I intovertedness a learned behavior?

[Nautilus]

So I'm just curious the older I get the more I want to do things alone..Is this normal or late term introvertedness? Like honestly most nights I'd rather be alone and chat on here versus dealing with a second party in real life...Its just...nominally so calm and peaceful here.

 

[Liamson]

Carl Jung invented these concepts we call introversion and extroversion.


Basically, introverts find social dynamics draining.

So if you find yourself drained or obligated by the thought of having someone around, you are probably an introvert.

He believe it was more of an innate dynamics than a learned one.

Also I believe that most people are introverts. Not necessarily the Lock yourself in a tower with books like Merlin, hard introvert, but nonetheless preferring the company of the self over the others.

 

[zeroturbulence]

I think it has to do with personal stress levels. Someone like me who has a certain level of stress in their life (whether it be emotional or physical) usually just wants to relax and get away from everything and everyone. (And hopefully do something fun to pass the time).

Some call it introvertedness. I call it saving my sanity.

 

[just_monicat]

to continue on liamson's point, a true extrovert gains energy from social interaction. therefore, it's actually a stress release and recharging event to be around other people.

and it's very common for people to slide over in all of the measurable aspects of personality.

for example, when i was about 20 and tested with the meyers brigg (personality test) i was a fairly severe ENFP on all qualities. i definitely thrived and preferred social contact, and my life was a reflection of that. and then i grew up and a lot of that changed.

i retested at the age of 32, and i was still on the ENFP side, but would be described as mild extrovert, and far more central in the other qualities as well.

i'm fairly convinced that if i tested today that i would be probably close to the middle. my personal belief is that as you mature and grow, (especially as a Christian) you become more tolerant and accepting of vocational/environmental limitations and challenges which, like any muscle, will create strength where there is weakness. isn't that cool that we have the capacity to evolve in so many ways?

living alone has definitely made me far more introverted, however, i would go bat crazy without a fair amount of contact and my animals.

so yes, people do change, and it would be unusual if they don't shift at least somewhat. i also know a couple painfully shy introverts who have slid way over to the more neutral position.

 

[Jullianna]

I was far more outgoing as a child than I am now. I was shy around strangers, but very friendly...if that makes sense.

My stepdad was in the military and we moved a LOT growing up, so I kept having to break ties with people. Somewhere around jr high I stopped trying to get to know people and decided that books were easier. I did not have to leave them behind.

The most difficult thing for me is making small talk. I hate it. I really, really, really, really hate it. I would rather Superglue my fingers together. Seriously. People who feel the need to fill every.single.moment. yakking about stuff make my ears bleed. I think this may be why my very best friend is my dog. He gets this about me.

I've talked with God about this. If He wanted me to behave, I don't know why He put all of these other people here. Most days I can't wait to get home (except when it's really cold...like now *sigh*), kick off my heels, don my running shoes and take off by myself. I think my job has a LOT to do with this.

I think this is why I spend so much time here. Most of you are just like me in this regard. I love you guys *sniffle*

 

[persNickety]

I'm not sure that it's completely learned, but an expression of your temperament. Nature and nurture. I was reading Quiet: The power of an introvert in a world that won't stop talking. Often children/ people that are introverts were sensitive (highly reactive) babies, meaning they are more reactive to stimulation, than low reactive babies (extroverts).

"Cain maintains that there are introverts and extroverts in almost every species of the animal kingdom, each having a corresponding survival strategy.[21] She says that research indicates our own degree of introversion or extroversion is detectable in infants and likely to be innate,[12] and about 50% heritable (half by nature, half by nurture).[27] Babies who are more highly reactive (more sensitive) to stimulation are more likely to develop into introverts, while less reactive (less sensitive) babies generally become extroverts who actually draw on the energy around them.[12] Introverts appear to be less responsive than extroverts to dopamine (a brain chemical linked to reward-driven learning), and have a more circumspect and cautious approach to risk than do extroverts.[3] Introverts are more governed by the neocortex, the part of the brain responsible for thinking, planning, language and decision making.[12]"

So introversion is biological too.

