I guess this is a reflection / venting I am not sure

[ciicii]

This is just a reflection,

I know I already posted about this but I guess I just need to write out my thoughts for a moment. I have a friend who has struggled a lot with bad choices. And I do think I have some gift of discernment. But the issue is that I also struggle a lot with self worth and find it hard to be stern in saying something. I prefer to walk in hope and giving multiple chances.

But My mind can't stop reflecting on my friend who was a bit upset today when he decide to confide in me that he is still going to be a christian but practice homosexuality. I stuck to God and told him that doesn't make sense. It is like saying you are going to continue cheating on your wife, knowing what God says about this, but still attend church with no convictions, accepting that you were born this way so the sin doesn't count. The same can eb true if you choose to live as a liar, a thief, it doesn't matter.

I told him the first part of this, the second part I worded differently. But in my heart it is so clear, so black and white and that is what ends up hitting me so hard and I find so demoralizing. That someone can twist sin in that way and feel no conviction or choose to ignore it.

Can he not see what is happening to him. But then I think of all the signs, the FRUIT of his life ...

You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? - Matthew 7:16
But I have seen in myself and others, that identifying those sinful fruit has become a forbidden topic (??) it is like I feel guilty for identifying a serious problem in behavior for someone who proclaims to believe in the Lord especially for as long as he has been proclaiming the Lord's name.

I try to be very patient and hopeful, sine small progress is still progress, but he is also 27 and at what point can you say, you're an adult and you need to grow up?

He has always had issues with substance abuse as an example, but for the past few years he continues to relapse, but they are in ways that were completely avoidable. He talk to me about considering going back to see someone he used to sleep with or someone he used to smoke with who still practices these life styles and I would talk him out of it, and then at the end he will say he is going to go anyway.

He went on a family trip and he said his family is helping him with boundaries, but he went off to get drunk anyway over the vacation.

He even admitted that he went back to committing fraud, and since we live in a small town we all know each other, and cashed fake cheques in the name of others who we know and love and are believers.

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

I am heart broken and offended all at once. And honestly exhausted from this kind of news from people in my life. I want to pray to God to help these people, but it seems like the people in my life are either already saved which is a blessing or they already have hardened hearts, and praying for them seems hopeless at times.

Like I want to pray for my husband and things just got worse, I want to pray for my friend but I also don't want to be friends with someone who is practicing that lifestyle. I am not their savior, I have to reminded myself of that when I have that itch to help and think I just have to share one more verse, one more testimony, one more second chance.

Please pray for me, but yeah I guess I just want to vent a bit. I know it is our job as ambassadors to share the good news. But I would like some kind of separation, I want a life with a loving husband, loving neighbors all rooted in Christ and a little piece of heaven on earth for a moment and not look at all this darkness.

I hate because it sins against God and I hate it because it genuinely causes my chest to tighten and my soul to stir and ache. I am by no means perfect myself, but I am not a slave to sin where as these people are and I just ... can't

 

[passion84god]

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

I know that you prefer the NKJV, and you might find some divine guidance here:

Ephesians 5:1-17​

Walk in Love​

1 Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma. 3 But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; 4 neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. 5 For this you know, that no fornicator, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 7 Therefore do not be partakers with them.​

Walk in Light​

8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 9 (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), 10 finding out what is acceptable to the Lord. 11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret. 13 But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light. 14 Therefore He says:
​

“Awake, you who sleep,
Arise from the dead,
And Christ will give you light.”

Walk in Wisdom​

15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, 16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.​

 

[Karlon]

This is just a reflection,

I know I already posted about this but I guess I just need to write out my thoughts for a moment. I have a friend who has struggled a lot with bad choices. And I do think I have some gift of discernment. But the issue is that I also struggle a lot with self worth and find it hard to be stern in saying something. I prefer to walk in hope and giving multiple chances.

But My mind can't stop reflecting on my friend who was a bit upset today when he decide to confide in me that he is still going to be a christian but practice homosexuality. I stuck to God and told him that doesn't make sense. It is like saying you are going to continue cheating on your wife, knowing what God says about this, but still attend church with no convictions, accepting that you were born this way so the sin doesn't count. The same can eb true if you choose to live as a liar, a thief, it doesn't matter.

I told him the first part of this, the second part I worded differently. But in my heart it is so clear, so black and white and that is what ends up hitting me so hard and I find so demoralizing. That someone can twist sin in that way and feel no conviction or choose to ignore it.

Can he not see what is happening to him. But then I think of all the signs, the FRUIT of his life ...

