J
jj408
Guest
So I am going to summarize what the last five years of my life have been like.Now I don't know what triggered the way I feel now.The summer of 2008 it was really hot out one day and I was pretty thirst so I went inside my uncles house and I looked in his fridge and grabbed a bud light beer. I was only 14 years old when I did this but before all of this I tried weed a couple of times.So back to me grabbing the beer.I drank the beer and fell asleep. About three hours later I woke up and started feeling strange. I thought it was the beer but I knew there was no way it was. I felt like I was floating and everything around felt like it was moving slowly.My hearing was also muffled. I felt like an out of body kind of feeling like I wasn't myself.So that same day I went to the mall with my family and I still felt weird. I thought it would go away the same day but it didn't. The next morning I woke up and I still felt the same.If there was a way I could describe it I would have to say it's like those movie scenes where the main character is on a pain killer and everything feels off and the whole screen goes blurry.Well anyways I have been feeling this way for 5 years now. I feel like this out of body weird feeling 24/7.I also have trouble focusing and I feel spaced out.The worst thing is I don't know what triggered it. I have seen several doctors and specialist but still no results of what it could be. I have also had an MRI,CT scan, and a bunch of blood work. The worst thing is is that starting to affect me mentally. I don't feel the same. Life just doesn't feel the same.I wish I could describe better but it's so hard. The best way to describe it is I feel like I'm not living in the moment and nothing really makes me happy. I also have a lot panic and anxiety attacks. In addition to all of this I have been having identity issues. It's almost like I don't know who I am or what I'm doing on this earth.It's really scary and I need help with it. I made an appointment to see a psychologist but I won't be able to get seen until later next month. I could really use prayer lots and lots of prayer