An inflated sense of beauty...

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Sorry, I know I'm digging up a thread but hey it was a very interesting topic and one I can relate to.

1) Do you face such situations in your daily life?
Yes! I grew up in a predominately Mexican area in South Texas. Mexican girls are very competitive with each other. Who has the longer hair? Who has whiter skin? Who's eyes are bigger? Who's chest or bum are larger? It's pretty crazy! lol I'm glad I'm not in that area anymore.
But I still feel a bit of pressure where I'm at and now that I'm older I honestly don't care as much. I just try to be healthy and look my best for myself. I don't care about competition with other women.

2) When are such comments on looks/physical attributes reasonable and when are they not? (For e.g. preference for life partners, etc.)
I would hope that my spouse finds me attractive. If he wants me to dress differently or try a different hair color, I would do it. But I wouldn't get a breast augmentation for him! LOL

3) How do you think men (in general) can help in your personal struggle against such stereotypes?
I don't think men are at fault. It's the women that are in competition with each other. Men will be happy as long as you're healthy and somewhat attractive...at least that's what I think. ;)

4) Addendum #1 - Do you find it worrying that some of the women featured in the video actually supported the argument that women must be more 'physically attractive'?

I'm not really worried, but more saddened that they feel that way. It saddens me to see so many beautiful women from all over the world think they are ugly or unattractive because of society's unattainable standards of beauty. Oh wow, I sound like a feminist. I'm not, though!!!

Anyways, women just need to see that they really are beautiful. I mean what's better: the person God has made? Or the person a human surgeon makes? I prefer authenticity. Now, I don't see anything wrong with wearing makeup or using heels, but something that is permanent (like cosmetic surgery) is a bit much for me.
 
MollyConnor said:
Sorry, I know I'm digging up a thread but hey it was a very interesting topic and one I can relate to.

1) Do you face such situations in your daily life?
Yes! I grew up in a predominately Mexican area in South Texas. Mexican girls are very competitive with each other. Who has the longer hair? Who has whiter skin? Who's eyes are bigger? Who's chest or bum are larger? It's pretty crazy! lol I'm glad I'm not in that area anymore.
But I still feel a bit of pressure where I'm at and now that I'm older I honestly don't care as much. I just try to be healthy and look my best for myself. I don't care about competition with other women.

2) When are such comments on looks/physical attributes reasonable and when are they not? (For e.g. preference for life partners, etc.)
I would hope that my spouse finds me attractive. If he wants me to dress differently or try a different hair color, I would do it. But I wouldn't get a breast augmentation for him! LOL

3) How do you think men (in general) can help in your personal struggle against such stereotypes?
I don't think men are at fault. It's the women that are in competition with each other. Men will be happy as long as you're healthy and somewhat attractive...at least that's what I think. ;)

4) Addendum #1 - Do you find it worrying that some of the women featured in the video actually supported the argument that women must be more 'physically attractive'?

I'm not really worried, but more saddened that they feel that way. It saddens me to see so many beautiful women from all over the world think they are ugly or unattractive because of society's unattainable standards of beauty. Oh wow, I sound like a feminist. I'm not, though!!!

Anyways, women just need to see that they really are beautiful. I mean what's better: the person God has made? Or the person a human surgeon makes? I prefer authenticity. Now, I don't see anything wrong with wearing makeup or using heels, but something that is permanent (like cosmetic surgery) is a bit much for me.
Click to expand...
When I was younger and not a christian, me and the guys I knew could spot fake breasts a mile away. And we didn't find it appealing. It was seen more as a testament to the woman's sense of insecurity about her looks. I heard that many women who had their breasts enlarged ended up committing suicide which is very sad. The surgery did not give them the boost in confidence and self-image that they were after.

NOTE: This doesn't include women who had implants put in after a mastectomy. It's only referring to those who wanted to supersize.
 
MOLLY, YOU GRAVE DIG... well, some threads (very few, but some) actually should be dug up occasionally, and this is one. :cool:
 
For me, a woman, or man for that matter, that makes it so obvious, either trying to or not, that appearence is a driving force, maybe THE driving fotce in their life, is unattractive. No matter how beautiful she or he may be. Yes, I will glance, maybe even do a quick visual study, but once it becomes clear to me that looks are their motivation, I get turned off.
 