You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? - Matthew 7:16
But I have seen in myself and others, that identifying those sinful fruit has become a forbidden topic (??) it is like I feel guilty for identifying a serious problem in behavior for someone who proclaims to believe in the Lord especially for as long as he has been proclaiming the Lord's name.

I try to be very patient and hopeful, sine small progress is still progress, but he is also 27 and at what point can you say, you're an adult and you need to grow up?

He has always had issues with substance abuse as an example, but for the past few years he continues to relapse, but they are in ways that were completely avoidable. He talk to me about considering going back to see someone he used to sleep with or someone he used to smoke with who still practices these life styles and I would talk him out of it, and then at the end he will say he is going to go anyway.

He went on a family trip and he said his family is helping him with boundaries, but he went off to get drunk anyway over the vacation.

He even admitted that he went back to committing fraud, and since we live in a small town we all know each other, and cashed fake cheques in the name of others who we know and love and are believers.

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

I am heart broken and offended all at once. And honestly exhausted from this kind of news from people in my life. I want to pray to God to help these people, but it seems like the people in my life are either already saved which is a blessing or they already have hardened hearts, and praying for them seems hopeless at times.

Like I want to pray for my husband and things just got worse, I want to pray for my friend but I also don't want to be friends with someone who is practicing that lifestyle. I am not their savior, I have to reminded myself of that when I have that itch to help and think I just have to share one more verse, one more testimony, one more second chance.

Please pray for me, but yeah I guess I just want to vent a bit. I know it is our job as ambassadors to share the good news. But I would like some kind of separation, I want a life with a loving husband, loving neighbors all rooted in Christ and a little piece of heaven on earth for a moment and not look at all this darkness.

I hate because it sins against God and I hate it because it genuinely causes my chest to tighten and my soul to stir and ache. I am by no means perfect myself, but I am not a slave to sin where as these people are and I just ... can't

i will pray for your friend. i used to struggle with self worth, thinking that i am worthy in area of life. my brothers & i were constantly being beaten physically, spiritually & mentally. it sounds like you love your friend in a Christian way. i'm here to teach you it is impossible to be a Christian & live the homosexual life. TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE! NEVER HAPPENED, NEVER WILL HAPPEN! & no one is born lesbian or homosexual either. the devil tempts the weak & they fall for it. he may have realized he is wrong with these choices in his mind but doesn't have the strength to regenerate his thoughts, speakings & actions to a Jesus lifestyle. he needs to be convicted, converted & transformed to Jesus. show him Romans 12:2, Psalm 37:23, Galatians 5:16, 1st John 2:15, 17. if you know him really well, ask if he will sit with you & engage in a huge teaching lesson. tell him he has talents, make him feel wanted, worthy, accepted, point out all his good attributes. plan your speech & practice. speak to him with the confidence of a 50 year teacher. blessings to you.

 

[ciicii]

I know that you prefer the NKJV, and you might find some divine guidance here:

Ephesians 5:1-17​

Walk in Love​

1 Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma. 3 But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; 4 neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. 5 For this you know, that no fornicator, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 7 Therefore do not be partakers with them.​

Walk in Light​

8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 9 (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), 10 finding out what is acceptable to the Lord. 11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret. 13 But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light. 14 Therefore He says:
​

“Awake, you who sleep,
Arise from the dead,
And Christ will give you light.”

Walk in Wisdom​

15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, 16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.​

I agree with this. I don't try to come off as combative specifically because of verse 8 FOR YOU WERE ONCE DARKNESS.

The bother is a serious ache in my soul though. Thanks for this ... re-reading I think v17 is something I need to pay attention to too as maybe a verse study. There is a way o be understanding like Christ without affirming sin. I would like to get better there. (these are just internal thoughts but writing anyway) lol

 

[Suze]

This is just a reflection,

I know I already posted about this but I guess I just need to write out my thoughts for a moment. I have a friend who has struggled a lot with bad choices. And I do think I have some gift of discernment. But the issue is that I also struggle a lot with self worth and find it hard to be stern in saying something. I prefer to walk in hope and giving multiple chances.

But My mind can't stop reflecting on my friend who was a bit upset today when he decide to confide in me that he is still going to be a christian but practice homosexuality. I stuck to God and told him that doesn't make sense. It is like saying you are going to continue cheating on your wife, knowing what God says about this, but still attend church with no convictions, accepting that you were born this way so the sin doesn't count. The same can eb true if you choose to live as a liar, a thief, it doesn't matter.

