Advice needed?

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OldSouledHippie

OldSouledHippie

Junior Member
Feb 11, 2016
28
2
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So, over the last year, my mom and I's relationship has fallen apart. I admit some wrong-doing on my part. I have lashed out at her before. I "went behind her back" and ranted to my grandmother about how I felt like I was being put on a back burner and isolated for being different from the rest. I did feel that I had unrealistic expectations and they wanted me to do things I didn't want to. I understand they want the best for me, but it gets to be a little much sometimes. Almost pressured. But unfortunately, I have let that anger get to me sometimes. We had a big blowout on the way to work one day and she was angry the rest of the night. I've never felt like a stranger in my own house until things started going down between my parents and I. There have been way too many things unsaid and it's tearing this family apart. I can't take it anymore. What should I do? There's more to be told, but I don't wanna get too personal unless I know you better.
 
Just say sorry for what you did. Hopefully they will too then. Don't know the situation, but when I was 19 my dad would continually be controlling and I had to study like always. If I sat in front of the tv it was: You're hanging around. Go study! Didn't get mad but I couldn't take it anymore and prayed for a room and got a nice room in a christian students' home.
 
When people don't communicate, such as how you are saying goes on in your house, this is what happens. Resentment builds because nothing gets resolved, just swept under the rug and pretend it didn't happen.
And communication is a two way street. Not one person doing all the talking, but two people talking, and also two people listening and attempting to understand.
It's hard to give any more detailed of a response than that, because we have no idea if your parents are Christian. If their expectations are reasonable or what they are about. So, really, overall, what can be said is things won't get better until you both learn to communicate and be understand to what each other says, and stop leaving so much unsaid.
 
OldSouledHippie said:
So, over the last year, my mom and I's relationship has fallen apart. I admit some wrong-doing on my part. I have lashed out at her before. I "went behind her back" and ranted to my grandmother about how I felt like I was being put on a back burner and isolated for being different from the rest. I did feel that I had unrealistic expectations and they wanted me to do things I didn't want to. I understand they want the best for me, but it gets to be a little much sometimes. Almost pressured. But unfortunately, I have let that anger get to me sometimes. We had a big blowout on the way to work one day and she was angry the rest of the night. I've never felt like a stranger in my own house until things started going down between my parents and I. There have been way too many things unsaid and it's tearing this family apart. I can't take it anymore. What should I do? There's more to be told, but I don't wanna get too personal unless I know you better.
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Well.....darlin it's tough to say and I realize you don't want things to get to personal.....i don't know what the arguments are about but don't let a whoke. Bunch of. Little things go adding up.....start with the biggest one that bothers you the most....figure out why it bothers you......then try to see why your mom or your parents are trying to pressure you with it.... What do you see that they dont... What do they see what you don't or maybe they are not understanding how you see and understand things.. Once you break it down for yourself it's easier to break it down for them.....then just do that with all the other stuff and see if it helps.....AND IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THAT, pray and ask God what he thinks is best and ask Him to give you understanding...... God bless
 
First: That dog is adorable.

Second: Unspoken feelings can lead to unresolved tension. Can you find a time and place to peaceably hash it out? (Doing so might change things for the better or worse, so handle with kid gloves.)
 
OldSouledHippie said:
There have been way too many things unsaid and it's tearing this family apart. I can't take it anymore. What should I do?
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Say it! Iron it out. Be willing to admit your mistakes. Your other choice is to spend a very long life in regret.
 
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