Personally, as I have aged, I have been more accepting of my introversion and been living it out

 

[homwardbound]

So I'm just curious the older I get the more I want to do things alone..Is this normal or late term introvertedness? Like honestly most nights I'd rather be alone and chat on here versus dealing with a second party in real life...Its just...nominally so calm and peaceful here.

A lot less distraction when alone and many times can think clearer, not that it is bad to not alone, yet we all do need alone time to hear Spiritually anyway/
I think that is why god gave us two ears to hear twice as much as we speak.

 

[IloveyouGod]

Take Myers-Briggs assessment. It's pretty good. You'll find out all the answers about yourself.

So I'm just curious the older I get the more I want to do things alone..Is this normal or late term introvertedness? Like honestly most nights I'd rather be alone and chat on here versus dealing with a second party in real life...Its just...nominally so calm and peaceful here.

 

[1still_waters]

It can be learned.

Someone who has been socially rejected due to no fault of their own, or who has received pain from people for whatever reason, over time will be conditioned to believe people equal pain, thus it will result in them avoiding said pain. Meaning "introversion".

Someone who has been socially accepted by praise, friendships, etc, will be conditioned to believe people/groups equates to pleasure, thus they'll learn to seek the pleasure.

We tend to seek that which gives pleasure, and avoid that which brings pain. If introversion helps one avoid the pain of rejection, abuse, whatever, then of course they'll be introverted. Which means introversion may not be all natural.

 

[AAAPlus]

I'd like to clear up a HUGE misconception here: being an introvert does NOT mean you're drained by social situations. There is a very WRONG stipulation that introverts are anti-social. Being an introvert simply means that you are often drained by large group social situations (often meaning more than three people), and like anything, it can vary from situation to situation. Introverts tend towards smaller social interactions with just one or two other people, and are often very energized by that. In addition, most introverts value their alone time, while too much alone time can be draining on extroverts.

 

[Donkeyfish07]

It's my personal belief (Not saying it's a fact, just a belief)....that it's a learned behavior. We're meant to be social creatures. I'm naturally an extrovert that learned introversion. I like to be social and I like to have a good social life....but not TOO much attention. If I'm completely extroverted all the time, I get too many friends and get smothered. Like at one of my old jobs, I just got too personal with everyone there and it got to the point I couldn't go outside to take a breather without someone following me that wanted to talk.....yet if I get in one of my introverted phases, I can isolate myself for weeks or even months a time to the point where my good friends get insulted at my lack of communication. Getting back into the flow of larger social gatherings is challenging after you turtle up for that long but I've went back and forth many times.

I try to balance having that human connection with people we all crave, while avoiding climbing the ladder so high that I get involved in the inevitable social politics that comes with popularity. I only learned to withdraw socially as a teenager to lessen all that social pressure. I've taken a psychology test Ugly posted quite awhile ago, I qualify as an INFP based on the quiz he posted but I'm not sure if that's an accurate label for me or not.

 

[Nautilus]

I just know back a few years back I had to be out doing things. I loved being with friends and going out places. NOw I'm just like man I would love to spend the day at home reading a book or binge-watching whatever my latest tv show is. I still like seeing my friends but I can get the same enjoyment seeing them once a week that I used to need to see them everyday for. I guess it might just be getting older. It just struck me as weird how much my social habits have changed of late.

And I agree completely with the small talk thing jullianna. I cant stand that.

 

[Grace-Like-Rain]

I just know back a few years back I had to be out doing things. I loved being with friends and going out places. NOw I'm just like man I would love to spend the day at home reading a book or binge-watching whatever my latest tv show is. I still like seeing my friends but I can get the same enjoyment seeing them once a week that I used to need to see them everyday for. I guess it might just be getting older. It just struck me as weird how much my social habits have changed of late.