I told him the first part of this, the second part I worded differently. But in my heart it is so clear, so black and white and that is what ends up hitting me so hard and I find so demoralizing. That someone can twist sin in that way and feel no conviction or choose to ignore it.

Can he not see what is happening to him. But then I think of all the signs, the FRUIT of his life ...

You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? - Matthew 7:16
But I have seen in myself and others, that identifying those sinful fruit has become a forbidden topic (??) it is like I feel guilty for identifying a serious problem in behavior for someone who proclaims to believe in the Lord especially for as long as he has been proclaiming the Lord's name.

I try to be very patient and hopeful, sine small progress is still progress, but he is also 27 and at what point can you say, you're an adult and you need to grow up?

He has always had issues with substance abuse as an example, but for the past few years he continues to relapse, but they are in ways that were completely avoidable. He talk to me about considering going back to see someone he used to sleep with or someone he used to smoke with who still practices these life styles and I would talk him out of it, and then at the end he will say he is going to go anyway.

He went on a family trip and he said his family is helping him with boundaries, but he went off to get drunk anyway over the vacation.

He even admitted that he went back to committing fraud, and since we live in a small town we all know each other, and cashed fake cheques in the name of others who we know and love and are believers.

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

I am heart broken and offended all at once. And honestly exhausted from this kind of news from people in my life. I want to pray to God to help these people, but it seems like the people in my life are either already saved which is a blessing or they already have hardened hearts, and praying for them seems hopeless at times.

Like I want to pray for my husband and things just got worse, I want to pray for my friend but I also don't want to be friends with someone who is practicing that lifestyle. I am not their savior, I have to reminded myself of that when I have that itch to help and think I just have to share one more verse, one more testimony, one more second chance.

Please pray for me, but yeah I guess I just want to vent a bit. I know it is our job as ambassadors to share the good news. But I would like some kind of separation, I want a life with a loving husband, loving neighbors all rooted in Christ and a little piece of heaven on earth for a moment and not look at all this darkness.

I hate because it sins against God and I hate it because it genuinely causes my chest to tighten and my soul to stir and ache. I am by no means perfect myself, but I am not a slave to sin where as these people are and I just ... can't

I'm very sorry for u because u sound like such a good friend to have but , your friends r not respecting u or your God . It seems as if these people r all adults and all have access to a Bible and a church , if they wanted them .
Know this , that we cannot save other people and that people will not change unless they want to . These r things that I have learned by my own experience . Know also , u have to protect yourself , physically , mentally , emotionally and spiritually . U r not entitled to put yourself at risk , u belong to Jesus and u must respect what he has done for u . These people that u r telling us about r not stupid , they know what they r supposed to do and what they r not supposed to do , they r not infants . They r adults choosing to do things that r not Christian and they know it . Maybe one day they will change and devote themselves to the Truth but , u won't b able to make them no matter what u do or say . Always b polite and respectful to everyone that u have any contact with , however , u r not entitled to put yourself at risk by regularly associating with people who r professing Christ with their mouths but not their actions . If u were my daughter , I would advise u to move away from them and build some new friendships with other people , preferably Christians , and not with amoral criminals . There r plenty of atheists that wouldn't do what these people r doing ! U r very precious and bought with a high price . Stay cordial but , spend as little time as possible with these folks in case they get u embroiled in one of their little scemes , maybe even without u knowing it ! God bless and keep u safe sister .

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

This is just a reflection,

I know I already posted about this but I guess I just need to write out my thoughts for a moment. I have a friend who has struggled a lot with bad choices. And I do think I have some gift of discernment. But the issue is that I also struggle a lot with self worth and find it hard to be stern in saying something. I prefer to walk in hope and giving multiple chances.

But My mind can't stop reflecting on my friend who was a bit upset today when he decide to confide in me that he is still going to be a christian but practice homosexuality. I stuck to God and told him that doesn't make sense. It is like saying you are going to continue cheating on your wife, knowing what God says about this, but still attend church with no convictions, accepting that you were born this way so the sin doesn't count. The same can eb true if you choose to live as a liar, a thief, it doesn't matter.

I told him the first part of this, the second part I worded differently. But in my heart it is so clear, so black and white and that is what ends up hitting me so hard and I find so demoralizing. That someone can twist sin in that way and feel no conviction or choose to ignore it.

Can he not see what is happening to him. But then I think of all the signs, the FRUIT of his life ...

