How do I become good and close friends with girls.

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missy2shoes said:
I'm really gonna try and word this nicely.....you seem like a nice bloke.....but come across as pessimistic and desperate......for gals, there's nothing more off putting than a desperado.....it kinda gives us the creeps lol.......

Ya need to be really happy with who you are in Christ first and foremost......a close relationship with Jesus is the key to relating to others....male or female.......
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^^ this.

This i had to learn a long time ago. i heard at one point that girls are really attracted to confidence. Lacking in confidence at the time made me realize a lot of things about myself and my relationship to others, especially girls. No one really likes the person who is down in the dumps all the time. We'll love ya dude, but life is depressing as it is already sometimes, and people want to see a light in the world. That's why We are to the "salt and light" of the world as the bible says( sorry don't have the exact verses atm, but later, they will come possibly). When you reflect Christ, TRUST ME the right girl will come along some day and fidn that attractive because your mindset in Christ will line up with hers and you'll have other things in common and it'll just click! Lord knows I'm waiting on that to happen haha!

All it takes is the first step to being a diferent you in Christ. You just have to get out of your solo pity party( been there myself).....and take that 1st step with confidance in Christ. We ain't " more than conqueors" for nothing.
 
luke15chick said:
Most guys like doing whether it's sports, video games or some kind of action oriented activity. Girls enjoy conversation. If you can have a conversation with a girl and demonstrate that you understand and hear what she is saying she will most likely respect you and possibly be your friend.
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Well then how do I get a girl to want to have a convo with me with me?
 
dothackzero said:
Well then how do I get a girl to want to have a convo with me with me?
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well you can't anyone to want to have a conversation with you. It is the other persons choice. But it looks like some girls are talking to you right now.
 
Just talk to them (easier said than done, I know) - talk about things that interest you, or something that you know interests them. Don't have obvious motives (like saying things like "so what do you look for in a guy?" - that's not conversation, that's leading somewhere, if you know what I mean).

I hope that helps a little.

If you don't mind me asking, what's your social situation like? Do you go to school? Church? In other words, what are your main methods of meeting people, male and female alike?
 
hey write me and I'll talk with you and help you out a little. I have lots of guy friends and therefore lots of practice in talking to guys
 
I suggest throwing a cat in a tree..... Or even a rabbit.. so long as its a small defensless animal.... wait till a girl is walking by then hurry up and CLIMB UP THE TREEE AND SAVE IT!!! Girls are supposed to love stuff like that right.........
 
I do agree with being confident, but not to the point where you seem arrogant. You have to put all your worries behind & just go for it, as far as initiating conversation with the opposite sex, start off by asking how there day is going; The simplest means of conversation are often the ones that make the most impact. Pray for confidence & don't be afraid to be yourself. If someone cannot accept you for who you are, that's their loss. Being yourself at all times is a blessing, don't let peoples opinions/ways change who you are.
 
dont really know how you would start a convo w/ a girl,but u can write me and we can talk...
maybe i could help you a little
 
luke15chick said:
Girls enjoy conversation. If you can have a conversation with a girl and demonstrate that you understand and hear what she is saying she will most likely respect you and possibly be your friend.
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If you can listen to a girl and be understanding and reassuring even when she's not making sense, she just might fall in love with you. Is it just me or does it seem (from my point of view anyway, that in theory) it's easy for a guy to get a girl to fall in love with him? Guys have it so easy!!!
 
Ancilla said:
Is it just me or does it seem (from my point of view anyway, that in theory) it's easy for a guy to get a girl to fall in love with him? Guys have it so easy!!!
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From my point of view, in theory... it's just you.
 
missy2shoes said:
I'm really gonna try and word this nicely.....you seem like a nice bloke.....but come across as pessimistic and desperate......for gals, there's nothing more off putting than a desperado.....it kinda gives us the creeps lol.......

