How long have you been single?

[Lovette]

it is? Why has that sort of thing happened for so many Christian couples then? I guess all the married Christian couples in the world are all either openly miserable or secretly miserable?

This statement is purely hypothetical and imaginary, when such "another Christian you share mutual attraction with" is nothing but a fictional figure to buttress your argument. That is a house not even built on sand, but on thin air. What would you do when there's no such person in your local church, only old retired seniors?

 

[Snackersmom]

Nope, I just assumed that what you're saying or implying, because that's the common narrative preached in the purity culture.

You wouldn't need to assume what a person is saying if you were intelligent enough to comprehend what they are actually saying. Are you having trouble sounding out the words?

 

[Lovette]

First friendship, then marriage this is very natural.
But for people who enjoy single life, it is fine too.
To each its own.
Respect others preference.

I'm just being utterly frustrated at the sexual prosperity gospel, assuming that marriage is the absolute "normal" and "natural" state, and God will reward your chastity with happy marriage - and punish your promiscurity with abusive marriage or no marriage at all. You know, if you hear that believe in Jesus you'd be as strong as a bull and as rich as Bezos, you'd just surely laugh it off; yet when the reward is changed to happy marriage, blissful sex, intimate relationship and godly kids, everyone's falling for it, and nothing could snap them out of their stupor.

 

[Churchgoer]

I'm just being utterly frustrated at the sexual prosperity gospel, assuming that marriage is the absolute "normal" and "natural" state, and God will reward your chastity with happy marriage - and punish your promiscurity with abusive marriage or no marriage at all. You know, if you hear that believe in Jesus you'd be as strong as a bull and as rich as Bezos, you'd just surely laugh it off; yet when the reward is changed to happy marriage, blissful sex, intimate relationship and godly kids, everyone's falling for it, and nothing could snap them out of their stupor.

Oh, I have never heard that kind of preaching.

My local church respect singles, as well as married. We do teach stay pure and holy, inside and outside of marriage.
I never hear and marriage sexual, finance reward if stay pure.

However, in general if we obey God, things are smoother. Foe example, no sexual immorality, children in safe parents care, stable marriage, stable society.

 

[Lovette]

You wouldn't need to assume what a person is saying if you were intelligent enough to comprehend what they are actually saying. Are you having trouble sounding out the words?

No, I've just lost track, and I'm sorry if I'm not being civil. Would you kindly remind both of us, what are we even bickering at?

 

[Mem]

1Tim 4 introduces a warning against apostasy

1 Now the Spirit expressly states that in later times some will abandon the faith to follow deceitful spirits and the teachings of demons, 2 influenced by the hypocrisy of liars, whose consciences are seared with a hot iron.
3 They will prohibit marriage and require abstinence from certain foods that God has created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and know the truth.
4 For every creation of God is good, and nothing that is received with thanksgiving should be rejected,
5 because it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer.

If nothing else were sanctified, marriage certainly is. So, according to the sentiment of verse 4, and regard to the question, "Who", the answer is "Who not?" or rather, "Who could not be sanctified in marriage?"

 

[Lovette]

Oh, I have never heard that kind of preaching.

My local church respect singles, as well as married. We do teach stay pure and holy, inside and outside of marriage.
I never hear and marriage sexual, finance reward if stay pure.

However, in general if we obey God, things are smoother. Foe example, no sexual immorality, children in safe parents care, stable marriage, stable society.

Well I've just assumed this kind of preaching to be the norm everywhere. It seems to me that the modern church has no response or solution for the incel, volcel, femcel and gender war phenomenon, all their narrative is built around (pre-existing) marriage.

 

[Lovette]

If nothing else were sanctified, marriage certainly is. So, according to the sentiment of verse 4, and regard to the question, "Who", the answer is "Who not?" or rather, "Who could not be sanctified in marriage?"

"There are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake."

 

[Snackersmom]

No, I've just lost track, and I'm sorry if I'm not being civil. Would you kindly remind both of us, what are we even bickering at?

I don't need a reminder, but I can give you one since you need it.

You are definitely being uncivil. You have no idea what anyone here actually believes, even though they have been telling you ad nauseum. It just goes right over your head..

You act as if we all have one mind and believe the same things, and you alone are capable of transcending the common church-ish narratives that you are so frustrated with.

DUDE. YOU ARE LITERALLY POSTING IN THE SINGLES FORUM. WE UNDERSTAND SINGLENESS. WE LIVE IT. MOST OF US ACCEPT IT WITH GODS GRACE. YOU ARE SNEERING AT PEOPLE FOR CONCEPTS THEY DONT EVEN BELIEVE IN.

If you are truly having cognitive difficulties then you have my sympathy. But if you are capable of comprehending what is being said then why are you making no effort to do so? Your answers are very flat and robotic, almost dissociative

 

[Mem]

"There are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake."

I intended to continue in 1 Timothy 4,
7 But reject irreverent, silly myths. Instead, train yourself for godliness.
8 For physical exercise is of limited value, but godliness is valuable in every way, holding promise for the present life and for the one to come.
9 This is a trustworthy saying, worthy of full acceptance.

The passage you offered was written within the context of the subject of divorce where his disciples observed, "If this is the case, it is better not to marry."
I think it's reasonable to assume that there are those that hold the position that that passage suggests that there is no godliness apart from becoming a eunuch, is this your view?

The lesson about divorce teaches that marriage is not meant to be entered into nor exited out of any less frivolously as one would making the decision to become a eunuch. Where the latter gives up his (drive? for life? ), the former proverbially gives up his life.

 

[Lovette]

I don't need a reminder, but I can give you one since you need it.