You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? - Matthew 7:16
But I have seen in myself and others, that identifying those sinful fruit has become a forbidden topic (??) it is like I feel guilty for identifying a serious problem in behavior for someone who proclaims to believe in the Lord especially for as long as he has been proclaiming the Lord's name.

I try to be very patient and hopeful, sine small progress is still progress, but he is also 27 and at what point can you say, you're an adult and you need to grow up?

He has always had issues with substance abuse as an example, but for the past few years he continues to relapse, but they are in ways that were completely avoidable. He talk to me about considering going back to see someone he used to sleep with or someone he used to smoke with who still practices these life styles and I would talk him out of it, and then at the end he will say he is going to go anyway.

He went on a family trip and he said his family is helping him with boundaries, but he went off to get drunk anyway over the vacation.

He even admitted that he went back to committing fraud, and since we live in a small town we all know each other, and cashed fake cheques in the name of others who we know and love and are believers.

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

Jesus doesn't know him.
He's an unbeliever.
That's what Jesus is talking about in Matthew 7:21 KJV.
There's a LOT of people, even preachers who proclaimed the name of Christ, who prophesied cast out devils and done many wonderful WORKS. Their problem was that they were not fully trusting the Savior. They were trusting themselves as deserving because of their works.

"It's Not by works of righteousness which we have done..."
Titus 3:5 KJV
Your friend is not saved.
It's not because he decided to not reform in turning from his hundred different sins to obedience to keeping the laws.
It's because his faith is mixed with faith in self. Sodomites are known for being prideful. It's not just them, but anyone who thinks they are good enough in the least to pay for sins. Only Jesus did that.

He's homo because either:

A. He's young, his momma bottle fed him soy and he's still on the high estrogen stuff, impressionable, was molested by a sodomite as a boy but still didn't cross the line.
OR
B. He crossed the line and rejected the God of the Bible in his thinking, so he was turned over to a reprobate mind.
Read Romans 1 KJV for details on this.
My default is to assume point A and lead them to Christ.

I can provide a sermon on the subject for the asking.
He needs to get saved so I will include a gospel presentation that you may share with him if you are not experienced leading others to Christ. I have a bunch of different ones free for the asking.
Gospel of Jesus Christ
I will pray that he gets saved.
Feel free to ask if you have any questions.

 

[ciicii]

i will pray for your friend. i used to struggle with self worth, thinking that i am worthy in area of life. my brothers & i were constantly being beaten physically, spiritually & mentally. it sounds like you love your friend in a Christian way. i'm here to teach you it is impossible to be a Christian & live the homosexual life. TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE! NEVER HAPPENED, NEVER WILL HAPPEN! & no one is born lesbian or homosexual either. the devil tempts the weak & they fall for it. he may have realized he is wrong with these choices in his mind but doesn't have the strength to regenerate his thoughts, speakings & actions to a Jesus lifestyle. he needs to be convicted, converted & transformed to Jesus. show him Romans 12:2, Psalm 37:23, Galatians 5:16, 1st John 2:15, 17. if you know him really well, ask if he will sit with you & engage in a huge teaching lesson. tell him he has talents, make him feel wanted, worthy, accepted, point out all his good attributes. plan your speech & practice. speak to him with the confidence of a 50 year teacher. blessings to you.

Amen I agree with you one this.

When you say no one is born that way either I know what you mean and I agree. I meant technically is born fallen and with their vices. But no one is born gay in the way they use it like, it is God's design for them.

I am so sorry that you went through that kind of abuse, I have experiences things like this too it is not easy at all and I pray you are still healing from it, and glad you are in Christ, so he is with you. Thank you for your prayers for my friend too.

The way he said it to me, I think maybe he wanted to let me know but I don't think he wanted help either, he was very defensive when I told him that you cannot follow God and actively choose to live a gay lifestyle. And I told him you can't love God and disobey his words on purpose, and it will end with him not being with God when his judgement comes and he just said - I know.

Right now I know a big thing that he needs to do is read his bible, he never does that. I have seen a pattern of people in my life say they feel like they are beign spoken too becuase they are so out of their element and don't know how to make connections, but they claim to be christians for years and have only opened their bibles a few times and often only when initiated by others. I would love for him to start there and have God speak to him directly through his word.

Maybe that would be the opening to do a bible study or something, just reading the gospels. I am not sure.

I think for a logn time he has wanted family and companionship and some sense of direction since he has alwasy been very nervous and desperate, which cuases him to do things that arent' right. But he is also so kind, and empathetic and I tell him he should use those strengths to help others dealing with addiction or maybe even pursue becoming a councilor. But he didn't listen.

