Can Being Kind really Bad thing?

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Cora

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Hi, my name is cora and im new here.

I love to help others with a boiling passion! So much so that I tend to blow off everything I need to do.
But for someone like me I have a hard time saying no to someone in need. Maybe thats why im working hard to become a nurse.
My friends tell me I need to be mean and learn to say no even my mother.
I have to much of a kind heart and I just cant really turn away someone in deep need.

Can being kind to my extent hurt me in the near future?
I want to know...
 
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. yes, you should be kind, but you need to know where to draws the line of being kind... It can hurt you if you let it hurt you in the things that you need to do... sometimes kindness is often too much taken for weakness.. Strvie for the kind of Kindness that Jesus wants for you to have... Put your heart in Him and you can't go wrong!!!I think you need a clearification on how to be kind tho or be like this...

LOL... saying no to your mother becasue your friends want you to do is a no... Ive done it.. not good, kinda ruins things...if yourheart gets in the way.. you have to get it straight... or it can hurt you... follow your heart... but dont let it cloud your head so much that you cant see. dont let it go too far.. get things straight is what you need to do!!! With yourself then help others...
 
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You don't have to be mean:) You just have to say NO whn you feel like that:)
I mean we all need to set some boundaries (in one or another way).
As for me- i am not so open to other ppl...well, except - friends and family.
I like to help people, but that doesn't mean that i let thm to use me. You have to understand what you really want- if you wanna help other ppl and you feel good about it-thn do it. But if you wanna help ppl-and you feel bad, bc you had no time to do things that you have to do-thn you must thnk about it.
And one more thing-i don't think that you can save the whole world:) Try to help (only) to some ppl, but do it regularly-and with pleasure:)

And-welcome to cc!:)

Jo.
 
Thank you, I'll work heart not to let my heart cloud my judgement.
 
It isn't being mean to say no. I think you are confusing kindness with always saying yes. It's great to help others, but you have to take care of yourself too, or else you will burn out.

Even boiling passions need a rest so we can be sharp and refreshed the next day and continue. :) (Cliche alert).... All good things in moderation. :p
 
Cora said:
Hi, my name is cora and im new here.

I love to help others with a boiling passion! So much so that I tend to blow off everything I need to do.
But for someone like me I have a hard time saying no to someone in need. Maybe thats why im working hard to become a nurse.
My friends tell me I need to be mean and learn to say no even my mother.
I have to much of a kind heart and I just cant really turn away someone in deep need.

Can being kind to my extent hurt me in the near future?
I want to know...
Click to expand...

Yes to your question. Sometimes people would use your kindness against you and take advantage of you.
However. Listen to the voice of God. Check with Him and pray if you wish to be kind and He shall bless you in it. Then if things don't work out the way you planned at least you know it is the way God planned and He will bless you for your kindness.

Always be meek and humble as you are now. That is your greatest strength.
 
O Cora, if all the world was like you!

(Go for it!)

(But be careful out there, darling.)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

(You've already had a male comment...but I couldn't help myself.)
 
The Bible says be kind. Jesus also told his disciples when doing ministry to be gentle as doves and wise as serpents. Don't be naive to put yourself in danger, but also, let your kindness shine the light of Jesus. Kindness is a fruit of the Spirit that comes from abiding in God, our True Vine. It requires discernment to know the difference. Pray for wisdom. James 1 says all who pray for wisdom will find it.
 
Cora said:
Hi, my name is cora and im new here.

I love to help others with a boiling passion! So much so that I tend to blow off everything I need to do.
But for someone like me I have a hard time saying no to someone in need. Maybe thats why im working hard to become a nurse.
My friends tell me I need to be mean and learn to say no even my mother.
I have to much of a kind heart and I just cant really turn away someone in deep need.

Can being kind to my extent hurt me in the near future?
I want to know...
Click to expand...

Wow you're the kind of woman that my heart just melts for. Don't ever change, Cora! God bless you.
 
Kindness is a great thing. Being mean is never good. Saying no IS good sometimes. Many people who are 'too kind' often end up hurt, and burned out because they can't so no, even when they need to. We all need to receive as well as give.
So no, don't be mean, but Do learn how to say no. Learn how to be cautious. Be aware of when you need to refresh yourself. No matter how good you intentions are, if you give to much of yourself, what you give may be more of a detriment.
 
Cora, you asked if being kind to that extent could hurt you in the future, and yes, I think it could. Of course I think it's great that you have a kind heart! My concern is that you will be taken advantage of. I also worry about your self esteem--often if a person feels like they can never say no, it's because they feel a compulsion to make others happy so that they can feel worthwhile. Sometimes saying "yes" can be bad for others too--sometimes it's better to let people "learn the hard way" for their own good.

Also, if and when you enter into a serious relationship it will be very important that you know where you end and your partner begins--basically boundaries. If you do everything he asks you will eventually become resentful. Even if he is the most unselfish person in the world (and trust me, he won't be--every guy is selfish sometimes) there will be times when you will have to speak up for yourself to get what you need.

I am guessing you avoid conflict at every cost? I know it makes you happy to make others happy, and that's a good thing! But I promise the world won't end if you tell someone you "just can't this time" or "I would love to help but..." or "I don't like it when you..." or even "I need..." (Do you ever ask for what YOU need Cora??) People are very resiliant and their life will not be over if you turn them down or ask THEM for a little help once in awhile. But if you don't learn to balance that kindness with self-care, I'm afraid for your mental happiness.

Be blessed

Be blessed.
 
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