Does true love ever really fade?

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Jullianna

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Emily's how to get over someone thread made me wonder whether we ever truly "get over" someone we truly love.

What do you do think? Do we?
Or do we suppress it somehow?
Does it change to something else?
If so, was it ever really love in the first place or just infatuation?
 
I don't think I ever was with someone who I truly loved. But maybe that's just it? At the time and shortly after the breakup, we still love them (or believed that we love them), but with time, you begin to realize that it wasn't love? Maybe not in every case, but I gotta wonder. Atleast in my case, there were a few guys that I realized down the road it wasn't actually love. (Man am I negative or what!?)
 
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very good post Jullianna :)

I'm a romantic at heart. I'm very passionate about nearly everything I have interest in, the bible, and music mostly. My situation with girls isn't much different. I wear my heart on my sleeve and don't hold back my feelings, and therefore I get myself emotionally attached, not always in a romantic way, but when it is romantic it is that much stronger.

can we get over "being in love" with someone? Yes. But for me, I still remember the heightened emotions and happiness I had in a relationship. I've only had two girlfriends, but looking back on those, as well as a close friendship I had with another girl (not romantic in anyway), it's easy to remember the good times, and how wonderful things were, and though it seems like the love is just suppressed, I think it's more just remembering what the good times felt like, and they were pretty awesome.

Love to me is more of a choice, infatuation to me is really not much different than lusting after someone. Infatuation has to do more with your emotions, and your wants, than the other persons. Love is completely selfless and non-self seeking. We choose to love somebody, we choose to lay our lives down. Never once in the bible is love mentioned as an emotion.
 
Jullianna said:
Emily's how to get over someone thread made me wonder whether we ever truly "get over" someone we truly love.

What do you do think? Do we?
Or do we suppress it somehow?
Does it change to something else?
If so, was it ever really love in the first place or just infatuation?
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I don't know about true love but I used to have this huge crush on this girl when I was in grade school and it remained through high school too (yes she knew about it but didn't feel the same). When I moved away I lost complete contact with her and then over 20 years later I find her on facebook and she hasn't even changed. She works as an entertainer and dancer so she has kept herself in amazing shape and hasn't really seem to have aged, but alas my crush on her has faded. It's probably because I've changed.
 
Well the one and only girl in my life I have ever said I love you to, and she said it back...she ended that easily enough.
She simply looked me in the eye one day and said ''You cannot be angry at me because you love me''...as if loving someone is a license for letting them treat you like crap.

Yes...the sun finally broke through the clouds then and I no longer felt anything.

If someone returned your love then I don't think you will ever lose it...but if you still love someone years later who treated you badly....you were a sucker not a lover.
 
djness said:
Well the one and only girl in my life I have ever said I love you to, and she said it back...she ended that easily enough.
She simply looked me in the eye one day and said ''You cannot be angry at me because you love me''...as if loving someone is a license for letting them treat you like crap.

Yes...the sun finally broke through the clouds then and I no longer felt anything.

If someone returned your love then I don't think you will ever lose it...but if you still love someone years later who treated you badly....you were a sucker not a lover.
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I want to like this a million times
 
"True love"

Does "true love" fade?

I think it's like pictures that were taken before these fancy digital cameras.

You can see a picture that's been sitting in a box for 20...30..40 years.
You see that it's faded.
But you still see the distinct faces, and the distinct memories.

In a way past loves, their impact fades much like those pictures, but part of it still remains in the shoebox of our heart.
 
Hi Jullianna!

Does true love ever fade? Nice question.

I consider that love is one of the fruits of the Spirit. Love of every form , within the boundaries God has given us, I consider as a divine treasure for us. I cherish the concept of love, (I am not referring to the unacceptable versions of love such as fornication,etc) , but I believe love is a gift to the receiver and its a privilege to the giver. If our love is rooted in Christ ,I believe when our stock of love for others gets emptied we can ask God to refill us and pour in us His love so that we can continue representing His love for others , and continue to spread light of God through us.

I hope someday I will find someone who has a loving heart to love me, and has a small empty room in his heart where I can fill my love for him ,but it all must be in accordance to the will of God . Amen.



 
True love would have to be defined first. I think it means different things to different people. To me, true love is forever. It does not die. It can flicker and go through rough periods, but it never dies. Anything short of that is not true love by my definition. Rather it's another kind of love.