I would love to have a sit and talk with him too, but I need prayer for there to be an opening and for my eyes to be able to see that opening if God is willing to use me.

 

[ciicii]

I'm very sorry for u because u sound like such a good friend to have but , your friends r not respecting u or your God . It seems as if these people r all adults and all have access to a Bible and a church , if they wanted them .
Know this , that we cannot save other people and that people will not change unless they want to . These r things that I have learned by my own experience . Know also , u have to protect yourself , physically , mentally , emotionally and spiritually . U r not entitled to put yourself at risk , u belong to Jesus and u must respect what he has done for u . These people that u r telling us about r not stupid , they know what they r supposed to do and what they r not supposed to do , they r not infants . They r adults choosing to do things that r not Christian and they know it . Maybe one day they will change and devote themselves to the Truth but , u won't b able to make them no matter what u do or say . Always b polite and respectful to everyone that u have any contact with , however , u r not entitled to put yourself at risk by regularly associating with people who r professing Christ with their mouths but not their actions . If u were my daughter , I would advise u to move away from them and build some new friendships with other people , preferably Christians , and not with amoral criminals . There r plenty of atheists that wouldn't do what these people r doing ! U r very precious and bought with a high price . Stay cordial but , spend as little time as possible with these folks in case they get u embroiled in one of their little scemes , maybe even without u knowing it ! God bless and keep u safe sister .

Thank you so much.

And yeah I keep on acting as though these people are children in need of saving from themselves when they are grown adults. I tend to get attached, and don't want to see people get hurt ig.

Thank you though, I have tried to make new Christian friends and be much more honest with myself and the actions of others who claim Christ to avoid getting hurt. we all need support at the end of the day to uplift one another and mine can't be from fake christian that require me to give them the benefit of the doubt and a blind eye.

I will still pray for them of course though! Thank you for the advice

If u were my daughter , I would advise u to move away from them and build some new friendships with other people , preferably Christians , and not with amoral criminals .

I do need more christian friends and I have managed to actually find one friend in real life that is a devout christian and we are always at church and have a lot of deep conversation about Christ and I can see through both our actions that we are following the Lord and helping each other.

I am praying I can continue building fruitful relationship like that and have 2 or 3 close friends in the faith to confide in and spend time with.

I think that would help a lot with giving me the strength to be kind and respectful and much more patient with other 'friends' who keep on doing these kinds of things. As of now I tend to keep conversations short because I revert to just holding my tongue and then coming on here or friends to explain my heart, I have been at a loss as of late since this particular sin continue to follow me and destroy my life and the lives of the people in my own life.

I think bible study on Godly friendships as well would be beneficial. I remember the friendship between David and Jerimiah and the brotherly love they had for one another in Christ that was thicker than blood and I have always wanted that with everyone I meet. But I know that is not possible with everyone.

 

[ciicii]

Jesus doesn't know him.
He's an unbeliever.
That's what Jesus is talking about in Matthew 7:21 KJV.
There's a LOT of people, even preachers who proclaimed the name of Christ, who prophesied cast out devils and done many wonderful WORKS. Their problem was that they were not fully trusting the Savior. They were trusting themselves as deserving because of their works.

"It's Not by works of righteousness which we have done..."
Titus 3:5 KJV
Your friend is not saved.
It's not because he decided to not reform in turning from his hundred different sins to obedience to keeping the laws.
It's because his faith is mixed with faith in self. Sodomites are known for being prideful. It's not just them, but anyone who thinks they are good enough in the least to pay for sins. Only Jesus did that.

He's homo because either:

A. He's young, his momma bottle fed him soy and he's still on the high estrogen stuff, impressionable, was molested by a sodomite as a boy but still didn't cross the line.
OR
B. He crossed the line and rejected the God of the Bible in his thinking, so he was turned over to a reprobate mind.
Read Romans 1 KJV for details on this.
My default is to assume point A and lead them to Christ.

I can provide a sermon on the subject for the asking.
He needs to get saved so I will include a gospel presentation that you may share with him if you are not experienced leading others to Christ. I have a bunch of different ones free for the asking.
Gospel of Jesus Christ
I will pray that he gets saved.
Feel free to ask if you have any questions.

I don't necessarily agree with the soy thing XD but I do agree that he is at the very leas ifeminate and there is a lot fo trauma in his life and lack of a father figure amongst other things.

I know he is not saved though that is what bothers me, and I have known this for a very long time, I just prayed there would be some change because we are told to be patient, and waitig on God's timing.

