how do I react?

[Locoponydirtman]

Meh, walk on.
Focus on those you can invest in, and have a relationship with.

 

[blueluna5]

Hi

I have a half sister. We have had a troubled relationship in the past. We did not grow up together because we lived in different countries and she is 16 years older than me She is a christian. She now lives in the same country as me and I made contact. We met up a few times but she said she could not offer me very much except a coffee and sandwich every now and again in a cafe somewhere. I was quite disappointed because I wanted more from her than that and I wanted to be able to give her more of myself. I decided it was not working and we went our separate ways and have not had contact for about 18 months. I know she is not in the best of health and now that everyone is trying to cope with Covid 19 I wondered how she was doing. I am not sure if it is wise to contact her again. Would there be any point in doing so considering she said she cannot offer me much at all. I was hoping that she would want to have me round to her home and we would do all sorts of things together but she clearly either cannot do that. I am wondering whether it is best to just leave it and concentrate on people who can offer me a lot more. I have tried this with someone else and I was putting in all the effort and getting little back in return so I let that person go out of my life.

Do we as christians have to keep trying with people even if it leads to nothing?

I have the same issue with a half brother. He's 14 years older and he's never been involved with my family for multiple reasons and that includes me.

It's tough to go through. You see these siblings have such a close bond like my husband and his brother. I was hoping when I became an adult we would be closer but neither one of us put in the effort at that point. It's also strange bc we didn't grow up together so essentially we were strangers.

When brother and sister is mentioned in the Bible it is an odd concept for me. I think of myself as possibly a terrible sister or having a brother who doesn't really care about me. So the term of endearment in the Bible is just not there for me. Though I understand the intention seeing other sibling relationships.

I'm not sure what the right answer is. In my case I've "moved on" so to speak and I have a brother in law and sister in law I'm close to. I know it's not the same though and not blood. I have a son so I guess I hope for that friendship when he's an adult.

 

[Mak33]

Hi, I also have a half sis and bro they are younger than me, but I don’t have any contact with them I only saw them once when we we’re young, but as time passes I often wonder how are they doing or if they are well, I don’t have any opportunity to talk to them, I can’t even search them on Fb, I think what I am trying to say is there are gaps in between our lives, that would never be patched up with a few hi’s and hello’s or over a cup of coffee once a month, if you want a relationship with her, it would take time, You would take the time even if it’s just a coffee and sandwich, on your part if you genuinely want it just let her know that you are there for her even if she doesn’t want to have a relationship right now, It is good to know that someone cares and if you really do, just tell her that you just want to know if she’s okay and that if she needs any thing you are there for her, that’s it, Atleast she knows, and you have to be prepared to accept whatever outcome, if she reciprocate or not. That is love, we just give it our best even when we know is in vain... and we don’t give up on our family (half or full). 😍

 

[love_comes_softly]

I think reaching out to see how she’s doing and if there is anything you can do for her would be appropriate, but leave it at that. She would know that you’re thinking about her without feeling pressured to do anything.

I do believe you need to respect her wishes and not try to get her to do things.

Really, you guys are strangers. I think as you focus on how to serve others in general and pray for her, maybe the Lord will open that door one day.

To even think she’d bring you to another country seems quite inappropriate. Would you go with a stranger? That is something that people who have a relationship would do. It would be unfair to judge her for not offering to bring you.

I pray the Lord help you to find peace in waiting this out and possibly not gaining a relationship here.

 

[presidente]

If it were me I think I would have gone with the sandwiches occasionally and let the relationship grow from there.

She may have more time now. Check on her and see if she is okay. She might have wanted to get to know you but might have been afraid of you being too clingy or wanting financial help.

 

[Prycejosh1987]

Do we as christians have to keep trying with people even if it leads to nothing?

The short answer is it depends. Its possible to do everything you can to love your family and they can throw it back in your face. We should always persist and just let it swing if we are not getting through to them. Its foolish to keep trying to be in peoples lives and they don want you there. Keep communicating where and when you can and keep her in your prayers and believe in change.