Ya need to be really happy with who you are in Christ first and foremost......a close relationship with Jesus is the key to relating to others....male or female.......
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She's right, you know. I thought the same thing. A mopey, downer guy can often times come off creepy. That's not to say you won't have a bad day or need to vent once in a while, but a guy who cannot see that he is a man in Christ, and therefore sounds like Eeyore all the time is a major turn off... even just for a friendship. Even if you don't believe it, start speaking outloud what the bible actually says about you. The good stuff, and after a month or two, you might just start to believe it.
Can everyone help me out with suggestions here?? Like, 'You are fearfully and wonderfully made'. Basically ALL of Psalm 139, and everyone else is going to post suggestions of other things for you to say to yourself daily to build up your confidence. :)
Hang in there!
 
Beeb0 said:
I do agree with being confident, but not to the point where you seem arrogant. You have to put all your worries behind & just go for it, as far as initiating conversation with the opposite sex, start off by asking how there day is going; The simplest means of conversation are often the ones that make the most impact. Pray for confidence & don't be afraid to be yourself. If someone cannot accept you for who you are, that's their loss. Being yourself at all times is a blessing, don't let peoples opinions/ways change who you are.
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Exactly! It's a turn off to be arrogant, and it's a turn off to be desperate. As a woman, we need to see that you are confident in who you are in Christ - just like we as gals need to be.
 
dothackzero said:
I have no really good close friends that are girls. I have very bad social skill, and bad with making friends in gerenral, but I how do I make good close friends with girls. Seriously, I've gotten more hugs from guys in a week then I've gotten from girls all year. Anyone have any suggestions. Hopefully making friends with girls will make it easier to wait for a girlfriend.
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If you figure it out, please tell me. Seriously. Good luck!! I messed it up more than once.

:confused:
 
I think you really should be asking yourself WHY you feel a need to become good close friends with girls. Although I dont know you, I would think that it comes from an insecurity within yourself. Maybe you are convinced that women arent attracted to you, or maybe you dont feel that you are worthy of a womans interest. In either case, the real problem is your own self-esteem and not the fact that you have no women friends.

I suggest that you work on your self-esteem issues. Know first and foremost that you were created in Gods image! Are you familiar with the story of Gideon in the bible? He was a poor boy and the least in his fathers house. An angel appeared to him and said to him "The LORD is with you, mighty warrior!" (Judges 6:12) Gideon looked around and wondered who the angel was talking to. He then went on to lead an army that brought down the in-penetrable walls of Jericho. You see, GOD sees you as the powerful person he created, not as you see yourself. Remember this verse:

"I can do everything through He who gives me strength"
Phillippians 4:13

Dont worry your head over girls. Once you find the strength and courage that is already inside you, they will sense that and it will make you more attractive to them. They might not be falling all over you but at least they will be much more receptive and want to get to know you better.

Another piece of advice is to work on yourself physically. Get physically strong. Exercise, especially weightlifting really does wonders for a guys self-image and "ego" for lack of a better word. If you cant get to a gym, do push-ups and sit-ups and run or bike and you can buy some dumbells and use those too. It might even make you over-correct and become cocky - but right now that is the least of your worries.

"Fear of man will prove to be a snare...but whoever trusts in the LORD will be kept safe."
Proverbs 29:25
 
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why do you need advice as the only means for you to move forward???? put yourself in the environment where people are and chances are ul meet people.
 
tennisguy2010 said:
why do you need advice as the only means for you to move forward???? put yourself in the environment where people are and chances are ul meet people.
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Yeah, it's not that easy for me.

I goto work(Really have no friends there)
I goto school(no friends there)
I goto chruch(Nobody really there my age)
I goto a Bible Study(All my friends there are guys. The girls don't really treat me like a friend other than hugging me, but they pay attention to the other guys.)
I goto diffrent chruch(My only friends there are the ones from the Bible Study)

So yeah, I do get out. I'm just not that good with people...
 
You do realize that if you want you can knock down the entire card house if u will.....if your not happy with your life atm then change it. Make it so you are doing things to further progress yourself in your relationships with others. Obviously going to church is a biggy but you can go and still do other things, set time for you to just go out and party you dont have to do drugs or drink. Just go out and have fun, heres an idea get a buncha friends together on a weekend where you make time, and go take a night on the town go hang out go to the mall movies, go throw pumpkins in the air. If people are having a great time there going to be willing to hang out with you, then they sat o this dothackzero is a pretty cool guy for doing all this who woulda thought????
 
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