I know that even Jesus walked away, but my biggest question is - how do you know when it is time to officially walk away?

I enjoy the content from Brett Cooper he was a his society Hollywood boy who was gay before coming to Christ and interviews others who have struggled with the same sin, but there is always conviction in their stories, clear effort and desire. That has not been in either of the people in my recent life. So maybe it is time to walk away and pray from a distance I am not sure.

personally I feel bad leaving him when the last thing he said is 'i am going to be gay and 'christian'" that is just not possible, but will he think Christians are unloving because I have made that boundary or cut off. Is that even something I should be worrying about? idk.

Thank you for the video you shared too. if you have anything else though yes please share it. I go through everything people send me (a bit slow but it is better than the modern shows on tv lol)

 

[Karlon]

Amen I agree with you one this.

When you say no one is born that way either I know what you mean and I agree. I meant technically is born fallen and with their vices. But no one is born gay in the way they use it like, it is God's design for them.

I am so sorry that you went through that kind of abuse, I have experiences things like this too it is not easy at all and I pray you are still healing from it, and glad you are in Christ, so he is with you. Thank you for your prayers for my friend too.

The way he said it to me, I think maybe he wanted to let me know but I don't think he wanted help either, he was very defensive when I told him that you cannot follow God and actively choose to live a gay lifestyle. And I told him you can't love God and disobey his words on purpose, and it will end with him not being with God when his judgement comes and he just said - I know.

Right now I know a big thing that he needs to do is read his bible, he never does that. I have seen a pattern of people in my life say they feel like they are beign spoken too becuase they are so out of their element and don't know how to make connections, but they claim to be christians for years and have only opened their bibles a few times and often only when initiated by others. I would love for him to start there and have God speak to him directly through his word.

Maybe that would be the opening to do a bible study or something, just reading the gospels. I am not sure.

I think for a logn time he has wanted family and companionship and some sense of direction since he has alwasy been very nervous and desperate, which cuases him to do things that arent' right. But he is also so kind, and empathetic and I tell him he should use those strengths to help others dealing with addiction or maybe even pursue becoming a councilor. But he didn't listen.

I would love to have a sit and talk with him too, but I need prayer for there to be an opening and for my eyes to be able to see that opening if God is willing to use me.

don't tarry, move on this fast. perhaps the bigger reason people never straighten up is the procrastination period.

 

[Lynx]

This is just a reflection,

I know I already posted about this but I guess I just need to write out my thoughts for a moment. I have a friend who has struggled a lot with bad choices. And I do think I have some gift of discernment. But the issue is that I also struggle a lot with self worth and find it hard to be stern in saying something. I prefer to walk in hope and giving multiple chances.

But My mind can't stop reflecting on my friend who was a bit upset today when he decide to confide in me that he is still going to be a christian but practice homosexuality. I stuck to God and told him that doesn't make sense. It is like saying you are going to continue cheating on your wife, knowing what God says about this, but still attend church with no convictions, accepting that you were born this way so the sin doesn't count. The same can eb true if you choose to live as a liar, a thief, it doesn't matter.

I told him the first part of this, the second part I worded differently. But in my heart it is so clear, so black and white and that is what ends up hitting me so hard and I find so demoralizing. That someone can twist sin in that way and feel no conviction or choose to ignore it.

Can he not see what is happening to him. But then I think of all the signs, the FRUIT of his life ...

You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? - Matthew 7:16
But I have seen in myself and others, that identifying those sinful fruit has become a forbidden topic (??) it is like I feel guilty for identifying a serious problem in behavior for someone who proclaims to believe in the Lord especially for as long as he has been proclaiming the Lord's name.

I try to be very patient and hopeful, sine small progress is still progress, but he is also 27 and at what point can you say, you're an adult and you need to grow up?

He has always had issues with substance abuse as an example, but for the past few years he continues to relapse, but they are in ways that were completely avoidable. He talk to me about considering going back to see someone he used to sleep with or someone he used to smoke with who still practices these life styles and I would talk him out of it, and then at the end he will say he is going to go anyway.

He went on a family trip and he said his family is helping him with boundaries, but he went off to get drunk anyway over the vacation.

He even admitted that he went back to committing fraud, and since we live in a small town we all know each other, and cashed fake cheques in the name of others who we know and love and are believers.

I look at this and feel bad saying - You aren't saved, a Christian wouldn't do these things, a 'good person' who doesn't believe wouldn't do these things. And I know it isn't my life, but it genuinely bothers me when people I know choose to do these things and also still fool themselves into believing what they are doing is right.

