Concubines

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JFSurvivor

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2015
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In the old testament some very godly men had concubines. This makes no sense to me because I thought sex was supposed to be between one man and one wife. I know that a lot of godly men also had more than one wife but that also doesn't make sense like the concubine thing. My boyfriend says that it's because they were human and fallen. Thoughts?
 
In the old testament some very godly men had concubines. This makes no sense to me because I thought sex was supposed to be between one man and one wife. I know that a lot of godly men also had more than one wife but that also doesn't make sense like the concubine thing. My boyfriend says that it's because they were human and fallen. Thoughts?

Good question, my sister. It's a confusing one, that's for sure. The short answer is that marriage (and in turn sex) were designed by God for a husband and his wife, not any other coupling. The actions of people like King David and his son, King Solomon weren't approved by God, but He did allow them. I'm not sure why God was so faithful to these men. Or really how He puts up with any of us. But I'm glad He does. They were certainly faithful to God in ever other facet of their lives, but they were rather horny. The important thing to remember is that the Bible is truth and it records history as it happened. Therefore, not every action therein is sanctioned by God. Did you know that the Bible is the only ancient Near Eastern writing to paint its heroes in a realistic light (warts and all)? No white-washing here! Just a very clear picture of fallen humanity and their desperate need for a Saviour.
 
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Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubine and God would of gave him more if he wasn't happy. Or was that the other guy hmmmmm

God was cool with it, it didn't bother him

He just didn't want men turnig away from Him because the other women worshiped other gods.
 
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In the old testament some very godly men had concubines. This makes no sense to me because I thought sex was supposed to be between one man and one wife. I know that a lot of godly men also had more than one wife but that also doesn't make sense like the concubine thing. My boyfriend says that it's because they were human and fallen. Thoughts?

So this presents a couple of topics:

Why concubinage? (yeah...it's a world...cool, eh?) and
What does it mean to be "a Godly man?"

I'm going to tackle the first one here (and maybe the second in a later post).

Concubinage is basically a man and woman (women) living together without the formality of marriage. (Today we call it "living together" or in some cases "common law marriage").

The taking of concubines was basically a cultural practice. It's essentially based on a system of women being objects and lacking agency. So, basically, you belonged to your father and then your husband. There was no real access to education, employment, or independence. But what happens if your father dies and you're not married? Now you have to rely on a male relative to take care of you--brother, uncle, etc. OR maybe you'd be taken in by another man as a sort of quasi-wife. You don't have the status of a wife, but you perform some of the same functions.

Additionally, the taking of concubines existed for political reasons. Solomon, for example, had many concubines (and wives, for that matter). All of those women were under his financial care (which, btw, lets you know how significantly he was rollin' :) ). However, many of the alliances were made for political reasons. Because women were objects that belonged to their fathers, they could be given (with or without consent) to men for any number of reasons (the giving of Leah to marry Jacob, the offer of Lot's daughters to the men, etc.)

I'm sure there was also a certain amount of concubinage that was a result of "I'm tired of my wife and want someone new," in addition to people who just lived together without actually being married (like the Woman at the Well).

The deal with being a concubine (then and now) is that while you might perform some wifely duties, you lacked the social, financial, etc. status of a legal wife.

All of this (initially) came from cultural philosophies that didn't view women as equal to men and, therefore, didn't allow women the same opportunities.

Now, (ironically), it's the very idea of agency that has some women choosing to be a concubine rather than a wife. What I mean is, now that women have access to education, job opportunities, etc., many are choosing to get involved in relationships that don't seem as "heavy" or "locked-in" or "committed" as marriage. So, concubinage lives on. :)
 
This question is more often posed by critics of God than those who profess to know Him but it is important to have an answer.

God designed marriage for one man and one woman. God winked at the sin of concubines in old times but God never approved of it. The child of Abraham with Hagar was not the child of the promise.

Given the mess we have today with promiscuity in our society it becomes easy to see why God has moved the hearts of men away from concubines as a societal norm. God has not blessed concubines but there may be an argument that they kept many women from an even worse existence in the early times of mans history.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
It shows that even despite our sinful nature God still loves us and forgives us. As Christians we have a greater witness and have the Holy Spirit dwelling with our soul which makes such acts of rebellion impossible for the believer to reconcile, sin no longer having power over us in Christ.

just a thought.
 
In the old testament some very godly men had concubines. This makes no sense to me because I thought sex was supposed to be between one man and one wife. I know that a lot of godly men also had more than one wife but that also doesn't make sense like the concubine thing. My boyfriend says that it's because they were human and fallen. Thoughts?

God was cool with it, it didn't bother him

So, the question is then, what does it mean to be "a Godly man."

It's a mistake to presume that because the bible doesn't overtly address a culturally adopted system (concubinage, slavery, women as objects, etc.) that God is okay with it.

There are lots of clear examples of how destructive having concubines and polygamous marriages were to all the major families in the bible--Hagar and Ishmael's struggles, Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers, the rape of Tamar by Abnom, Solomon worshipping foreign gods, etc.

So, why do we consider certain men in the bible "Godly" even though they continually sinned and engaged with sinful systems?

It has nothing to do with good or bad. (And, what I consider good/bad is going to be based on my own philosophies, acculturation, life-experience, interpretation of scripture, etc.) If you think about it, we're all a mixture of good and bad. The HUMAN thing involves focusing on one more than the other. We look at another person and highlight their bad behavior and act like it overshadows any good behavior, so I call them "bad." OR We look at a person and highlight their good behavior and act like it overshadows their bad behavior, so I call the "good."

So you end up with scenarios like: A person lives a decent life, has a spouse and children, but then commits adultery. Oh, no, adultery is AWFUL, it's on my list of REALLY BAD. So, now I switch this person in my head from the good list to the bad list.

OR

A person engages in a destructive behavior, like lying, but they also do a lot of good--giving to the poor, serving others, being loving to others, etc. Oh, I value SERVING OTHERS, that's on my list of VERY GOOD. So, I ignore, or minimize the lying of this person and they get to stay on my good list.

People love categorizing and sorting out, but again, the deal is, we are ALL a mixture of good and bad. The only way to adequately sort people into good and bad is to ignore some parts and emphasize others.

But God circumvents all of this. Which, you know, is one of the reasons I love God.

He doesn't make himself part of our human sorting system.

In other words, Godliness is a statement about the work of God in a person's life, not about their "good" outweighing their "bad."

Being GODLY means you seek after God. That you care about being connected to God and you do things that will establish and maintain this connection.

Abraham had faith...God counted it as righteousness. Abraham wasn't righteous, but he believed God, so God sorted him out. David was a man after God's own heart. When confronted with his sin, by Nathan, he repented and sought God...God sorted him out. The Woman at the Well was open with Jesus about her various "husbands," and became an evangelist for him, when Jesus sorted her out.

In the end, (and at the possible expense of sounding cheesy)...

It's not about being good. It's about being God's.