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Im broken
Thread startercloud19
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im tired of people picking on me at school. Only some people know i have a heart condition im tired of it. I cant get mad because if i do my heart could explode or make me in critical damage. so i just take it im dying slowly and im scared that all the people i helped that they will go back to there time when they were depressed and cutting them self and trying to kill them self i hate this feeling that im going to die at a young age.
Can you talk to your teachers about this? Maybe they can have a talk with those students who are picking on you. I think it's important that the teacher make them aware of your heart condition. It might help them to back off of you some. I am so sorry you are struggling with this. I can't even imagine. I know how it feels to be picked on, and to not be able to become angry when it happens, is even worse. I have a condition where I had to suffer through the same types of things. (it's a neurological condition though, not a heart). I literally had to control all of my emotional responses so that I my muscles would not fail or give out on me. It was the worst time of my life too. I am praying for you hun. Please know that you are loved by God, your family, and myself, and other believers. I know it's discouraging to see people you've helped fall backwards again. Just keep praying for them and give the burden over to God. Trust that He will do what He promises in His timing, and that you can rest in His arms peacefully. Give all your anxieties over to God and let them go. Talk to God. Get to know Him. He is a Good God who loves you more than any other human being is capable of. He knew you before you were even born. Give him your fears, and your hurt, and take his promises to heart in return. It's o.k. to ask him for healing. If he calls you home, that's o.k. too. He promises you will be eternally happy there, never shedding a tear again. That's hard to imagine, I know, but dwell on this...who He is...where He comes from...and what it's like there. It's all in His word...for you to read and to know, and to love and look forward to. In the meantime, I am praying for your healing also.
