Yes maam, I do want to be my future husbands first wife and for him to be my first husband. I will pray for you and your situation, I hope you will do the same for me. I pray that God will give you wisdom on what you need to do concerning your marriage. We often quote the scripture that says, what God has joined together, let no man put asunder, but I don't believe that God has joined and sanctified every marriage, if that were so then how could two men or women be joined together in marriage to one another and it be of God, there are also children who in certain countries at the age of 8 are forced to marry an adult, would this be of God as well. It is my oppinion that sometimes when we don't wait on God for the mate that he has for us, we end up joining ourselves to another person that may be within his permissive will but not the divine will of God. As I said this is just an expression of my own oppinion and I may stand to be corrected. I know and trust that God will lead you in your decision, we often put things on God that we chose for ourselves, but with that being said,, let us look to the hills from which cometh our help for ALL of our help comes from the lord. May the peace of God be with you and your family, that surpasseth all understanding. God bless you..