Re-dedicated my life to Jesus

Ginger1020 - I am not sinning and it is kind of presumptuous of you to judge me so. I am not going to post of here any more because of the way you talked to me in your post. I have known the things of God and the Bible for all of my life, but I was not walking close to God when I moved in here with him. I have stated that when I rededicated my life things changed for me, I knew something had to be done about this situation. I have not having sex with him and haven't in a couple of years, I am reading the bible and praying every day and asking God to provide a way out of this situation. I don't know what world you live in, but not everyone can just go stay with someone and not everyone has the finances to just pick up and walk out the door.

You should be careful in what you say on here, what advice you give because you could destroy a less grounded christian. As it was; you did upset me with implying that I should just walk out the door and go where? Stand on the street or go to a homeless shelter? I don't think so. I have to use my head and wait until I can leave and support myself. You don't know how God has been dealing with me, what I've gone through but i'm not going to just turn on this man and say i'm leaving because you don't believe the way I do. I have to be a christian example and we are living here as friends, nothing more. I don't need this kind of advice, I don't need to feel back about what I cannot change.

Everyone on here has been supportive and I appreciate it but I can't listen to negative advice. I believe what you said as far as the bible goes and I know the scriptures but I have no choice in this matter at this time so I am working on a plan to leave and make sure I don't sleep on a cardboard box in some alley. I am a minsters daughter and I am not a homeless person, that would be foolish of me to just leave here without a plan. God understands that I made a mistake and he will help me get out of this situation, I have no doubt. To take your suggestion would be to just strike out on my own without any direction from God. I have to wait for God to show me his will in where I should go. I am 56 yrs old and i'm not going to be rash in my decision to leave here, it will be at the right time, God's time. If I had left when this first happened I wouldn't have been ready for it and would not have learned everything God has shown me.

You don't know anything about my life so you really have no right to tell me these things. I know what the bible says, its speaks of fornication but I am not sinning in any way and haven't been for some time, I am like renting this room, this was my home, these are my things, would you just leave your home if someone told you to? No, you would pray about it and then plan for it, not go out blindly and just hope you wind up some place nice. I am not living in my past as you mentioned, my past is behind me and God has forgiven me as well as you for our past mistakes, I am living in the here and now and trusting God for the future. This is scary enough without being told I am sinning and I need to get out right away. GAbby is not distracting me in any way as you said.

It is not your place to judge me or condemn me or tell me to get out or God will not bless me. The bible says Judge not; lest ye be judged and you are judging me right now. Its easy to give advice when you don't know how it feels to be in this situation. I don't know your situation but I would never be presumptuous and tell you what to do or when to do it. We can't just jump into another worse situation without waiting on God to show us what we must do. I am in this situation because I loved him and I thought we were getting married, how was I to know we wouldn't be getting married but until last year it didn't really matter to me if he married me or not, its only since I rededicated my life that this is an issue and I am willing to do the right thing, but not to go out impulsively with no where to go. I wouldn't tell anyone that.

I won't be coming back on this site but I did want everyone else to know how much I appreciate what you have said to me, all your encouragement because as christians we are to build one another up instead of tearing one another down. I have enough to deal with at this time and I don't need to be judged or told what to do, I only listen to God. Gabby still has the opportunity to do the right thing until I go but once I go there will be no coming back. This breaks my heart because he is a good man and we have loved each other for a very long time and it is not a cut and dried situatiuon. I will be leaving a lot when I leave him, all my memories and hopes and dreams and going out into the world and starting over and praying that I will find happiness.

I do not need to be told that I have to concentrate on my relationship with God, if I didn't want to do that I would not be making these decisions. I cannot let anyone bring me down, no matter the intention, good or bad, but sometimes we forget that we are not God and we shouldn't try to do his job for him since he does it much better.

Baroness Please do not stop posting because someone judged you we know as Christians we are not the judge i believe with all my heart that God has a plan for you I fully understand you situation and there is no reason for you to leave, there is nothing wrong with a man and a woman living under the same room as long as they are not living as husband and wife out of wed lock. I will continue to pray about you and your situation God will provide answers stay strong and lean on him is the best advice I can give you God Bless you

God is so GOOD.

Chellebee- Thank you for your kind words and I have not posted on here in awhile but kept in contact with a christian sister who has been encouraging me and then I just read what you wrote. The thing about it is, ginger1020 did have some good points,she just didn't use wisdom in how she said it and perhaps didn't realize that I know all of this already. Although there is no sex involved I do believe that God does not want me here under these conditions but I am still waiting for the finances to leave. The other night I had to leave here because he got drunk and started cussing me out and it was horrible so I went to a friends house for the night. I went to the hearing for the disability but my attorney was late an hour and the judge wouldn't wait so now I have to wait until November 15th for another hearing and it was very upsetting but I am trusting God and have gotten very close to him since I posted on here and it is not his will that I stay here but I believe I will be leaving towards the end of the year.

