I Don't Like Men
- Thread starter VineyardsOfEngedi
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Figured I must have stepped over a line and went too far is all .. If I did I apologize .. But looking back I think maybe so ..
I like to play but I do stick my foot in my mouth a plenty .. It's a joke between my wife and I about Elvis since he died and I can't find the edit button .. Now an edit button shows up so
I like to play but I do stick my foot in my mouth a plenty .. It's a joke between my wife and I about Elvis since he died and I can't find the edit button .. Now an edit button shows up so
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And if it’s something productive, not like before, thank you lol!
I had a conversation with my daughter that made me think about this thread and wanted to share. It went something like this:
Daughter: Mom, why do you think I don’t have a boyfriend? (so out of the blue)
Me: (I was taken aback, tried not to show it) Well, mija I can tell you why. It could be that the boys are expecting you to do certain things and you’re not giving in. It could be how you’re interacting with them. It could be that they can’t appreciate you. It can be many different reasons but it’s OK because it is not the right time.
* Blurred conversation*
And then :
* Warning: What I share next could offend the easily offended lol. I’m not sure how we started talking about it but this was another part of the conversation. (We have many conversations about many different things, I never had with my mother. I get shocked most of the time by her questions :/ ).
Daughter: A girl that shows cleavage doesn’t make her promiscuous ( I am using pg language).
Me: It very much does make her a ….
Daughter: NO, it doesn’t because she’s not doing anything physically sexual!
Me: OH, It sure does! Want me to tell you how?
Daughter: NO, it doesn’t! She’s just showing cleavage not sleeping around. Wearing a skirt doesn’t make a girl a …….!
Me: It definitely does and I will tell you how. Do you think that a woman who is not sleeping around or doing sexual things but is showing her breast all the way down here (gave example) or wears a skirt right below her butt cheek, is not a …….?
Daughter: OK, Yes I get it, It can.
* We had more discussion and said other things I’m only sharing what I recall *
Me: Mija, you don’t have to dress provocative to get a boyfriend, and if you think you have to there is something wrong.
Daughter: No, I know it’s just that it's different now.
Me: Oh, no, a …. In Jesus time, is the same today. No difference. Mija it is so much better if you wait for whoever God has for you and you will be happy that you did and he will be happy that you did, also.
Daughter: Yes I want to wait but no one is waiting for anyone now!
Me: That’s not true, I’m waiting!
Me: Mija you can believe that there is a guy waiting.
Daughter: NO they’re not! NO one is waiting. Where are they? Where are the guys that wait? What guys?
Me: That’s not true, I’m waiting!
Daughter: Oh, yea and who’s waiting for you ! NO one is waiting for you!
Me: That’s Ok, I just know I’m waiting for something.
Daughter: People only wait because of their experiences. Yea, mom, you’re only waiting cause of everything you’ve been through. I bet that if you were not a heifer and still skinny (she didn’t really say this lol but i’m making a contrast comparison) you wouldn’t be waiting.
Me: (Had an epiphany, paused for what seemed like forever but was only a second) You’re right, (I never considered myself pretty or boasted about my looks but I had moments of confidence, my mother has said that if I hadn’t gone through what I did, I would be proud) who knows with how many guys I would have slept with. Who knows where I would have ended up. I could have been into drugs, still drinking, not caring, partying, etc. You’re right, but I am thankful for everything because if I hadn’t gone through what I have I would not be here today, seeking and wanting God.
So I wanted to share this partial private, personal conversation I had with my daughter because while I am very much disappointed and disgusted by men and women alike for various reasons, I realize that maybe I needed to go through everything so that God can keep me humble and keep me inline for his purpose, for that I am thankful. Or who knows maybe had I taken a different route in life maybe he would have still reached out to me and I would have suffered far more than I have now? So many unanswered questions.
Anyways, I just wanted to share because it made me realize that while I have been hurt, I think the main purpose of this hurt was and is to keep me humble in order to seek him and can’t really hold anyone responsible?
perspective.
And if it’s something productive, not like before, thank you lol!
I had a conversation with my daughter that made me think about this thread and wanted to share. It went something like this:
Daughter: Mom, why do you think I don’t have a boyfriend? (so out of the blue)
Me: (I was taken aback, tried not to show it) Well, mija I can tell you why. It could be that the boys are expecting you to do certain things and you’re not giving in. It could be how you’re interacting with them. It could be that they can’t appreciate you. It can be many different reasons but it’s OK because it is not the right time.
* Blurred conversation*
And then :
* Warning: What I share next could offend the easily offended lol. I’m not sure how we started talking about it but this was another part of the conversation. (We have many conversations about many different things, I never had with my mother. I get shocked most of the time by her questions :/ ).
