Help with anger problems.

[Bahr]

Well, to start off, i'm 19. Have been working a full time job since I was 16. I dropped out of high school because I couldn't stand to be around so many people. As soon as I dropped out I got my GED and started working full time hard labor. I never go to town unless I have too because being around a lot of folks makes me uneasy, I was born and raised on a farm, mostly away from people and I like it that way.

Ive never had alot of friends, because well. I diddent want em'. I have a few decent friends. I never ask them for favors or for help because I don't want to ever depend on any body, and try to get along by myself. I spend most of my time when I'm not working in the woods, Isolated because thats the only place I feel comfortable.
But ive been getting worse. My anger problems. I don't like anybody. I don't start fights or get into them but it dosent take much to make me mad anymore. And I will hold grudges for ages. Once you make me mad, or disrespect me in any way. Its done. As a matter of fact today I got so mad at a co worker that my eyes hurt. I think thats a new one for me. Ive never been so mad that my eyes felt like there we're gonna explode.

My main problem is I'd like to be treated the way I treat folks, I was raised saying yes sir and yes mam. But most folks don't have that kind of decency or respect anymore and thats what make me mad. I think my main problem is I don't really have anybody to vent my frustrations on.
I get along better with faceless people over the internet because if I don't get along with them its easy to just block or delete them. And its easier to pick and choose people by what they type and say, than in "real life" where folks change so drastically and so quick.

Edit: Also I posted this in the family forum for two reasons. For one, my problem does get in the way of me and some of my extended family Im close with my sister and folks but thats it. I don;t like none of the rest. And I'm thinking some of ya'll can relate....maybe.
My friends say I really don't show any facial expressions or emotions. I don't really talk as much as I used too. Now It's only sarcastic remarks. Ive always been anti-social, But now its worse. I don't like being around anybody. My family and friends are wondering what caused it. But I don't know myself. And I don't have a clue on how to find out.

So I figured what better place to ask for help and advice then a Christian forum.

 

[kayem77]

Hi Bahr . Im no expert to give an expert advice...but I can suggest you to start relating a little more to people, if you need to do it in very small steps then do it that way, however you feel comfortable,what I can tell you is that if you continue isolating yourself, with the time it will get harder for you to accostum to people and have a healthy relationship either of friendship or something more... everyone is different, maybe u dont need to have tons of friends but is bad for you to live isolated...everybody needs a friend, well that's what I think. Hope it helps, if u want to talk to me, feel free . God bless you.

 

[Bahr]

Hi Bahr . Im no expert to give an expert advice...but I can suggest you to start relating a little more to people, if you need to do it in very small steps then do it that way, however you feel comfortable,what I can tell you is that if you continue isolating yourself, with the time it will get harder for you to accostum to people and have a healthy relationship either of friendship or something more... everyone is different, maybe u dont need to have tons of friends but is bad for you to live isolated...everybody needs a friend, well that's what I think. Hope it helps, if u want to talk to me, feel free . God bless you.

I'm fine around three or four people. But if i'm in a crowded store I have to get out. I just cant stand it.

 

[Rheod]

Have u ever been tested for autism? They sound like autistic traits. But also God is always there talk to him he will help. God bless. Rheo x

 

[wolfywolfs]

maybe u have social anxiety disorder and the reason your holding grudges and getting angry easy is because maybe you didnt expierence much of it as a child so you dont know how to react so you either go over the top or think nothing of it

 

[trust_in_the_name]

Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.

 

[Adrianv125]

Well first you need to get a clear notion of what the "outside" is. Everywhere in this world is going through a lack of morality and lack of care for anyone, lack of God is the better explanation. Man is his own god for those who don't serve the true LORD. So from this fact you should expect people to treat you not so nicely. If you are a true son of God you must realize that our Savior came and all the fullness of God is in Him. He lived the most humble life anyone could live free from any luxury he even said he didn't have a place to lay his head, yet he healed all of those who came at His feet in faith and spoke of the Good news even the day He died. People tortured Him and humiliated Him and called Him a blasphemer, but He never once defended Himself even though He said he could ask His father and he would send a legion of angels. Jesus came and lied down His life for the whole world. He came to set the example for us, and if you truly believe in Him and belong to Him, He is the standard to follow.

