Help what do I do I have found some pictures of half naked girls on his phone

[Teehdub]

I have been with my partner for 5+ years. We have been good friends for 7. We have been engaged for 1 year and a half now.everything was great I thought I found my life partner and before we have even said our vowels I fell deeply in love with this boy. But then I saw him looking at half naked girls on instagram who were even to me admittedly beautiful. It made me feel cheap and as if out love was not real. I confronted him and things blew up. He denied it and every time his story changed. I let it go and mow I year later he must be getting sloppy or sick of hiding it again cause I found half naked pics of girls we both know from instagram on his phone screenshotted. I cry almost every night he comes home so normal with no signs that he is looking else where. But when he has his phone my heart sinks. I know he isn't constantly looking but when he does even.in secret it breaks my heart. Help help help.

 

[Ugly]

If he's not willing to admit to the problem, then you're stuck and there's nothing you can do. Until he owns up to it, and has a genuine desire to quit, then you have to choose if you want to stay with someone who has that problem or not. Because if he's doing that then there is a very good chance he's doing worse, or will be.

 

[blue_ladybug]

No offense, but if you marry him knowing he's doing this nasty thing, and has been for a long time, then you're a fool. He's been doing it for over a year and started up again recently. Tell him to get help or you won't marry him. Give him back the engagement ring. If you DO marry him you WILL regret it.

 

[Teehdub]

If he's not willing to admit to the problem, then you're stuck and there's nothing you can do. Until he owns up to it, and has a genuine desire to quit, then you have to choose if you want to stay with someone who has that problem or not. Because if he's doing that then there is a very good chance he's doing worse, or will be.[/QUOTE

Thank you for your advice. When emotions are raw it is sometimes so hard to think for yourself. Love can be so blind but also bad when it is unequally matched. The words you shared with me I am seriously taking note of.

 

[Teehdub]

No offense, but if you marry him knowing he's doing this nasty thing, and has been for a long time, then you're a fool. He's been doing it for over a year and started up again recently. Tell him to get help or you won't marry him. Give him back the engagement ring. If you DO marry him you WILL regret it.

You are totally right. We are supposed to be getting married next year but ever since I found out all feelings of marriage flew our the door. It's just not how I pictured engagement to be or our relationship. I can help someone and be loyal through their baggage but cheating is never ok. I know he isn't physically cheating but now I know where his heart is. Thanks for your advice am seriously considering.

 

[blue_ladybug]

You are totally right. We are supposed to be getting married next year but ever since I found out all feelings of marriage flew our the door. It's just not how I pictured engagement to be or our relationship. I can help someone and be loyal through their baggage but cheating is never ok. I know he isn't physically cheating but now I know where his heart is. Thanks for your advice am seriously considering.

If he's looking at naked girls, he might as well be cheating. I'm sure he's probably thinking dirty thoughts about them. Is there any chance that he COULD be physically cheating and you just don't know it yet?

 

[angelsonthemove4u]

Marriage is based on mutual trust , you do not trust him so do not get married . shake the dust off and move on , If one loves God one is spiritual in one`s thinking ,not carnal . To become unequally yoked spiritually is a mistake and to become needy for love is dangerous , pray about what God wants for you and not what you want , which is apparently to be in a relationship with unrequited love . God says separate yourself from those who walk disorderly and they will feel shame and shame is what God uses to teach us all lessons....

 

[Teehdub]

If he's looking at naked girls, he might as well be cheating. I'm sure he's probably thinking dirty thoughts about them. Is there any chance that he COULD be physically cheating and you just don't know it yet?

I too believe that this is a form of cheating but I have talked to others and they have said he didn't physically do it so it's not cheating. I am with him literally all the time but there is a chance that he could be cheating at work. I would like to think he is not but there is a chance he is. It just confuses me cause he comes home from work talking about how him and his work mates talk bible verses etc... It could all be a lie

 

[Teehdub]

Marriage is based on mutual trust , you do not trust him so do not get married . shake the dust off and move on , If one loves God one is spiritual in one`s thinking ,not carnal . To become unequally yoked spiritually is a mistake and to become needy for love is dangerous , pray about what God wants for you and not what you want , which is apparently to be in a relationship with unrequited love . God says separate yourself from those who walk disorderly and they will feel shame and shame is what God uses to teach us all lessons....

I would like to say thank you. For confirming everything I feared about the situation I am in. You are right about me becoming needy for love. We have been in this relationship so long I forgot what it is like to live.life without him. He left this morning for work as usual and all night I wept silently in able to sleep. My dreams were empty and ad soon as he left I slept and slept well and had a great dream. I wrote this online last night because I wanted great Christian advice. In tired of being tired.

 

[angelsonthemove4u]

God always uses if , so allow me to do the same , if your man loves God then do things God`s way and find counseling , you need a third party (preferably ) another Christian with knowledge of what God thinks,for all wisdom flows from God ,if you are as confused as you say you are , If you want a stable life I recommend you take a step back without judgement and discern the viability long range of the relationship, this takes spiritual maturity and we find that in Scripture , Remember this before you submit to any man , God does not want you to have your children with the wrong person , that is why it is so very important to be wise in all things concerning your destiny with The Living God . Just be smart about things ok ?

 

[angelsonthemove4u]

P.S. God loves you because He is Love and your destiny is with Him , so seek and you shall find...God knows your deeply depressed at this time , but He is moving in your heart at this moment and wants you to know everything works to the good for those who LOVE Him , Angelsonthemove4u says look up and feel His Glory.....Amen Amen and Thats that.

 

[Teehdub]

P.S. God loves you because He is Love and your destiny is with Him , so seek and you shall find...God knows your deeply depressed at this time , but He is moving in your heart at this moment and wants you to know everything works to the good for those who LOVE Him , Angelsonthemove4u says look up and feel His Glory.....Amen Amen and Thats that.

Thanks so much for all your insight into my situation from a different perspective. All you have said had truly helped me. I searched through many Christian chat groups and this one was the only one that seemed legitimate. I posted this in blind faith that someone out there will see an answer that I on my own just wasn't getting. I will be taking these steps and putting it into action. Every bit of advice is helpful. I was considering deleting this post now that I am done but I realise someone else may be suffering the same situation and I dint want to deprive them of a blessing.

 

[angelsonthemove4u]

God always gets the Glory , We with a glad heart accept your Thanks , (IF ) you or anyone needs God`s guidance remember Jeremiah 3:15 and remember this also ,there will always be angelsonthemove4u......Peace from the Father be with you always .