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Attraction:
1. the act, power, or property of attracting.
2. attractive quality; magnetic charm; fascination; allurement; enticement: the subtle attraction of her strange personality.
3. a person or thing that draws, attracts, allures, or entices: The main attraction was the after-dinner speaker.
4. a characteristic or quality that provides pleasure; attractive feature: The chief attractions of the evening were the good drinks and witty conversation.
5. Physics. the electric or magnetic force that acts between oppositely charged bodies, tending to draw them together.
Affection
1.fond attachment, devotion, or love: the affection of a parent for an only child.
2.Often, affections.
a.emotion; feeling; sentiment: over and above our reason and affections.
b.the emotional realm of love: a place in his affections.
3.Pathology . a disease, or the condition of being diseased; abnormal state of body or mind: a gouty affection.
4.the act of affecting; act of influencing or acting upon.
5.the state of being affected.
I'm not sure I get the question
1. the act, power, or property of attracting.
2. attractive quality; magnetic charm; fascination; allurement; enticement: the subtle attraction of her strange personality.
3. a person or thing that draws, attracts, allures, or entices: The main attraction was the after-dinner speaker.
4. a characteristic or quality that provides pleasure; attractive feature: The chief attractions of the evening were the good drinks and witty conversation.
5. Physics. the electric or magnetic force that acts between oppositely charged bodies, tending to draw them together.
Affection
1.fond attachment, devotion, or love: the affection of a parent for an only child.
2.Often, affections.
a.emotion; feeling; sentiment: over and above our reason and affections.
b.the emotional realm of love: a place in his affections.
3.Pathology . a disease, or the condition of being diseased; abnormal state of body or mind: a gouty affection.
4.the act of affecting; act of influencing or acting upon.
5.the state of being affected.
I'm not sure I get the question
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GreenNnice
Guest
It's not a fair question, is it, I mean, who wants to answer 'atrraction.'
As a Christian, can I answer that I am much more inclined to date someone I am atrracted too, speaking of a staying relationship (lasting?), chemistry is there, am I even saying this right?
I've not answer for a reason, my own. but, thanks for answering, liamsOn, exactly, well defined, your parameters are in place, and, I see your votes been cast. But is that really what vote you wanted to cast.
Not to put you on the spot, but, yeah, well, you are on the spot.
Why affection? Why does that attract you to a girl ? LOL. pun not intended.
I'm 44 years old, I'm waiting on the Lord, but, I would be dead-wrong, not to mention lying through my teeth, IF I said that I more, on my own devices, doings, would pick a girl on affection over attraction. I haven't voted yet though, who knows, maybe, I will still change my mind.
This thread may go for awhile, or, not, you only HAVE TO vote before making a post IF you want to.
This is an abrasive thread, I admit that, it's working into the deepst, darkest, not to mention, dankest desires of the human heart, and, their resistance to what they REALLY want to say.
But, I digress, is being attracted to either option better than the other.
WHAT will people think of me IF I say I am MOVED by 'atrraction,' and, not, 'affection,' when it comes to asking a girl our or not, when it comes to saying 'yes,' to a guy asking me out or not.
It's like 9 times out of 10, for me, one or the other, I am very particular about who I will give a chance to go out with me , that's attrraction, I love their cologne, the way they do a comb-over (guy) or the sassiness of their dress, or, I will only give a chance to the one that sweet talks me with sweet nothings, or, who laughs at my jokes, or, who flirts my eyes out, so to speak.
And, this is not 'guy,' and, not, 'girl' just that says this, BOTH. But, alas, when you finally DO vote you can pick only ONE.
LiamsON, you're vote is GOOD but is 'affection' really how you will STICK with someone, can you honestly say that in your head that is what attracts you to a girl.
Maybe, the question should be: Can the vote be anything but 'attraction' because, by virtue of the reality of my needing to be attracted to a girl, I must be, first, having that feeling, and, therefore, any subsequent feelings HAVE TO be based off of that attraction..... Maybe the shift of balance (power?) can switch to one from the other, but it was initially the one, attraction, or, it was initially the other.
Does this kind of stereotyping, ultimately, hurt your relationship chances of THIS hook-up working out?
Does God, The Word of His, say anything about this kind of metaphysical stuff? How we should find someone? Rebekah at the well? Ruth and Boaz?Proverbs verses. Prov. 31? Any Psalms? Song of Solomon. I don't know,I guess I am just rambling now, I guess....
Making you think, God bless you, Christ peeps
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Emotionalism vs Intoxication, WAIT! , is 'intoxication' a fair way to label 'attraction' to someone of the opposite sex?
Hmmm, maybe 'affection' and 'attraction' take on different meanings to you now. Maybe, me too. The Lord leads.
Maybe, I should have given the thread a different title, hmmmm
As a Christian, can I answer that I am much more inclined to date someone I am atrracted too, speaking of a staying relationship (lasting?), chemistry is there, am I even saying this right?
I've not answer for a reason, my own. but, thanks for answering, liamsOn, exactly, well defined, your parameters are in place, and, I see your votes been cast. But is that really what vote you wanted to cast.
Not to put you on the spot, but, yeah, well, you are on the spot.
