Encouragment for my sister

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mnicole

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My sister just found out that her husband who is a former assistant pastor has been having a two year long relationship with his ex and got her pregnant. He has been stringing my sister along for the past two years telling her he wants to work on his marriage but then behind her back he was writing emails to his ex telling her he wanted to marry her when he is already married.

My sister has finally decided to get a divorce because she cannot take his abuse anymore. She has three kids from him 9,8,6, she loves him a lot they have been married for 10 years and this is really hard for her to take. What is a good scripture or book for her to read that will help her in this time of need.

I am so mixed with emotion I'm trying my best to be spiritual and pray with her and not let my flesh and my feelings show cause i know that will only make it worse. our family can use some prayers and guidance any will do.


Thank you and God bless.
 
i read a really good book recently that told us to be committed to loving the person not the marriage. that we should act in a manner that leads others towards God not condoning sin, not holding anger and unfogiveness in our hearts but just leaving it in God's hands. to warns against 3 time of people: 1. evil person who seem nice on the surface but will likely do evil and harm others because they enjoy it 2. the fool who has the outer trappings of religions but in their heart they do not have deep in the scriputre or the conviction of the Holy spirit to keep them from evil. or something like that anyway she might find comfort in reading that:


Bold love for you marriage by Dan Allender

I know she is filling for divorce and the seperation might bring him to his sense, but without God it is unlikely. She must remember she was first and foremost a bride of Christ and she should remember God's love for her

YouTube - God's love letter

and that God wants her to be stronger in her Faith and walk with Him

YouTube - Mandisa - Stronger

the book talks about setting boundaries in relationships with love and understanding and consequences that is what God wants us to do because that is what He does for us.

ANother book i'm studying with a small women's group right now is by a local author

Moving in Fatih: taking off the robes by Jennifer Kostyal

she talks about how women have these rags of unforgiveness, unworthiness, etc that we need to remove from our hearts and minds and lay on the altar of God and remember to pick up the robes that God has made for us. the Robes of righteousness. if she would like she can message me about either books or just to talk. I will pray for her and her family, especially the children who will be confused. I pray they do not harbor bitterness and resentment for actions of their father for he has sinned and is in need of prayer for grace that he confesses, truly repents and turns from his path which will lead to death and destruction of his life, home, and family.

Dear Lord we pray for everyone who has been betrayed by people pretending to be righteous but falls into the snares of the devil. We pray they learn to forgive and let YOU take vengeance and instead for them to do as Jesus taught us: to forgive and pray for them. let them remember that Forgiveness does not mean to continue letting them abuse them but to set firm boundaries with love in their hearts. let them have the strength to love BOLDly and as you love. In Jesus name we pray, Amen
 
mnicole said:
My sister just found out that her husband who is a former assistant pastor has been having a two year long relationship with his ex and got her pregnant. He has been stringing my sister along for the past two years telling her he wants to work on his marriage but then behind her back he was writing emails to his ex telling her he wanted to marry her when he is already married.

My sister has finally decided to get a divorce because she cannot take his abuse anymore. She has three kids from him 9,8,6, she loves him a lot they have been married for 10 years and this is really hard for her to take. What is a good scripture or book for her to read that will help her in this time of need.

I am so mixed with emotion I'm trying my best to be spiritual and pray with her and not let my flesh and my feelings show cause i know that will only make it worse. our family can use some prayers and guidance any will do.


Thank you and God bless.
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Nicole ....it's okay to let your feelings show. I would even say that it would be unhealthy for you and your family, especially your sister to keep their feelings bottled up inside. What she is experiencing is a betrayal of the worst kind and she has every right to feel the anger and hurt associated with her husbands behaviour. Your family's job is to be an emotional support her and the kids. I can tell you that if it were one of my daughters in this position, I would strongly encourage them to take steps to move forward in their life ....... without plans or the hope that the husband will "change". If somebody can carry on an affair like he has with all of the deception involved, they have no desire to change. They are capable only of fulfilling the things that they want for themselves. Sad but true. Your sister and every woman or person in a marriage deserves much better than this. And there are situations in life where it is incumbent upon ourselves to insist that we receive as much. Sadly, this is one of those scenario's. It is always heartbreaking to read posts such as this ...... for everybody involved. But sometimes we are given no choice. It is my prayer that your sister and her children experience God's tender love throughout this ordeal. But even more than this, I pray that they realize and quickly come to terms with the reality that their husband and father must shoulder the responsibility for his own actions. Your sister and the kids will undoubtedly question what "role" or "responsibility" they had in all of this. It is a natural thing to occur whenever these situations take place. Most often, they don't even realize they are doing it. Give them constant reassurance of their worthiness of being loved. This is the greatest thing you can presently do for them. God bless you and all of your family.
 
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