You are definitely being uncivil. You have no idea what anyone here actually believes, even though they have been telling you ad nauseum. It just goes right over your head..

You act as if we all have one mind and believe the same things, and you alone are capable of transcending the common church-ish narratives that you are so frustrated with.

DUDE. YOU ARE LITERALLY POSTING IN THE SINGLES FORUM. WE UNDERSTAND SINGLENESS. WE LIVE IT. MOST OF US ACCEPT IT WITH GODS GRACE. YOU ARE SNEERING AT PEOPLE FOR CONCEPTS THEY DONT EVEN BELIEVE IN.

If you are truly having cognitive difficulties then you have my sympathy. But if you are capable of comprehending what is being said then why are you making no effort to do so? Your answers are very flat and robotic, almost dissociative

I still don't get what you're so upset at. My only point is to flip that "church-ish" narrative, flip singleness from a deficient, suboptimal even shameful state to a badge of honor, the spiritual journey generations of church forefathers had treaded.

 

[Lovette]

The passage you offered was written within the context of the subject of divorce where his disciples observed, "If this is the case, it is better not to marry."
I think it's reasonable to assume that there are those that hold the position that that passage suggests that there is no godliness apart from becoming a eunuch, is this your view?

The lesson about divorce teaches that marriage is not meant to be entered into nor exited out of any less frivolously as one would making the decision to become a eunuch. Where the latter gives up his (drive? for life? ), the former proverbially gives up his life.

My view is the exact same view Paul taught in 1 Cor. 7:27 - "Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife." You're baptized as married, stay married; you're baptized as single, stay single.

I'm not saying that marriage is inherently bad or ungodly, but I do believe it's not inherently Christian, not even inherently Jewish, for marriage was ordained by God as an institution for all mankind, including indigenous tribes; and it was only canonized as a holy sacrament by the fourth Lateran Council in the early 13th century, then kind of venerated in the Reformation, an adult woman not married at an older age could be suspected as a harlot or a witch; and the rise of "purity culture" was more recent in the 80s and 90s, largely a response to the sexual revolution and AIDS epidemic, and then in recent decades, marriage is hyped up once again as a response to the "girl boss" feminism and falling birth rate. Therefore it's reasonable to conclude that marriage is a worldly affair promoted with a Christian label, by no means does marriage itself makes you more godly. And it could be a blessing or a curse, depending on your partner.

 

[Mem]

My view is the exact same view Paul taught in 1 Cor. 7:27 - "Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife." You're baptized as married, stay married; you're baptized as single, stay single.

I'm not saying that marriage is inherently bad or ungodly, but I do believe it's not inherently Christian, not even inherently Jewish, for marriage was ordained by God as an institution for all mankind, including indigenous tribes; and it was only canonized as a holy sacrament by the fourth Lateran Council in the early 13th century, then kind of venerated in the Reformation, an adult woman not married at an older age could be suspected as a harlot or a witch; and the rise of "purity culture" was more recent in the 80s and 90s, largely a response to the sexual revolution and AIDS epidemic, and then in recent decades, marriage is hyped up once again as a response to the "girl boss" feminism and falling birth rate. Therefore it's reasonable to conclude that marriage is a worldly affair promoted with a Christian label, by no means does marriage itself makes you more godly. And it could be a blessing or a curse, depending on your partner.

Idealized and idolize are only differentiated between two letters for the one. However, English doesn't work like Hebrew does. In Hebrew, words that are spelled with the same consonants are usually somehow related. But singleness can be idolized just as much as marriage, with potential to be as much a stumbling block for the married as much as marriage has potential to be a stumbling block for the single.

 

[Lovette]

Idealized and idolize are only differentiated between two letters for the one. However, English doesn't work like Hebrew does. In Hebrew, words that are spelled with the same consonants are usually somehow related. But singleness can be idolized just as much as marriage, with potential to be as much a stumbling block for the married as much as marriage has potential to be a stumbling block for the single.

Check this out, I couldn't put it better.

Singleness is our default state of being, especially for those who grew up in a strange neighborhood, with neglectful or busy parents and no siblings, and this state of being is naturally carried into your adulthood, up till your twilight years. Marriage on the other hand, is a choice, and probably THE most important choice in your entire life, it's not like something naturally happens to you. But either way, a true child of God ought to be satisfied in him regardless of your circumtance.

And yes, of course singleness can be idolized, countless articles like that on NY Times, but what I'm doing is more like a justification, an intellectual endeavor to make sense of it. And what sense have I made? Well, I've said this before, consider singleness - and celibacy - a gift, per Matt. 19:11-12; if not a gift, a test (of your faith); if not a test, a fate; if not a fate, a penance. The solution is not desparately getting yourself paired with a partner, but to accept where you are as the will of God, with find peace and solace.

 

[Omegafade]

I've been single for 3 years

 

[Mem]

The solution is not desparately getting yourself paired with a partner, but to accept where you are as the will of God, with find peace and solace.

Accepting yourself, and others, as individual with peace and solace through the challenges of life would certainly help in taking on the challenges of married life.

 

[Lovette]

Accepting yourself, and others, as individual with peace and solace through the challenges of life would certainly help in taking on the challenges of married life.

And the lack thereof.

 

[Mem]

And the lack thereof.

God said something like, "even though I've been a husband to you..." I'm not sure we're even talking about the same thing.

 

[Lovette]

God said something like, "even though I've been a husband to you..." I'm not sure we're even talking about the same thing.

That was spoken unto the nation of Israel.

 

[Mem]

That was spoken unto the nation of Israel.

Right, so His example doesn't qualify under your definition.