I am heart broken and offended all at once. And honestly exhausted from this kind of news from people in my life. I want to pray to God to help these people, but it seems like the people in my life are either already saved which is a blessing or they already have hardened hearts, and praying for them seems hopeless at times.

Like I want to pray for my husband and things just got worse, I want to pray for my friend but I also don't want to be friends with someone who is practicing that lifestyle. I am not their savior, I have to reminded myself of that when I have that itch to help and think I just have to share one more verse, one more testimony, one more second chance.

Please pray for me, but yeah I guess I just want to vent a bit. I know it is our job as ambassadors to share the good news. But I would like some kind of separation, I want a life with a loving husband, loving neighbors all rooted in Christ and a little piece of heaven on earth for a moment and not look at all this darkness.

I hate because it sins against God and I hate it because it genuinely causes my chest to tighten and my soul to stir and ache. I am by no means perfect myself, but I am not a slave to sin where as these people are and I just ... can't

You will get many different opinions on an open forum. Most of them will conflict with each other, and with what you believe.

If I had to put in my two cents I would say to just be his friend. Do not EVER condone his sin, but don't harp on it either. Just be a friend.

If he makes it a condition of friendship that you condone his sin, leave. But until then, be a friend.

 

[ciicii]

don't tarry, move on this fast. perhaps the bigger reason people never straighten up is the procrastination period.

That is true, i agree this world has become much softer. I will take that advice.

 

[ciicii]

You will get many different opinions on an open forum. Most of them will conflict with each other, and with what you believe.

If I had to put in my two cents I would say to just be his friend. Do not EVER condone his sin, but don't harp on it either. Just be a friend.

If he makes it a condition of friendship that you condone his sin, leave. But until then, be a friend.

thank you this was well put in a way i can understand without question / wiggle room. thank you again so much <3

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

I don't necessarily agree with the soy thing XD but I do agree that he is at the very leas ifeminate and there is a lot fo trauma in his life and lack of a father figure amongst other things.

Those are common traits and backgrounds. Some young men and women decide to leave those damaging experiences in the past and others embrace them and their sins (Romans 1 KJV) escalate regardless of Christian friends who want to influence them.

I know he is not saved though that is what bothers me, and I have known this for a very long time, I just prayed there would be some change because we are told to be patient, and waitig on God's timing.

I know that even Jesus walked away, but my biggest question is - how do you know when it is time to officially walk away?

Is this your husband?
I ask because you mentioned in your bio that you are separated.

I enjoy the content from Brett Cooper he was a his society Hollywood boy who was gay before coming to Christ and interviews others who have struggled with the same sin, but there is always conviction in their stories, clear effort and desire. That has not been in either of the people in my recent life. So maybe it is time to walk away and pray from a distance I am not sure.

I'll look up one of his testimonies.

personally I feel bad leaving him when the last thing he said is 'i am going to be gay and 'christian'" that is just not possible, but will he think Christians are unloving because I have made that boundary or cut off. Is that even something I should be worrying about? idk.

Thank you for the video you shared too. if you have anything else though yes please share it. I go through everything people send me (a bit slow but it is better than the modern shows on tv lol)

 

[ciicii]

Those are common traits and backgrounds. Some young men and women decide to leave those damaging experiences in the past and others embrace them and their sins (Romans 1 KJV) escalate regardless of Christian friends who want to influence them.


Is this your husband?
I ask because you mentioned in your bio that you are separated.

I'll look up one of his testimonies.

Not for this specific reflection, this si a childhood friend that has been deal with a lot of stuff. But my 'husband' has also said that he has been repressing this as soon as the therapist told him that that is what it was becuase of a memory of wearign his mothers shoes when he was an infant once. I choose not to think about that nonsense.

I'll look up one of his testimonies.

please let me know what you think, he has been a great help and escape for people who want to escape that lifestyle and follow Christ he is empathetic but never falters on truth I have never met anyone else like him evangelizing in this field.

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

Not for this specific reflection, this si a childhood friend that has been deal with a lot of stuff. But my 'husband' has also said that he has been repressing this as soon as the therapist told him that that is what it was becuase of a memory of wearign his mothers shoes when he was an infant once. I choose not to think about that nonsense.

I hope you both can reconcile and he gets a therapist who is Biblically helpful.

please let me know what you think, he has been a great help and escape for people who want to escape that lifestyle and follow Christ he is empathetic but never falters on truth I have never met anyone else like him evangelizing in this field.

