So...the past few days or so, I've been so uneasy, so on edge, snappy, ill, not myself, and down a lot, and not to mention conviction and all that.
However, just before getting on here, I was listening to ''The Heart Of Worship'', and''Sin Died Here''....there's a part in Sin Died Here that says ''a heart so unclean, made spotless'' and I said that's me, oh God I have to do this, I have to go back to God. I hadn't really totally ''fallen away'' or ''left'' God, I just wasn't where I should be with Him. I was caught up in sin, and the conviction/guilt of it.
I just finally literally fell to my knees, and was face down on the floor, with my hands on my head, I didn't know what to do, say, or anything...then I folded my hands, in front of me, and rested my head on my arms....and I cried and cried, begging God to forgive me.
To help me, I can't do this anymore, and so I told Him, ''Father God, I'm comming back, I can't do this, I'm comming back''.
I've realized how bad I messed up, and I kept praying daily, God deliver me from the sin, the addiction to a specific one, as I need and want to be dead to sin, not in it.it's odd to most folks to hear ''addiction to a sin'' but that's JUST what it was.
I'm back to where I need to be, ''the slate has been wipped clean'' and I know that He will NEVER leave or forsake me, no matter how bad I mess up or anything.
Praise God, He took and brought me back!
However, just before getting on here, I was listening to ''The Heart Of Worship'', and''Sin Died Here''....there's a part in Sin Died Here that says ''a heart so unclean, made spotless'' and I said that's me, oh God I have to do this, I have to go back to God. I hadn't really totally ''fallen away'' or ''left'' God, I just wasn't where I should be with Him. I was caught up in sin, and the conviction/guilt of it.
I just finally literally fell to my knees, and was face down on the floor, with my hands on my head, I didn't know what to do, say, or anything...then I folded my hands, in front of me, and rested my head on my arms....and I cried and cried, begging God to forgive me.
To help me, I can't do this anymore, and so I told Him, ''Father God, I'm comming back, I can't do this, I'm comming back''.
I've realized how bad I messed up, and I kept praying daily, God deliver me from the sin, the addiction to a specific one, as I need and want to be dead to sin, not in it.it's odd to most folks to hear ''addiction to a sin'' but that's JUST what it was.
I'm back to where I need to be, ''the slate has been wipped clean'' and I know that He will NEVER leave or forsake me, no matter how bad I mess up or anything.
Praise God, He took and brought me back!