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I feel this overwhelming need to share my testimony with y'all tonight. So here goes. I grew up in church but around my middle school years I stopped attending and fell into the things of this world. In 8th grade (can't remember exactly how old I was) I got caught smoking cigarettes in the school bathroom (idiotic, I know)
I was taken out of school because of "fights" I just wanted to fit in, wanted to be accepted. I got back into public schools by the time the 9th grade started, I would walk in the front doors and walk right out the back doors. Skipping school and roaming the town. Running away from home. I made all f's in 9th grade so they put me in alternative school where I worked towards getting my GED. I then met my "friends" I begin smoking marijuana and drinking.
I always said that pills would never be my thing. I started stealing money and my mother's alcohol (she was an alcoholic at the time) I had job after job, stayed out late, was with a different guy every night. in 2007-08 I got my GED and begin partying harder. The first thing I thought about when I woke up was how can I get high today... the last thing I thought about before I went to bed is I wish I was higher, how can I get higher, how will I get high tomorrow. I stole money, drugs, and things to sell for money.
over the next few years it got worse, I started snorting a variety of pills. looking for any way to get high. had an amazing job, 160 hrs every 2 weeks, killer money, and it all went to trying to get away from here and buying drugs or alcohol, pipes, wraps, clothes, food.
I met a guy who i thought i loved (at the time I didn't know what love was) he moved in with me and my mother, then the night we moved into our apartment he didn't come home from work until very late. well, what i thought was work. his "friend" dropped him off. the next morning he broke up with me and started dating her.
i was absolutely broken. 2009 I started going to church just to get out of the house when a few weeks into going, Jesus pricked at my heart. I can still remember the lesson that night... about moses on the mnt with God and when He came down his face was glowing. I gave my heart to Jesus. A few weeks after doing so (and don't tell me that I wasn't saved because I know that I was. I heard God talk to me and tell me not to do what I did)
I met up with a friend (who did things that I knew were bad, I messed up) and I ended up getting high... I have backslid a number of times in my walk with Jesus... but 2 years ago this December I made up my mind and surrendered completely to God.
I am still a horrible person, I am not where I need to be with God but I know He is working on me. To label me a prodigal would be only scratching the surface but God took me back. I can't even right now... I am just so overwhelmed by Him. I've been struggling lately to spend time with Him, struggling with the thought that if I truly love Him like I say I do that I would do more... but Jesus loves me so much and when He looks at my book now He doesn't see Brittanie, He sees His blood, with my name written in Red. He "READ" me.
I am so unworthy... but I am not ashamed to share this with you. This doesn't even begin to tell half of it, I could probably keep going but for now... until next time... God bless.
I was taken out of school because of "fights" I just wanted to fit in, wanted to be accepted. I got back into public schools by the time the 9th grade started, I would walk in the front doors and walk right out the back doors. Skipping school and roaming the town. Running away from home. I made all f's in 9th grade so they put me in alternative school where I worked towards getting my GED. I then met my "friends" I begin smoking marijuana and drinking.
I always said that pills would never be my thing. I started stealing money and my mother's alcohol (she was an alcoholic at the time) I had job after job, stayed out late, was with a different guy every night. in 2007-08 I got my GED and begin partying harder. The first thing I thought about when I woke up was how can I get high today... the last thing I thought about before I went to bed is I wish I was higher, how can I get higher, how will I get high tomorrow. I stole money, drugs, and things to sell for money.
over the next few years it got worse, I started snorting a variety of pills. looking for any way to get high. had an amazing job, 160 hrs every 2 weeks, killer money, and it all went to trying to get away from here and buying drugs or alcohol, pipes, wraps, clothes, food.
I met a guy who i thought i loved (at the time I didn't know what love was) he moved in with me and my mother, then the night we moved into our apartment he didn't come home from work until very late. well, what i thought was work. his "friend" dropped him off. the next morning he broke up with me and started dating her.
i was absolutely broken. 2009 I started going to church just to get out of the house when a few weeks into going, Jesus pricked at my heart. I can still remember the lesson that night... about moses on the mnt with God and when He came down his face was glowing. I gave my heart to Jesus. A few weeks after doing so (and don't tell me that I wasn't saved because I know that I was. I heard God talk to me and tell me not to do what I did)
I met up with a friend (who did things that I knew were bad, I messed up) and I ended up getting high... I have backslid a number of times in my walk with Jesus... but 2 years ago this December I made up my mind and surrendered completely to God.
I am still a horrible person, I am not where I need to be with God but I know He is working on me. To label me a prodigal would be only scratching the surface but God took me back. I can't even right now... I am just so overwhelmed by Him. I've been struggling lately to spend time with Him, struggling with the thought that if I truly love Him like I say I do that I would do more... but Jesus loves me so much and when He looks at my book now He doesn't see Brittanie, He sees His blood, with my name written in Red. He "READ" me.
I am so unworthy... but I am not ashamed to share this with you. This doesn't even begin to tell half of it, I could probably keep going but for now... until next time... God bless.