I searched the name and got a woman in the search results for YouTube. Can you post a link for me?

 

[ciicii]

I searched the name and got a woman in the search results for YouTube. Can you post a link for me?

oh my goodness sorry I always say bret cooper for some reason i don't know why I meant becket cook

https://www.youtube.com/@BecketCook

I hope you both can reconcile and he gets a therapist who is Biblically helpful.

And thank you me too, I do have a bible based coucnilor that has helped me a lot but my husband has rejected it and so has my friend. I think he just wants family and belong (my friend) so he hasn't left the church in habit but has not come to Christ so he still feels lonely amongst people.
And my husband ... honestly I cant' force him, and have given him all the tools I can so it is up to him. He has made it clear he wants a divorce I can't stall it more than I have - ironically this is the hardest he's fought for anything, so if he does get saved I think he needs to really hit rock bottom first, like the prodigal son.

I have a hard time thinking that but, yeah just focusing on myself now and God

 

[Delvianna]

I'm sorry to hear your friend is struggling and that's causing you to struggle with the friend. I understand where you're coming from as I also tend to try to go above and beyond to help those around me but I wanted to share some things that I've learned along the way.

1) You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. Continuing to talk to him about the gospel isn't going to convict him, only God can do that. He knows scripture, and he's actively choosing to go the other direction. There comes a point when you just have to let people make their own bad decisions, but that doesn't mean you have to be in the vicinity of them making it.

2) So to answer a question you had in one of your replies, how do you know it's time to walk away, when their actions refuse to walk in a Christ-like manner and it's gotten to a point where his presence is a bad influence. Which, is already at this point.

3) YOUR walk with Christ is FAR more important than you trying to fix or help someone. As you stated, you are not his savior, so stop feeling like it's your job to save him by thinking or coming up with ways to try and change him (just reading the bible to him like you mentioned in another comment). You explained your piece, that is all you can do.

My suggestion would be to pull away from him. Put up a boundary that while he's decided to live in this lifestyle of being gay and all the other illegal things he's decided to do, that you cannot be his friend because you would be enabling that behavior and it would be hindering your own walk. Because it's not like he wouldn't affect you.

"Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”" - 1 Corinthians 15:33

You'd hear of who he was with, probably meet them as a couple at some point. You would be putting yourself in the position that it looks like you're condoning his actions which goes against what Paul says.

1 Corinthians 5:11 - But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner—not even to eat with such a person.

If he repents and comes back, accept him again with open arms but sometimes it's the will of God to give them over to their lusts and desires because through that, he might be able to be saved.

I hope this helps <3

 

[ciicii]

I'm sorry to hear your friend is struggling and that's causing you to struggle with the friend. I understand where you're coming from as I also tend to try to go above and beyond to help those around me but I wanted to share some things that I've learned along the way.

1) You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. Continuing to talk to him about the gospel isn't going to convict him, only God can do that. He knows scripture, and he's actively choosing to go the other direction. There comes a point when you just have to let people make their own bad decisions, but that doesn't mean you have to be in the vicinity of them making it.

2) So to answer a question you had in one of your replies, how do you know it's time to walk away, when their actions refuse to walk in a Christ-like manner and it's gotten to a point where his presence is a bad influence. Which, is already at this point.

3) YOUR walk with Christ is FAR more important than you trying to fix or help someone. As you stated, you are not his savior, so stop feeling like it's your job to save him by thinking or coming up with ways to try and change him (just reading the bible to him like you mentioned in another comment). You explained your piece, that is all you can do.

My suggestion would be to pull away from him. Put up a boundary that while he's decided to live in this lifestyle of being gay and all the other illegal things he's decided to do, that you cannot be his friend because you would be enabling that behavior and it would be hindering your own walk. Because it's not like he wouldn't affect you.

You'd hear of who he was with, probably meet them as a couple at some point. You would be putting yourself in the position that it looks like you're condoning his actions which goes against what Paul says.


If he repents and comes back, accept him again with open arms but sometimes it's the will of God to give them over to their lusts and desires because through that, he might be able to be saved.

I hope this helps <3

wow thank you your advice really helped actually especially when you quoted scripture, i think that was what I was missing. I was not sure if I was being harsh and giving up meant I was neglecting in a way. thank you again this actually really did help me with both situations.

 

[Delvianna]

wow thank you your advice really helped actually especially when you quoted scripture, i think that was what I was missing. I was not sure if I was being harsh and giving up meant I was neglecting in a way. thank you again this actually really did help me with both situations.

You're so welcome, glad it helped! God bless!