Ahh yes, I see it now, Super Cup of Ruin , wearing his red cape and blue underpants on the outside of his trousers, rushes to the aid of the poor defenseless girl, shouting, "don't worry, Im a Christian!", as he delivers a swift Krav Maga combo to the assailant rendering him helpless, and disarming him at the same time. After which she says, (two buck teeth with braces and blonde pigtails and all, I think she might be Celtic or even of Trojan-stock
), "thankyou thuper Cup of Ruin, you're my hero, I want to become a big strong Chrithtian like you".
Actually the cops say you need to do nothing, call emergency.., let them deal with it.