Asking girls out

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Blue3Falcon

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So this thought has been on my mind but I couldn't really post it on facebook cause of some of my guy friends. That's why I thought I'd say it here! The thought of the day:

"Girls spend most of the time waiting for a guy to ask them out. So the question is....what are the guys waiting for?"

Nough said!
 
OceanGrl said:
Yes, we just sit by the phone hoping, praying, and waiting for that one phone call from Mr. Right. :p
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The problem is Mr. Right is married to Mrs. Right. (classic)

What am I waiting for? My divorce to be final, and some serious healing.
I still rather like the company of virtuous women, but the time between my divorce finalizing and me asking someone out is more likely to be measured in years than in weeks. Rightly so, I say.
 
a smile and a come over here look, the best would be if she said hello. :)
 
Blue3Falcon said:
So this thought has been on my mind but I couldn't really post it on facebook cause of some of my guy friends. That's why I thought I'd say it here! The thought of the day:

"Girls spend most of the time waiting for a guy to ask them out. So the question is....what are the guys waiting for?"

Nough said!
Click to expand...

Actually, a while back we covered this.

For me i don't believe in asking out random women. I first have to take a special notice. Then i observe for a bit to see if there's anything obvious that would turn me off. If not i will approach her, maybe in a group setting and try to get out there and have her notice me. Then i start approaching her personally. Then calling, then getting together as friends and becoming close til i eventually ask her out.

Though women talk about 'where are the guys' i feel confident if i tried anything with any of the regulars (females, guys, don't get your hopes up) in the forums here i would get turned down, even the ones that may have good things to say about me. (bypassing the 'distance' issue some people may have) Not really an encouragement to guys when women say 'i want a man' then don't like any of them. Or, as is commonly said 'where are all the REAL men' or 'where are all the GODLY guys'. And the group of Christian guys sitting there feel trashed. So now you know where the guys are.
 
Blue3Falcon said:
So this thought has been on my mind but I couldn't really post it on facebook cause of some of my guy friends. That's why I thought I'd say it here! The thought of the day:

"Girls spend most of the time waiting for a guy to ask them out. So the question is....what are the guys waiting for?"

Nough said!
Click to expand...
I think most guys are waiting for a sign from the girl that she likes him. And then the girls are wondering how they can let him know they like him without being forward or obvious, but still get the message across. Yea, its pretty much a stalemate.
 
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Maybe it's because I've only had two girlfriends and neither one turned me down right off the bat, but I have no reservations about asking a girl out. Though being interested is definitely key, and especially now I'm going to be slightly pickier about who I ask out. And yes, guys who complain about being single and being to shy or sheepish or whatever need to man up, get some back bone and actually make a move. Girls are less concerned with looks and more concerned with character and I think they'll find that more often than not the girl will give them at least one chance.
 
Girls are less concerned about looks?

Not in my experience based on every day common observation over a number of years. I'd be not very bright if I thought that.
 
Sometimes I come home and wish there was a man that would be calling me asking for a date. Of course not a total stranger, but someone I know who has taken notice of me. That would be a neat, sweet surprise. I'm a hopeful romantic:).
 
Aughhhh..... an aweful tight rope to walk.... perfer men to be straightforward. Even if when he first asks and maybe I don't seem interested, just the fact that he was so bold gets me to thinking, maybe I've over-looked this gentleman. Stirs my little heart<3. Yeah, there was a man I met one time that seemed boring as all get out, but he was the only man so far to be as bold as he was and it did get me thinking, but unfortunately he was too boring.
 
I think if you want to be approached more, you have to drop more hints. When I was a teenager I found out that my friend's cousin had a huge crush on me and really liked me.....I would have never guessed. I would try to talk to her and make her feel comfortable in the group but she was always really shy and wouldn't speak much. I was shocked when I found out she was interested.....had she just gave me a signal that she was interested I would have asked her out.

If you aren't being extra friendly to a guy or giving him any indication that you might be interested.....you shouldn't be surprised if you never get asked out. I've noticed a lot of girls in general try to hide their interest so they don't "give it away". That's a bad strategy. lol.
 
Yeah,I've never been into that coy,giggle -look away nonsense. If 2 people like each other,just get on with it. LOL I'm not saying be grossly overt about it. But that whole pretending yer' not interested stuff to me is just a lame version of manipulation,and I don't see how that's "of God". Then again..I'm an idiot.lol
 
I've never seen a Relationship start cold from scratch and last. Unless you are in a culture that dates people to get to know them, I don't see the point.

I think its a bit disingenuous. Don't get me wrong, I've done it before. I've arbitrarily asked someone out to find out if I actually liked them. Then I try to convince myself that maybe I do like them a little but, in the end I really can't. So I let them go. Rinse Repeat. Its part of the Culture where I grew up to ask out strangers from Church. When I was in Florida, where I learned how to date, this was not the case at all. People would not have lofty expectations for friendships, labels and spending time together.


If two people are friends and like each other, they will naturally grow together and closer. If two people spend all their time together because they like doing all the same things and don't need to be convinced or persuaded, they can learn to trust each other and eventually fall in love.


I think we have to value what a relationship is and the people we have them with. I don't think we need to be interviewing for the open position of Fiance.
 
zaoman32 said:
Maybe it's because I've only had two girlfriends and neither one turned me down right off the bat, but I have no reservations about asking a girl out. Though being interested is definitely key, and especially now I'm going to be slightly pickier about who I ask out. And yes, guys who complain about being single and being to shy or sheepish or whatever need to man up, get some back bone and actually make a move. Girls are less concerned with looks and more concerned with character and I think they'll find that more often than not the girl will give them at least one chance.
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I totaly agree!
 
I noticed a lot of people mentioning asking out someone you don't really know. I didn't mean that at all. I meant that I just notice a lot of great single guys at my church who know a lot of the girls really well and I find it suprising that a lot more of them aren't dating. You would think by now some of them would be interested in each other!
 
Blue3Falcon said:
I noticed a lot of people mentioning asking out someone you don't really know. I didn't mean that at all. I meant that I just notice a lot of great single guys at my church who know a lot of the girls really well and I find it suprising that a lot more of them aren't dating. You would think by now some of them would be interested in each other!
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Maybe we can take this as a good sign that guys are using their brains so they won't just rush straight into a relationship :)

I don't know any single girls at the moment, other than the ones on here, but I know for me it's a matter of looking at whether or not I can actually see myself being with someone 10, 20, 30 years down the road. As shallow as it may sound to I think the finding someone in "my league" is a part of it too. I'm not about to marry let alone start a relationship with girl who had a very wealthy upbringing and is used to more expensive tastes just because I know I won't be able to give her what she feels is normal, unless of course she's really willing to step down from that lifestyle
 
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