Social anxiety, deep depressions etc is difficult and not to be shrugged off as nothing but to humble thy soul understand how bad it actually can be for whatever reasons.
I know someone with posttraumatic stress who because of traumatising past experiences could hardly go to the shop or leave apartment.This person prayed and prayed and has deep relation wth God (but not society perhaps)
"he may not come when you need it but he will be right there on time, help is on the way" A Gospel song I used to listen to.
Can you socialise through internet?
Do you have friends?
I have friends but only spiritually and not in person.
I love and miss my friends, family and partner in holy union.
I have friends who have been there for me even when they were not there in person.
If I say their name or call on them they are there
Its our way of communicating now.
I do hope it will be in person or body also we communicate and socialise as I am also lonely in a way and isolated in a way
Please, do not say you are worthless.
That is a insult to God and yourself.
(and your future husband)
You have areas or gifts that are special for you that you have to give the world or those you meet, find those and use them.
I wish you friends in the plenty, soulfamily and a partner or future husband but I do not think you should be coming to your future husband saying "im worthless".If you truly beleive so ; do you want to give your future husband something worthless
Surely you dont truly see yourself as worthless, if you think about it ...
Value yourself and hold yourself higher to be and do your best for who you individualy are.
Dont judge yourself but encourage yourself to leave home, go out, meet new people and give praise for how good and brave you have been.
Write a todo list or goals that are small but achievable and prayer and turn to Jesus for he truly understands the pain you go through and ask for help.
I have also had problems with these things but it is better now.
I socialised mainly on the internet and met my best friend but when we met in person as our people we were we were not "flowing" so well as in our chatting which was not what I was hoping for but it had its reasons..
I cant explain my problems in socialising but it has its reasons...
So many years of my young life were "wasted" locked up in apartment.
I hope you will not experience this.
I can not birth child from this body or not make child from this body but do will to marry and live in holy union
Start by giving yourself encouragement and support and love, pepp yourself and go sit at a cafe (amoung people) and train yourself in a encouraging positive way till it feels easier and better.Make a good inner voice of "pepptalk"
If you have friends and family ask them for help with support, understanding , encourage you in your socialisation and help you relax and feel included in society and your social group.
Ignore those who "down you" or if anyone violates, abuses you etc.Make it clear its not ok for them treat you that way and you have rights aswell as they do.
Get all the help and support you can for yourself to heal and free you.
Remember Jesus does understand and know how you feel and care and love you (not all people are able understand or feel compassion, understanding but Jesus does)
Keep talking with jesus
Have you got good relations with a church or anyone you can turn to there?
Maybe cognitive therapy , making you do what you fear but in small steps and encouragement.
Say if you are feeling bad walking in shops cause you feel bad energies on you or whatever it be then a therapist may walk with you to the shops and make you walk into a shop and look at clothes and try to feel peace in it eventually and joy even :0
Then next time you may go to a bigger shopping centre and she will talk you through it (or he)
Ive also felt loneliness.
Jesus is good to turn to and ask for help.
You can write a actionplan yourself as this will empower you and make you more in control
Actionplan may be; write daily to do list, seek therapist, prayer and ask Jesus for help daily,use internet to socialise, challenge self to go out, take small steps but take steps,ask friends for support and help...
Best wishes for you anyway.