God Bless you!

 

[dmdave17]

Dear Bahr,

While God can do anything and heal anyone, I believe that sometimes He arranges things in such a way as to use the help of humans to do His work. (Would anyone deny that it is His hand that guides the great surgeons of today in the intricate procedures they perform?) In your case, it sounds to me like you might benefit from the guidance of a Christian counselor. If you belong to a church you could try talking to your pastor. If he or she cannot help you, I am sure that you could be referred to someone who can help you work through your problems.

Most importantly, don't get down on yourself because of what you are feeling. Many people prefer to be loners, rather than being involved with large crowds of people. The anger issue is a little more troublesome, but even that is not a "fatal error". God loves you and stands ready to help you if only you ask. And He forgives all things.

God bless you and be with you in your struggle.

 

[Bahr]

Dear Bahr,

While God can do anything and heal anyone, I believe that sometimes He arranges things in such a way as to use the help of humans to do His work. (Would anyone deny that it is His hand that guides the great surgeons of today in the intricate procedures they perform?) In your case, it sounds to me like you might benefit from the guidance of a Christian counselor. If you belong to a church you could try talking to your pastor. If he or she cannot help you, I am sure that you could be referred to someone who can help you work through your problems.

Most importantly, don't get down on yourself because of what you are feeling. Many people prefer to be loners, rather than being involved with large crowds of people. The anger issue is a little more troublesome, but even that is not a "fatal error". God loves you and stands ready to help you if only you ask. And He forgives all things.

God bless you and be with you in your struggle.

Well since ive posted this thread, some strange things have happened. Allot of not very well hidden messages. To the point I haven't been to a church in ten years because of my hate of being in a crowded room. But the day after I posted this thread my job hired a new guy. And he was talking to me about religion. And invited me to his church. I told him I would go. Being a man of my word im gonna be there at 9:30 tomorrow morning. Its just funny how since ive joined this forum how much things have changed within a few days.

 

[karine___]

wow, how nice Bahr ! sometimes we don't know how to act , what to do but we do want a negative situation or behavior to change and God knows our heart is willing so He makes a way, it's funny . He's awesome

 

[Adrianv125]

It is God bahr he works in mysterious ways and answers our prayers

 

[zeroturbulence]

Well since ive posted this thread, some strange things have happened. Allot of not very well hidden messages. To the point I haven't been to a church in ten years because of my hate of being in a crowded room. But the day after I posted this thread my job hired a new guy. And he was talking to me about religion. And invited me to his church. I told him I would go. Being a man of my word im gonna be there at 9:30 tomorrow morning. Its just funny how since ive joined this forum how much things have changed within a few days.

SO glad to hear that! Just so you know, I have been that angry where my eyes hurt and I felt like they would explode too. After I found Jesus I discovered some ways to deal with anger. The first way is to think of Jesus' suffering on the cross, especially the crown of thorns and how the roman soldiers hammered the nails into his hands and feet. Also, think of Jesus' sorrowful face because he sees how others treat you and he knows how much it hurts you. You are not alone in your pain.

The second thing is to ask Jesus to remove the dark cloud that has covered your heart. Picture that cloud in your mind covering your heart with darkness. Then picture it dissipating before your eyes. I read once that we either spread darkness or light when we treat other people and no matter which one we spread, it causes the other person to spread it to others, to their family and friends, and coworkers. So it is good for us to stop the darkness in its tracks by asking Jesus to remove it from our hearts.

 

[Bahr]

I do have to point this out after reading a few of ya'lls replys. It seems that my general attirude and lack of expression has made me a reputation. Allot of folks are kind of weary around me. You know, generally don't bother me because they don't know whats up. Thing is, i'd give anybody the shirt off my back if they really needed it.