i am with a friend now, whom for the first time in a year tried and it went weird almost instantly. so this is like i am reading something she would have posted earlier this week!
i think we all get tired of trying and getting slapped down, or not finding what it is that satisfies the needs we have, no matter how reasonable those needs are.
with my friend, whom i had posted on the prayer area a few days ago, it is getting her to realize that not everyone is evil, not everyone is out to get her - it doesn't help when in the safety of a group of Christians, she gets smacked for no reason. But, other people have their problems too and we may not even know what they are. Certainly, I have no clue what my friend did wrong to have her new friend suddenly "disappear".
and my friend, perhaps a bit like you as well, has to learn to be satisfied with whom they are and understand that they do have something to offer others, but perhaps they are looking in the wrong places or for the wrong reasons. for my friend, she really needs to stick with just Christians she meets in person and avoid the internet friendships, because you really can not know someone through mere words. internet Q&A is great, she has to not put any more significance into words appearing on her screen. for her, not reading between the lines is important.
of course, you have my prayers, depression is awful to go through. there are some mighty good psalms dealing with the majasty of God to consider and perhaps lift your spirits! Like 19 and 20.....