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NorrinRadd
Guest
I haven't worked in over 2 years. I still have nightmares regarding work. It's not that I was a soldier, or some other job that messed with my head. My head was messed up way before that. It's hard to even explain myself. I don't like leaving the house. I feel like a deadbeat husband because I'm not really contributing to my family's needs. I try to encourage others here on CC. I don't know what God wants me to do. I've tried applying for various jobs but have been unsuccessful. Actually the thought of working again makes me feel sick. I feel wrung out, spent, no fuel in the tank, rusted out and in a heap. I've made it further then I thought I would though. I just don't know what God expects of me. I know I am His chosen, but in life I feel frozen, stuck, directionless, nothing on the radar except lethargy caused by the meds I'm on. But without those meds I'm a raging lunatic. I need the meds and they are heaven sent. No, I am not interested in naturopathic remedies. There's no scientific body of evidence stating their efficacy. I will end this vent by saying I am sure of my salvation and know of Whom I am loved. But we all know this short life is not void of testing, trials and tribulation.