Why affection? Why does that attract you to a girl ? LOL. pun not intended.
I'm 44 years old, I'm waiting on the Lord, but, I would be dead-wrong, not to mention lying through my teeth, IF I said that I more, on my own devices, doings, would pick a girl on affection over attraction. I haven't voted yet though, who knows, maybe, I will still change my mind.
This thread may go for awhile, or, not, you only HAVE TO vote before making a post IF you want to.
This is an abrasive thread, I admit that, it's working into the deepst, darkest, not to mention, dankest desires of the human heart, and, their resistance to what they REALLY want to say.
But, I digress, is being attracted to either option better than the other.
WHAT will people think of me IF I say I am MOVED by 'atrraction,' and, not, 'affection,' when it comes to asking a girl our or not, when it comes to saying 'yes,' to a guy asking me out or not.
It's like 9 times out of 10, for me, one or the other, I am very particular about who I will give a chance to go out with me , that's attrraction, I love their cologne, the way they do a comb-over (guy) or the sassiness of their dress, or, I will only give a chance to the one that sweet talks me with sweet nothings, or, who laughs at my jokes, or, who flirts my eyes out, so to speak.
And, this is not 'guy,' and, not, 'girl' just that says this, BOTH. But, alas, when you finally DO vote you can pick only ONE.
LiamsON, you're vote is GOOD but is 'affection' really how you will STICK with someone, can you honestly say that in your head that is what attracts you to a girl.
Maybe, the question should be: Can the vote be anything but 'attraction' because, by virtue of the reality of my needing to be attracted to a girl, I must be, first, having that feeling, and, therefore, any subsequent feelings HAVE TO be based off of that attraction..... Maybe the shift of balance (power?) can switch to one from the other, but it was initially the one, attraction, or, it was initially the other.
Does this kind of stereotyping, ultimately, hurt your relationship chances of THIS hook-up working out?
Does God, The Word of His, say anything about this kind of metaphysical stuff? How we should find someone? Rebekah at the well? Ruth and Boaz?Proverbs verses. Prov. 31? Any Psalms? Song of Solomon. I don't know,I guess I am just rambling now, I guess....
Making you think, God bless you, Christ peeps
-------0-------
Emotionalism vs Intoxication, WAIT! , is 'intoxication' a fair way to label 'attraction' to someone of the opposite sex?
Hmmm, maybe 'affection' and 'attraction' take on different meanings to you now. Maybe, me too. The Lord leads.
Maybe, I should have given the thread a different title, hmmmm
Noah Webster's Original 1828 Dictionary:
Attraction
Affection
By this understanding, I believe both are needed. Attraction begins the relationship by drawing you to one another, and affection builds and 'coheres' that attraction and relationship. In response to your question, both, depending on the stage.
Attraction
Affection
By this understanding, I believe both are needed. Attraction begins the relationship by drawing you to one another, and affection builds and 'coheres' that attraction and relationship. In response to your question, both, depending on the stage.
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GreenNnice
Guest
But which one, AsIf, do you stake your claim, so to speak, by which of the TWO, the powerful twosome, do you feel will keep the relationship brewing for YOU. Not for her. Or, if a guy, not for him.
Burt, for YOU.
Will something happening to her attraction, like, she gets in a bad accident and face changed, will this CHANGE you, you think?
Will something happening of her affection, who knows, maybe she is raped, just saying, WILL THIS CHANGE your atrractoin to her from her inability, suddenly!, to give you the AFFECTION that hooked you on her in the first place ?
Is that what everyone is saying here then? YOU MUST HAVE ATTRACTION before you can have affection ? It's a given. Both are going to be present in a relationship irregardless of one over the other taking precedence .
Why ?
Do you THINK you could be closer to being ready for marriage IF you would not worry so much about the attraction element NEEDING to be there, and, give the affection element more weight, MUCH MORE WEIGHT ? What about attraction? Are you putting too much weight on affection when it should be on attraction to this person you like?
Both help us arrive at a good decision?
Maybe another question is what is God telling you to do? Attraction or Affection ? What kind of effect does His decision have on your decision, I mean by this, by His leading, don't you see things happening in your relationship that balance the one over the other, seeing His hand in the workings of your relationship ?
You want His decision, right? You want God's blessing?
You wanna be married, right????
I know we all have our ideal mates in mind and this, that, the other, we checklist he/she to be like, but, is this fairytale way of believing in our attraction process an affectionate response to our Creator's making of those we are to go after ?
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BarlyGurl
Guest
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GreenNnice
Guest
Does it ? Does EVERYBODY care about atrtraction before affection, naut ?
Does it begin with attraction, reesepeaceawesomebuddy ?
Can a relationship, bing, bang, bannanabamboo begin with affection, too ?
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GreenNnice
Guest
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BarlyGurl
Guest
I think the bible is clear enough...
Men are to seek and pursue and women are to respond with a yes or no consent. In the aforementioned process... I think it is best for men to truly evaluate woman for demonstratng respect and willingness to be led by him and conversely a woman should be determining if she is truly DOES respect him and is willing to consent to being led by him over the course of her lifetime. God spoke it this way, yet see a plethora of "people" who decide to utilize some other approach... and it leads to disaster. Doing it "your way" pretty much obstructs God's influence on bringing together two suitable partners.
