashioned, very strict (But i see now that I appreciate God put me in that because i did not learn that much which i do not need to know, like drugs and alcohol. The only thing i loved then was meeting my grandmas cousins husband HE LOVED JESUS, he had a brain tumor and died in 2005. (But I love my gp because they protected, God knew what He was doing.)i adored my cousin and Jesus used him to bring me to write a song about God. going back a little like 1999 went to ccd catholic school.

I wasn’t interested in anything accept boys because when I was like 6 to 7 I was around a lot of sex, drugs, and babysitters who did drugs and other stop. I was never comfortable doing the rosary I had so much anxiety doing it too many rules. I went to catholic camp in wisconsin and got Baptized when i was 12- 13 years sprinkled later realizing thats not the way to be Baptize. I did have a habit saying the Lord’s Prayer every night before I went to bed when I was 11, I started praying to God.

The prayer asking God to bring my parents back or one of them brought me closer to God, sad thing I didn’t know JESUS yet. God answered my prayer in 8th grade, gp said there was someone here and i never would have guessed thats true i did not guess right, I was changed by that still in my heart, I was close to God but when highschool came, the closeness left :(

High School

I first went to a co ed boarding school, I did not lose my boy crazy personality. I became friends with a bad role model and she was provocative girl where I followed after her, she loved boys and tried to have all the boys I wanted a boyfriend too. I always found love in all the wrong places. I even wrote my gp that I was going to marry a guy in California and leave the school.

My gp were scared and said they were sending me to all girls boarding school. I got bullied, called ugly, I was nothing, I was treated so bad one girl almost punched me, I hated it. I was in essence choir and sing HIS eyes on a sparrow. The last year was roommates with the wrong person i was prude than she convinced me about boys and i became a lustful girl. I wish I stayed prude she talked about sex and told me i should loose lose my virginity, my gp would not let me have a boyfriend, wish I waited.

2009 before graduating, I had an incident took depression pills made me all happy then I turned hateful and stabbing myself with pens and wanting to go throw myself down the stairs. I thought it was me asking for help but it was with JESUS. A girl there introduced me to Catholic church again I was away from God for a while. My gp took everyone away from me I was lonely, sad, and hurt. Realized that JESUS was there for me the whole time in my life.

After High School
After I graduated high school I was a mess, wanted love, wanted a boyfriend, wanted to try new things. The meeting guys online turned to an obsession, made craigslist post, went on every dating site. I met guys online and in person let them use me because I thought they would love me and marry me. I was desperate for love didn’t have it wherever I was. I was a mess and sad. Please do not be desperate in getting a bf or gf not worth it wait for Gods besttttttttttt.
Danced proactive online ugh, one time it became so bad did not show myself to a guy and he became crazy said he was going to spread videos to my family and friends and I wanted to die it was horrible, but he was all talk when my husband talked to him on facebook that was later in the story, my story on meeting my hubby. God protected me from all the guys I met didn’t know that at the time. Got raped 3 times; (Almost died many times) Later on yes there are consequences to our actions I got hpv later down the road. Please wait till marriage, do not give your precious gift that God made for only marriage. You will regret it.

So I talked and met guys online and then 21 years old I was wild drinking, smoking pott, wantint to become lesbian because I was tired of getting cheated on and used for sex. I could not sleep and used alcohol to sleep in the beginning worked but got sooo badddddddddd. My schecule was worse than before I started drinking. One night I was sick of not being able to sleep because of thoughts crazy I relied on multipcation and counting sheeps but than said GOD PLEASE CALM MY MIND AND HELP ME SLEEP PLEASE. Slept so well been a long time, I think that changed my heart. I started watching scary movies like obsessed oh man God got me out of that before all these scary movies now I am blessed. Thank you LORD SO MUCH I LOVE YOU. 2011-2013.

