I have always believed in God. He has been with me since day one till now, I do believe he has never left me, however me is a different story. Long story short, I got divorced in 2010. It was and has been the hardest 7 years of my life, and believe me, growing up was a challenge with my mother, never had a male figure in my life growing up, so that made things so much worse., but that another story for another time. The man that claimed to love me hurt me so much. He turned my children against me. He did everything in his power to see me fall and hoped that I would never come back up. The entire time I held on tight to God. He saw me through so much and still does. The day I lost custody of my children was the worse day. I lost them to false witnesses, lies and worse of all, betrail by my own child. I hated God that day. I couldn't understand why this was happing. I fell into a deep depression. God being the great heavenly father he slowly started to show me his plan for me. Little by little the anger and pain and hurt I had started to be less and less. He gave me more then I had lost. The plan he had for me was more then I could ever imagine. A lot of wonderful things have happened to me and that pain and hurt no longer affect me unless I let it, and I try hard to not let myself get there again. So after all that has happened, I have a hard time getting back to church. I have visited a few and have found one I really like, but find myself hesitant. Any one have any suggestions as of why I am so afraid to get back? I love going to church so it's hard to understand why I feel so unsure of going back.