For laughs - What you Don’t Want to Hear On A First Date

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-So, you ready to do shots? I woke up with the WORST hangover this morning.
-You should check out this new eastern religion I'm studying up on!
-Oh that Jesus guy, he was some hippie right?

Only one statement says it all.
 
-So, you ready to do shots? I woke up with the WORST hangover this morning.
-You should check out this new eastern religion I'm studying up on!
-Oh that Jesus guy, he was some hippie right?

Only one statement says it all.
I could probably get behind the shots idea
 
once i finish up the anger management classes, my weekends will be all yours.

my mother and i are very close. we like to hang out together at least once a week while she does my laundry.

so where was i? oh yeah, so after my marriage ended in a shambles, i pretty much gave up on life. but that was last week. i'm doing much better today!
 
I could probably get behind the shots idea


Whatever floats your boat.

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"you remind me of my husband. you should meet him sometime"

That reminds me of this time I was in line to return something at walmart. This pretty girl in a dress walks up to me and tells me I look like Fonzi (Not that I mind being compared to the Fonz, but for those who have seen me on cam.....I look nothing like Fonzie") she continues to make an effort to keep the conversation going, She's coming off as really flirty......then she mentions her husband. I'm like "What is this?.....I don't even......"
 
True Story...

Once on a first date a girl told me she just got out of jail for stabbing an abusive guy with a fork.

I remember thinking, "A fork... hmmm... so she's the creative type. That's a plus."

: )
 
1. You 'gonna eat that?
2. I forgot to use my dandruff shampoo earlier.
3. Oh, crap!! It's my ex wife!
 
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
Give me a minute; it's my buddy.
...texting.

 
Okay, you were saying?
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
Hold on; it's my buddy again.
...texting.

 
Okay, sorry for that. He's so curious.
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
LOL. He says he wants to take you out on a date...