May 2013 felt a tug from God to change repent of my ways homosexuality, porn, drugs, alcohol to sleep, sex out of marriage, masturbation just every evil out there. He helped me stopped doing all that. I was praying for a Godly man 3 years before God coming to wake me up. So may 29, 2013 stopped drinking, having sex and smoking. The other stuff was slowly.

Had this guy on facebook for a year 2012 barely talked to him only for money asked how old he was in May 29, 2013 he asked if I was the one for him God told him to go on a train and go to Chicago your marrying her. He came the next month July 8,2013. He was very strong in God. Was engaged August 1,2013. Around August or september WROTE MANY SONGS THROUGH MY HUBBY AND I. I might post some of the songs with the lyrics. There beautiful.
My husband wanted a blessing from my dad went to see him, late September 2013. Got Baptized September 8,2013 together with hubby. Got married October 10, 2013. GETTING BAPTIZED AND ACCEPTING JESUS AS MY LORD AND SAVIOR WAS THE BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE <3333 GOD

After Being Born Again the truth came out.

After accepting JESUS (09/08/2013), my eyes were open, learned that fear was baddd. I dealt with it fear, feeling if I was loved, saw bad movies which made me have nightmares, God was still delivering me from everything. 2014 year was horrible, dealt with ocddd :((( but praise JESUS I was delivered in September 2014. 2015- 2016 I still deal with things I try to have peace and joy. Jesus is Lord. Has anyone dealt with anything after accepting JESUS??????This trial I am dealing with now brought a lot of suicidal thoughts I ever had in my life, I am getting better each day please pray it just goes away, some days are good, others are bad. I love Jesus and I am so happy I accepted HIM. HES the best person in my life. Please pray for hubby that he stays with JESUS because sometimes I want to end my marriage, it’s so hard :( the hpv I prays gone they haven’t called with bad results praise JESUS.

I am really looking for sisters in Christ who I can talk to, pray with, encourage I sometimes need help and advice. Maybe women who have been married for a long time and can help me what did they do when theirs fights or distance in your marriage also who dealt with or deals with intrusive thoughts about God and His nature ugh i hate it and i wish it would go away, what do you do.

2017 I am better still deal with thoughts but JESUS IS FAITHFUL. HES REALLY CHANGING MY HEART IF I DO NOT HAVE HIM I WOULD HAVE NOTHING. Hes teaching me about complaining how much HE HATES IT, He’s teaching me contentment, Hes teaching to use HIS WORD ON EVERY THOUGHT. I AM GETTING BETTER. I do have a testimony on the ocd thing I will share it. I realized i did not have ocd blapshmous thoughts against God before accepting Jesus. So i know its just attacks.

4/19/2017-4/20/2017 Hes teaching me to rely on Him on everything, like submitting to my mom I am submitting to Him. How to do things for Him because I love Him. Show me that I am truly saved because I do not do the things I used to do. I changed the music from worldly to Christian and worldy movies to Christian movies; I am learning moderation. Be careful what you listen and watch, and read anywhere especially online oh man got attacked so many times because of the internet. Hes teaching me how to love. Just being imitatator to HIS SON. HE revealed 3 times I have the gift of healing <3333 pray for me that I just have a different mindset on this mind battle its my cross and thorn to humble myself to JESUS, Oh man yes it is. I love you guys I hope your blessed by reading this.

I wish I can write my mom and hubbys testimony its so amazin GODS SO AMAZING <333333333 HE ALLOWS US TO GO THROUGH THIS BECAUSE WE CAN COME TO HIS SON. <333333

Last edited:
Jan 5, 2016
To sum it up

God brought me my mom.
God brought me a Godly man
God brought our family together
God brought my dad to JESUS.


Senior Member
Oct 25, 2016
Truly beautiful that Jesus and you met through all this. I posted my testimony somewhere on here as jkalyna. We were made to have that special place in us, that only God's love could fill. WE are like that prodigal son, looking for something in the world, finding nothing most of the time, but hurts, and pains, distress's and mess's. Yes Jesus is the answer. God Be with you, and yours. Many miracles you've had, believing The Lord is not finished yet with you.