Of course God is the only one who can love perfectly, so there is no flickering of His love even. It's always strong and true.
 
niceguyJ said:
True love would have to be defined first. I think it means different things to different people. To me, true love is forever. It does not die. It can flicker and go through rough periods, but it never dies. Anything short of that is not true love by my definition. Rather it's another kind of love.

Of course God is the only one who can love perfectly, so there is no flickering of His love even. It's always strong and true.
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I was just thinking about that, because if someone can "fall out of" true love, well to me that would make me scared to get married, to think that they could eventually "un-love" me. I think zaoman brings up a good point, love is way more than just an emotion.

I've never had to get over anyone, I've never dated or been in love. I went through a situation last summer that felt like a breakup (not with a boy, it was actually with a ministry, of all things. Long-ish, painful story). I had poured my heart, soul, and body (long, hard days) into it for months and suddenly it was all gone. 6 months later and I'm still not healed. Then again, the way it ended cut into the most sensitive parts of my being. Because of that experience, I hope that the first boy I date is the one I marry. That's sort of a unrealistic expectation to have, but it's one that I hope for. I really don't know how I'd handle a breakup, considering how long it's taken me to heal from something that wasn't even romantic, ha.

I don't think you really "get over" things. I think that you can move past them. I actually prefer that phrase, because for me, "getting over" something implies that you forget that it happened, that it will never affect you (positively or negatively) again. Love/being with someone (even friendships, though I know that being romantically involvement goes deeper than friendships) gets to us at such a deep, intimate level that I think at some level, it stays with us for a really long time, if not forever. Does that mean you think about it every day or it affects your every thought? No. But it has changed you as a person, even if it's in just a small way.
 
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Than Jesus is a sucker right? Because the Bible says "For God so loved the world" John 3:16, and then it says, "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first." John 15:18. Malachi 3:6 says, "I the Lord do not change." So Jesus loved the world. The world hated him. They treated him so crappy they put him on a cross even though he was innocent, and because he never changes but is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8), he still loves this world that did him so wrong even though it has been about 2,000 years since the crucifixion at Golgotha. No my friend, "love never fails" (1 Corinthians 13:8).
 
alienambassador said:
Than Jesus is a sucker right? Because the Bible says "For God so loved the world" John 3:16, and then it says, "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first." John 15:18. Malachi 3:6 says, "I the Lord do not change." So Jesus loved the world. The world hated him. They treated him so crappy they put him on a cross even though he was innocent, and because he never changes but is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8), he still loves this world that did him so wrong even though it has been about 2,000 years since the crucifixion at Golgotha. No my friend, "love never fails" (1 Corinthians 13:8).
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Thank you. You took the words right out of my mouth!
 
God IS love. He never fails, and neither does Love. I don't believe you "get over" love because I subscribe to the notion that love is not an emotion, but a choice/action/way of life. I believe you can cease to love someone, that is, you can cease to be loving towards them, but that is a choice you make. the original question seems to be getting at the emotional side of things, which I believe to be infatuation. Personally I don't see anything wrong with infatuation as long as it is in the context of love. To delight in the person you love is good and right. :)
I think it's possible to lose those feelings of delight, which is probably what is meant by "falling out of love".

We're all sinners, but I think that if two fallen sinners come together and are relying on the strength of Christ to love one another just like Christ loves us all, that's the closest we can get to true love. :) And that type of love is capable of lasting a lifetime, in which case you wouldn't need to "get over it", would you?
 
I more or less touched on this in Emily's thread.

It doesn't ever fade if it ever existed there in the first place. It changes as you walk through life, metastasizing in a way. Admiration is still a factor, but it ceases to be animated by a passionate and romantic character if the lost love is a healthy one.
We just accept, learn, and walk away new and better people.

I think it is loosely illustrative of the sort of love God has for people. I really wish I could adore and appreciate everyone the way I adore and appreciate her as I do now.
 
Ritter said:
I more or less touched on this in Emily's thread.

It doesn't ever fade if it ever existed there in the first place. It changes as you walk through life, metastasizing in a way. Admiration is still a factor, but it ceases to be animated by a passionate and romantic character if the lost love is a healthy one.
We just accept, learn, and walk away new and better people.

I think it is loosely illustrative of the sort of love God has for people. I really wish I could adore and appreciate everyone the way I adore and appreciate her as I do now.
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And yet again Ritter hits a homerun :rolleyes: Isn't this guy ever wrong?
 
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