You know this expectation is more less every where. Not only do women face this everyday "your not good enough unless you look like this". Men have the same problem. Especially when dating. I honestly believe that our society has perverted men and women into this unrealistic expectation of what we are supposed to look like. It has made dating extremely hard from the experiences I have had. Its a list of criteria that no one can fulfill. Its almost like a normal thinking human or one of high quality is non existent. Its either your too short, too tall, too skinny, too fat, and blah blah blah. What ever happened to getting to know someone with out superficial expectations? Sure the given fact that their must be some kind of attraction is a given and you can not make someone like you is obvious. It just makes me mad when I have to practically injure myself to maintain this expectation. I am not going to do it. And really no one else will or they soon get fed up with trying to maintain. Frustrated....
 
Anybody know what a corset is? Ever hear about women passing out back in the day because they were compressing their torsos so much they could not breathe? Anyone ever looked up how women were supposed to dress in King Arthur's time?

My point is none of this is new. It just came around again in a different fashion.
 
sassylady said:
I'm at work and my computer won't play a video, but since I'm in my 50's and 50 lbs overweight, I feel absolutely worthless and unattractive. Even though I carry the weight well. I've been told I am attractive, but I don't feel it because I'm nowhere near the ideal. I've even seen Christian dating sites where the men want a "slim, attractive woman". I wonder anymore if even a Christian man can appreciate a woman who has any value outside of her looks. I don't see things getting any better as more and more commercials and ads only show the best of the best physically.

Several years ago I had lost all my extra pre-pregnancy weight and was told I looked good. I dated three different men from church that I believe only dated me because I looked good. I got depressed and put my weight back on. I don't like being like this but if the right man comes along he will not care about that.

I know a lot of it is in my own mind, but when so many men only seem to notice the beautiful women, it's hard to hold out any hope of anybody noticing somebody who is not so great.
Click to expand...

Your beautiful heart CAN'T be replicated! THAT makes the rest of you beautiful, and I've no idea what you physically look like.
 
zeroturbulence said:
When I was younger and not a christian, me and the guys I knew could spot fake breasts a mile away. And we didn't find it appealing. It was seen more as a testament to the woman's sense of insecurity about her looks. I heard that many women who had their breasts enlarged ended up committing suicide which is very sad. The surgery did not give them the boost in confidence and self-image that they were after.

NOTE: This doesn't include women who had implants put in after a mastectomy. It's only referring to those who wanted to supersize.
Click to expand...

I wonder, can men spot fake ones nowadays?
That's really sad about the suicide rates, I didn't know. But it does make sense. Notice the women in the video were saying that by having surgery, it gives them hope for a better life and future...:(
 
i saw this thread yesterday, but i wasn't able to watch the video til this morning.

1) Do you face such situations in your daily life?
when i had low self esteem, i felt i couldn't get anything right. no one actually told me i needed to fit a certain mold, but from tv/ads/etc, i knew. now that i'm older and with a healthy self esteem, i don't care for the opinions of "you need to look this way."

2) When are such comments on looks/physical attributes reasonable and when are they not? (For e.g. preference for life partners, etc.)

my sweetie compliments me all the time, but he doesn't limit it to the physical. he always compliments my character as well. the rare times a guy (who is not my sweetie) has complimented me (physical) was always nice and respectful. "that shirt looks nice on you. that's a great haircut. that's a nice color youre wearing." i think these compliments are ok.

3) How do you think men (in general) can help in your personal struggle against such stereotypes?

i really don't have a way to answer this question, but it reminded me of something from high school. i had a really big crush on a friend. he and another classmate of ours would take a girl's seventeen magazine and go through each page pointing out who was hot and not. as i would look at the girls he considered hot, i saw how much i was NOT like them. each time, i would end up really sad because i felt he would never consider me attractive.

4) Addendum #1 - Do you find it worrying that some of the women featured in the video actually supported the argument that women must be more 'physically attractive'?

it made me sad because more than likely, they will never been fully happy. they'll always want to make changes.
 
The trouble with trying to measure up to a particular standard is..... IT'S ALL AN ILLUSION. We're brainwashed believing we have to overcome the world's standards or measure up to God's standard, when in fact we as Christians are IN CHRIST and right NOW have His identity.

Not everyone in the world has Christ in them, for we walk as strangers and aliens in a world that has been blinded to the truth. And those who trust in the flesh cannot recognize the true power of the good news of Christ. To you, Christ is wisdom and power and truth. We don't have to wait for the world to agree with this. We walk by faith, NOT by sight. :D
 
I am what I am and that's all that I am . Not everyone's gonna like me and that's ok... I don't like everyone myself. Am I trying to better myself? Yes I am. Is it to "get a man" or impress other women? No sir, it isnt. I'm ok with that. I was fearfully and wonderfully made... he just gave me a little extra stuffing ;)
 
100% human women, please.

The man in the video creeped me out. I'm not a violent man, but he made me quite angry.
 
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