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Ok this happened more than 10 years ago - long before I became a christian. I was having a bad day at work and it was a time in my life when I was really tired of living. It seemed like all I ever had were bad days. Something wierd happened on my way home from work that made me really angry inside because I felt like I was being spiritually attacked and it had been going on for several days. I always believed in God and the spirit realm. Anyway, when I got home I was so upset and just wanted the world to end. I cried and shouted into my pillow asking God why he was being so unfair to me and I asked him to please kill me. Actually, I yelled into my pillow with all my strength asking God to please kill me. Right after I did this, I suddenly felt a warm energy come over me. Its hard to explain. It started in my legs and moved up to my head and it felt like a warm, vibrating energy and when it hit me I felt this amazing sense of calm and peace like I had never felt before...or since. I now believe it was either the hand of Jesus comforting me or the Holy Spirit. It was so shocking that I just lay there with my eyes open for several minutes wondering, "What in the world did I just experience?? Was that God? That had to be God!" From then on I felt like there was definitely someone out there who cares for me. Someone I can't see, but is very very real.
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God's grace?
First, thank you Zer for sharing! That gave me goosebumps.
In 2004, I was in ICU for 18 hours for an attempted suicide that would have worked had my friend not found me. I was in the psychiatric ward after that for 2 weeks and still came out it resentful that I was living. I had known God before, but for a myriad of reasons had given up. Three months later, I found out I was pregnant with my son. God's grace has not only given me the strength to live for me, but for him as well. And it wasn't by my power that I am able to raise him, but by His power. And I'm grateful every single day that I get that new lease on life that I had been searching for.
Joshua was born on one year to the date of my survival. I don't believe in coincidence.
First, thank you Zer for sharing! That gave me goosebumps.
In 2004, I was in ICU for 18 hours for an attempted suicide that would have worked had my friend not found me. I was in the psychiatric ward after that for 2 weeks and still came out it resentful that I was living. I had known God before, but for a myriad of reasons had given up. Three months later, I found out I was pregnant with my son. God's grace has not only given me the strength to live for me, but for him as well. And it wasn't by my power that I am able to raise him, but by His power. And I'm grateful every single day that I get that new lease on life that I had been searching for.
Joshua was born on one year to the date of my survival. I don't believe in coincidence.
G
----(Sensation)al, zere. Reminds of a song we sing in church: He was there all the time. 
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allfunfor, God worked in the same kind of way for my sister-- nearly destroyed by the fun-loving, 'high,' life she chose, God entered in and just took over. In the midst of heavy substance abuse and beating abuse, she was made pregnant. Her beau couldn't't change, but sis did, definitely changed her life soo much. God is so good.
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allfunfor, God worked in the same kind of way for my sister-- nearly destroyed by the fun-loving, 'high,' life she chose, God entered in and just took over. In the midst of heavy substance abuse and beating abuse, she was made pregnant. Her beau couldn't't change, but sis did, definitely changed her life soo much. God is so good.