I think we go through "seasons" too. Seasons of social activity, seasons of being content at home. Maybe you are just settling in.

 

[abbiejean]

"I think we go through "seasons" too. Seasons of social activity, seasons of being content at home." Grace-Like-Rain

I agree.

I know in my own life, I was very active, on the go, constantly busy. Involved. Doing.

Now...not so much and I am okay with that. Due in part to life happenings, due in part to own personality and being settled and at peace.

 

[LightningClap0002]

I just know back a few years back I had to be out doing things. I loved being with friends and going out places. NOw I'm just like man I would love to spend the day at home reading a book or binge-watching whatever my latest tv show is. I still like seeing my friends but I can get the same enjoyment seeing them once a week that I used to need to see them everyday for. I guess it might just be getting older. It just struck me as weird how much my social habits have changed of late.

And I agree completely with the small talk thing jullianna. I cant stand that.

I wonder how much of that also comes as a result of the transformation of body and mind talked about in Romans 12:2, 2 Corinthians 3:18 and Philippians 3:21.

I believe a fair number of people have pegged Christ as an INFJ. Becoming more like Christ, whether it be the some supernatural work by the Holy Spirit or some psychological changes just as a result of belief, seems like it would lead us all more towards this even if we keep a lot of our old personality traits.

 

[lil_christian]

For me, whether I'm introverted or extroverted depends on the day of the week for me. It really does. Some days, I just HAVE to get out of the house or I'll go crazy. Go shopping. Get a coffee. SOMETHING besides being alone. Other days, I'm like, "You know, I just wanna play this game or watch this TV show. I'm really enjoying it right now."

When I was a loooot younger, like, elementary school, I was a social butterfly. I loved everyone and always wanted to spend time with people. I think, though, since I had a hard time accepting friends, I didn't spend as much time with kids my age. I rarely went to someone's house for fun. I never found a friend that wanted to do all that stuff with me and I never had kept that friend long enough if I did. (Sorry for that little sad moment there. Don't feel bad for me. I got through it, and I have great friends right now that I don't plan on letting go of. They don't plan on letting go of me, either!)

 

[homwardbound]

It can be learned.

Someone who has been socially rejected due to no fault of their own, or who has received pain from people for whatever reason, over time will be conditioned to believe people equal pain, thus it will result in them avoiding said pain. Meaning "introversion".

Someone who has been socially accepted by praise, friendships, etc, will be conditioned to believe people/groups equates to pleasure, thus they'll learn to seek the pleasure.

We tend to seek that which gives pleasure, and avoid that which brings pain. If introversion helps one avoid the pain of rejection, abuse, whatever, then of course they'll be introverted. Which means introversion may not be all natural.

Which is nothing more than the condition of the flesh
But not the Spirit of God ever, and I see why Christ came was to give us life in the Spirit of God, complete confidence and not feared over what others might think or not.
Smothered and covered in the Living God by and through the Son Christ who has given us the message of reconciliation unto Father, we are a forgiven people by Christ's last sacrifice and last shedding of blood for this to be truth 100%

 

[1still_waters]

All these "introverts" be spending multiple hours every day in a chat room chattin with people.

Food for thought.

 

[FireWire]

It can be learned.

Someone who has been socially rejected due to no fault of their own, or who has received pain from people for whatever reason, over time will be conditioned to believe people equal pain, thus it will result in them avoiding said pain. Meaning "introversion".

Someone who has been socially accepted by praise, friendships, etc, will be conditioned to believe people/groups equates to pleasure, thus they'll learn to seek the pleasure.

We tend to seek that which gives pleasure, and avoid that which brings pain. If introversion helps one avoid the pain of rejection, abuse, whatever, then of course they'll be introverted. Which means introversion may not be all natural.

Yep, that's me

 

[ww_21]

Speaking from personal experience - yes.