My mother is thinking of moving into this 3 bedroom house and wants me to move in with her and I will be doing that. He apologized for cussing at me but I told him I couldn't live with the drinking and he got upset and when I came home yesterday he was very sorry and seemed scared, he thought I had actually left him. I will be leaving him but until then I will do my best to seek God and I have changed very much since I rededicated my life and I am happy in Jesus and he is weeding out the things he doesn't want in my life. My mother told me next time he gets drunk like that to go to my friends house near here again and then my brother would come and pick me up and I could stay with her. I hate to do that because she's way out in the desert and I would have to take a long bus ride to get to my hearing but if it happens again I will do as my mother asked. I shouldn't have to be in this kind of situation. I almost didn't come back at all but I can only stay with my friend for 30 days so since he apologized and isn't drinking I decided to stay and felt it the wisest course for now but I will leave if it happens again and just trust God to help me.

I am thankful that I have a good girlfriend who lives near me that came and got me that night and welcomed me into her home and I am also thankful that I have a christian family because a lot of people have no one and if they get in a situation like this they have to either live on the street or go to a homeless shelter and lose everything they have. God has always provided a way for me and I know that he always will and he also provided good friends on this site for me and I will keep posting, I just don't like condemnation or whatever you call it. I know the bible and I am trying to do what God wants me to do but sometimes you can't just jump into another situation that God hasn't led you to do.

I have a problem I hope you all can give me advice on. If you've read my previous postings you know what kind of situation I am in and now I need advice cause I don't know what to do. I am leaving here as soon as I can. I have a hearing in November for disability and I can leave any time after that but the problem is that I probably won't get any money for a couple of months. I am living with a man who is not a christian but claims to love God but it is on his terms. He doens't listen to ministers or anyone who would tell him he isn't living right before God and he drink and curses and we sleep apart and have been for years and there is no sex involved and next year it will be 2 years. Since I rededicated my life things have changed. God has shown me many things about myself and I have grown a lot. He cussed me out one night when he was drunk and I didn't cuss back! I left and stayed with a friend. I would have started a new post on here but couldn't figure out how to do it.

My mother is going to move into a big house so I can come and live with her but she isn't doing that right away but within the next few months but its hard to save money right now. I have been packing and even told him several times that I intend to leave him but he says I won't do it and I will come back. It is not God's will for me to be here but I believe he understands about me going to the hearing first because my mother lives way out in the desert and I can't go there at this time. There isn't enough room so we decided to move into a large house together. The problem is that he doesn't have enough money to live here alone. I pay electric and two hundred dollars for food and he pays rent and cable and will have forty dollars left over until May when his workmans comp. starts up again and I can't stay here until then!

I wanted to stay until I got my first disability check and that may be February but I don't even want to stay until then but if I leave before that puts him in a hard situation and it isn't my will to be unkind or unfair. What do I do? Do I leave after the hearing and go live with my mom even though she hasn't moved into a house yet or do I stay here until she gets the house and then move? Or do I stay here until I get some money to give him, even then when I go he won't be getting that money. When I get the retro active amount I plan on giving him $1500 so he can buy a van and I feel its only fair since he has supported us basically when I lost my job but I have always given him some money whether it be unemployment insurance but I don't give him money now but pay those things I just mentioned. To stay for the retro active would mean as much as 6 months. I don't want to stay here that long because I want to be in God's will so please give me your advice because I'm so confused. I want to do the right thing by God and yet I don't want to just leave without a care for gabby. I have left men before and never looked back but this situation is different because I had nowhere to do. Please help me because I am lost on this one. God bless you, baroness.

I haven't posted on this thread in quite awhile. I am still in this house because they judge refused to give me disability and not only that, he said I lied about my pain. He said other things just as demeaning and I was very upset when I finally got his decision and letter. I didn't understand why God didn't allow me to get it and I questioned him on it because I thought he wanted me out of here. However; God and I have been growing closer and I still read my bible and pray every day even though my future looks bleak. I finally told him that I was going to leave him because I can't live with a man I am not married to. He said I would never leave him and its horrible around here. Not all the time but he just sits out there and watches tv and complains about paying bills. He stopped drinking months ago and he still sleeps on the sofa and now there has been no physical relationship for over 2 years. I was very disappointed by the hearing but I have to trust God anyway. What is he doing? I know it isn't his will I stay here with a man I am not married to but I have no choice, my circumstances have not changed so my attorney is filing for an appeal but in the meantime I have tried to find a job but I haven't been able to. Sometimes I get so depressed but I have to hang onto my faith in God. I am very nice to Gabby and I cook and clean this place but spend most of my time either cooking or in my room. He doesn't think I will ever leave him and i've told him 3 times that I am going to, that I must do what God wants me to do. I feel so helpless and my mother is not moving into a house any time soon so I am trapped here. At first I just hated being here but now I have to get the victory over this. I can't think what God wants of me other than to trust him when things look bleak and depressing. I've had my days, trust me but I am trying to be positive.

My doctor did give me a pill that helps my back pain in the day time and he healed my arm which hurt more than anything when I reaching out for something or behind me, the pain is gone but I had disc and joint disease and osteoarthritis. I would like you all to pray for me even though I noticed no one responded to my last post. I only hope I still have friends on this thread.

Wow I really feeel for you Baroness, I love you my sister in Christ. I said that because I am going to hit you with some truth. Get out, You are not in a situation that God would aprove of. 2 corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? If gabby was a believer he would know the truth and the truth would make him free instead of confined to the couch. Go to your Pastor, he is the head of the believers at your church. He will help you.