Daughter: A girl that shows cleavage doesn’t make her promiscuous ( I am using pg language).
Me: It very much does make her a ….
Daughter: NO, it doesn’t because she’s not doing anything physically sexual!
Me: OH, It sure does! Want me to tell you how?
Daughter: NO, it doesn’t! She’s just showing cleavage not sleeping around. Wearing a skirt doesn’t make a girl a …….!
Me: It definitely does and I will tell you how. Do you think that a woman who is not sleeping around or doing sexual things but is showing her breast all the way down here (gave example) or wears a skirt right below her butt cheek, is not a …….?
Daughter: OK, Yes I get it, It can.
* We had more discussion and said other things I’m only sharing what I recall *
Me: Mija, you don’t have to dress provocative to get a boyfriend, and if you think you have to there is something wrong.
Daughter: No, I know it’s just that it's different now.
Me: Oh, no, a …. In Jesus time, is the same today. No difference. Mija it is so much better if you wait for whoever God has for you and you will be happy that you did and he will be happy that you did, also.
Daughter: Yes I want to wait but no one is waiting for anyone now!
Me: That’s not true, I’m waiting!
Me: Mija you can believe that there is a guy waiting.
Daughter: NO they’re not! NO one is waiting. Where are they? Where are the guys that wait? What guys?
Me: That’s not true, I’m waiting!
Daughter: Oh, yea and who’s waiting for you ! NO one is waiting for you!
Me: That’s Ok, I just know I’m waiting for something.
Daughter: People only wait because of their experiences. Yea, mom, you’re only waiting cause of everything you’ve been through. I bet that if you were not a heifer and still skinny (she didn’t really say this lol but i’m making a contrast comparison) you wouldn’t be waiting.
Me: (Had an epiphany, paused for what seemed like forever but was only a second) You’re right, (I never considered myself pretty or boasted about my looks but I had moments of confidence, my mother has said that if I hadn’t gone through what I did, I would be proud) who knows with how many guys I would have slept with. Who knows where I would have ended up. I could have been into drugs, still drinking, not caring, partying, etc. You’re right, but I am thankful for everything because if I hadn’t gone through what I have I would not be here today, seeking and wanting God.
So I wanted to share this partial private, personal conversation I had with my daughter because while I am very much disappointed and disgusted by men and women alike for various reasons, I realize that maybe I needed to go through everything so that God can keep me humble and keep me inline for his purpose, for that I am thankful. Or who knows maybe had I taken a different route in life maybe he would have still reached out to me and I would have suffered far more than I have now? So many unanswered questions.
Anyways, I just wanted to share because it made me realize that while I have been hurt, I think the main purpose of this hurt was and is to keep me humble in order to seek him and can’t really hold anyone responsible?
perspective.
Secondly your Heavenly Father is for you, and the hurts and pains you’ve suffered are not by His hand. Despite your pain, He drew you. You didn’t suffer those things that you may be drawn to Him, but nonetheless have drawn close to Him. That brings me to the good part of what you said.
You realize that God wants you to seek Him. Sure, what you have suffered because of your own free will, your own decisions and the decisions of others in their free will has ultimately led you to where you are today. But, God can lead anyone out of the shadow of the valley of death. He enters with you to carry you out. So you can say, that despite your sufferings He showed you the light.
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Yes, and there are still things I don't understand and maybe it is in vain to try and understand. I just pray I get a 5x5 plot when everything is restored lol I'm sure it doesn't compare. Btw I was going to ask isn't azareal or whatever you called the guy a fallen angel? I really am curious to know the ending of the book, my creative writing is not good, sorry I couldn't carry the book on haha.
Btw I was going to ask isn't azareal or whatever you called the guy a fallen angel? I really am curious to know the ending of the book, my creative writing is not good, sorry I couldn't carry the book on haha.
Yes, and there are still things I don't understand and maybe it is in vain to try and understand. I just pray I get a 5x5 plot when everything is restored lol I'm sure it doesn't compare. Btw I was going to ask isn't azareal or whatever you called the guy a fallen angel? I really am curious to know the ending of the book, my creative writing is not good, sorry I couldn't carry the book on haha.
Btw I was going to ask isn't azareal or whatever you called the guy a fallen angel? I really am curious to know the ending of the book, my creative writing is not good, sorry I couldn't carry the book on haha.
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Locate the WIN unit in your area. The Women's Intelligence Network has had success in training us guys.
I only know about it because I used to be a Janitor and some Ladies left some of the training materials behind.
If you want to get us to stop looking at other ladies while you are out in public with him. Tell him you do not mind him looking at her. Once he says ok. Start looking at much younger good looking guys. When he objects, ask him why it is ok for him and not for you. After all, your permission was based on you getting to look too. He will figure it out in about three months. After all, us guys are slowwwww.