Men are to seek and pursue and women are to respond with a yes or no consent. In the aforementioned process... I think it is best for men to truly evaluate woman for demonstratng respect and willingness to be led by him and conversely a woman should be determining if she is truly DOES respect him and is willing to consent to being led by him over the course of her lifetime. God spoke it this way, yet see a plethora of "people" who decide to utilize some other approach... and it leads to disaster. Doing it "your way" pretty much obstructs God's influence on bringing together two suitable partners.
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meggars
Guest
To be fair, he asked what drives a relationship forward, not what starts one. As far as I can tell, the assumption is that one is already in a relationship in order for the question of what drives said relationship forward to apply.
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meggars
Guest
To be fair, he asked what drives a relationship forward, not what starts one. As far as I can tell, the assumption is that one is already in a relationship in order for the question of what drives said relationship forward to apply.
and on THAT note I would say that affection is more likely to drive an in-progress relationship forward than attraction. If attraction is all you have, chances are it's not going to last too long at all.
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zaoman32
Guest
Attraction can only take you so far in a relationship. You will not always be attracted to someone your with. That's why marriage is work. The only thing that propels relationships and marriages forward to last longer are acts of selflessness. Love in the bible is not just some feeling or emotion we get for someone that we keep forever. Love is a verb, something we do for someone else. In other words...Affection.
maybe not for everyone but its hard for me to start something with someone im not interested in.
To be fair, he asked what drives a relationship forward, not what starts one. As far as I can tell, the assumption is that one is already in a relationship in order for the question of what drives said relationship forward to apply.
Well then both...affection is definitely important. but I dont want my partner to just let herself go either. Ive seen it happen to friends where they married a 9 and 2 years later, no kids, no medical issues the 9 had become a like a 4. So affection needs to be there, and the attraction should stay as well within limits.
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GreenNnice
Guest
Yes, the guy is the initiator , the girl is the responder, in MOST cases, the Lord leads, we are to 'follow Me.' John 21:22
No, I mean what Naut said too, I am talking about the initial rules of liking someone, what drives you to LIKE themTo be fair, he asked what drives a relationship forward, not what starts one. As far as I can tell, the assumption is that one is already in a relationship in order for the question of what drives said relationship forward to apply.
What drives you to STAY liking them Attrraction or Affection ? Does the initial motivation, going forward, going to AFFECT your wantint to stay in (be attracted) the relationship ? Can your primary 'like' language be the death of the relationship? What IF you are going on 'attraction' and she is going on 'affection?'
And, just because I said that naut was on target, I already said in question form for naut to REALLY think over if attraction ALWAYS comes first, as naut says it does. Does it? <--- This, my response. And, in the above graph, I answer that question, as I see it, don't I
I like what you said, megs, you helped the thread flesh out more
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meggars
Guest
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meggars
Guest
what drives you to LIKE them
Well I don't think it's likely that the factor which initially draws a person to a relationship is going remain exactly the same as the relationship progresses. If:
1. Your initial attraction is what gets you into it, and that's all you have going forward but then one of you is horribly disfigured and unfortunately there's never been any affection along for the ride and that doesn't look to be changing any time soon, I guess it's all downhill from there.
2. You were initially drawn in by the affection, but didn't find the other person all THAT attractive to begin with, attraction can grow as the relationship progresses. If it doesn't though....I don't see things going anywhere either. Unless we're talking about 'friends ONLY' relationships, which I don't believe we are, affection alone will not be sufficient.
3. Best case scenario - You have both affection AND attraction right off the bat. In THIS case, the loss of all your limbs or the growth of a second head wouldn't necessarily change what you feel for the other person.
I like what you said, megs, you helped the thread flesh out more
Excellent...who knew stirring the pot could have beneficial side effects. I should cause trouble more often.
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BarlyGurl
Guest
Yes, the guy is the initiator , the girl is the responder, in MOST cases, the Lord leads, we are to 'follow Me.' John 21:22
Can your primary 'like' language be the death of the relationship? What IF you are going on 'attraction' and she is going on 'affection?'
I think it is of very little consequence...either/ or... because as a woman, being the responder, I am not going to respond positively to a man who demonstrates no ATTRACTION for me, nor am I going to cultivate FEELINGS of affection without the prerequisite initiating from him. During the INVESTIGATIVE Process where the dealbreakers should be discovered... as the acquaintance progresses... discovering commonalities ans not deal breakers should promote attraction and affection to develop.
And, just because I said that naut was on target, I already said in question form for naut to REALLY think over if attraction ALWAYS comes first, as naut says it does. Does it? <--- This, my response. And, in the above graph, I answer that question, as I see it, don't I
I can only answer for myself... in that NO it doesn't... I have experienced NO intitial attraction only to be struck by it after becoming acquainted with a man. Just as I have thought a man very attractive initially to discover my "book cover" sumations were entirely off.
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BarlyGurl
Guest
I wholly admitt I am a crummby typist and my keyboard is rebellious... please overlook... she added... without bothering to edit.