~Chuckle for the Day~

[Bingo]

Two old men are sitting in a bar.

One of them looks at the other & says

“You look familiar… where you from?”

The second old man replies “Ireland”

The first old man looks astonished & says

” No way I’m from Ireland myself, what a small world!”

The second old man then looks at the first “What city?”

The first old man says “Dublin?”

The second old man looks astonished

“No way I’m from Dublin myself! What a small world.”

The first man looks at the second old man “What school you go to?”

The second old man replies

“Saint Mary’s class of 89”

The first old man is absolutely baffled

” NO WAY Saint Mary’s class of 89 myself! What a small world!”

At this point, another man comes into the bar & says to the bartender

“Hey, Joe! Anything interesting going on?”

The bartender says

“Not really… but the Murphy twins are drunk again.”

(copied from the World Wide Web)

 

[Bingo]

**When Forest Gump died, he stood in front of St. Peters at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said “welcome, Forest. We’ve heard a lot about you. “he continued, Unfortunately, it getting pretty crowded up here and we find that we now have to give people an entrance examination before we let them in.” “okay, said Forest. “I hope it’s not too hard. I’ve already been through a test. My momma used to say, “Life is like a final exam.

It’s hard.” “Yes, Forest, I know. But this test is only three questions. Here they are.” 1) Which two days of the week begin with the letter ‘T’?” 2) How many seconds are in a year? 3) What is God’s first name? “Well, sir,” said Forest, “The first one is easy. Which two days of the week begin with the letter ‘T’? Today and Tomorrow.” St. Peter looked surprised and said, “Well, that wasn’t the answer I was looking for, but you have a point. I give you credit for that answer.”

“The next question, said Forest, “How many seconds are in a year? Twelve.” “Twelve?” said St Peter, surprised and confused. “Yes, sir. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd …” St. Peter interrupted him. “I see what you mean. I’ll have to give you credit for that one, too.”

“And the last question,” said Forest, “What is God first name? It Andy.” “Andy?” said St. Peter, in shock. “How did you come up with ‘Andy’?” “I learned it in church. We used to sing about it.” Forest broke into song, “Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me I am His own.” St. Peter opened the gate to heaven and said “Run, Forest, Run!”
(copied from the World Wide Web)

 

[Bible_Locket]

Appreciate the little things.Give a short person a hug.​

 

[Kojikun]

 

[Bible_Locket]

View attachment 295547

Reminds me of Representative AOC, who once said Elon Musk could research ways to stop global warming by studying the sun. When asked how he could avoid those ships being insinerated by solar energy,she said he'd just have to send them at night.
That's supposedly a urban myth,but with her it's quite possible she said something similar.

 

[Bible_Locket]

 

[Kojikun]

 

[Bingo]

Morris the loudmouth mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon Dr. Michael DeBakey, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his Mercedes.

Morris shouted across the garage, "Hey DeBakey! Is dat you? Come on ova' here a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where Morris the mechanic was working on the car.

Morris straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, "So Mr. Fancy Doctor, look at dis here work. I also open hearts, take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish dis baby will purr like a kitten. So how come you get da big bucks, when you an' me is doing basically da same work?"

Dr. DeBakey leaned over and whispered to Morris the loudmouth mechanic. "Try doing it with the engine running."