IT DOESNT GET BETTER;

  • Thread starter Thread starter lostgirl0218
  • Start date Start date
  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
L

lostgirl0218

Guest
i thought praying and staying close to God would heal me and make my situations better. it doesnt. evryday it hurts and it gets harder and harder.my ex boyfriend just woke up one day after two years of living with each other, and two engagements , he stopped loving me. i have court issues coming up. i lost all my friends. my mother doesnt love me . i feel hurt and lost and i have one thing to say to God..If you knew how dependant and how much i loved my ex and u wanted to remove him from my life, okay i get that.. but why would u leave me with the hurt and pain? i cant deal with it... i prayed and prayed my sisters send me bible verses evry morning and it doesnt help.. everyday it gets harder and harder.. i am hurt, heartbroken, and i know 21 years old is young but i feel my life will never get better; i need more prayer maybe
 
My precious sister, although the times you may be facing seem tough and unbearable God does heal all wounds, both physical and emotional. You asked why would God allow this to happen to me? If you have truly prayed heavily about the situation and stayed close with him, he will not let anything happen to you that he doesn't think is for the best. He only wants the best for you, and sometimes although you may love those people, they may not have been good people for you to be around. As for your mother, remember God said that he did not come to bring peace, but a sword. When you follow Christ there will be conflicts in your life, because much of the people we all love are a part of the world, and when they see the light of the Lord within you, they despise you because they want to live in the darkness. Do not be sad though, because through these times of suffering God will bring you out of it, and into something far better. Things may not seem clear right now, such as "Why would God want this pain for me?" remember that a woman must go through such horrible pain when going through birth, however through this great pain life comes forth. In this same sense, sometimes it is neccesary to go through the horrible pain the world inflicts upon you to truly understand the life that God has given you and to share that with the world.

Remember, no matter what happens, God is good, and he loves you dearly, more so than anyone else on this world, and he WILL be there for you.
 
Dear sister Lost girl0218! First welcome to the love network! I shall never judge you in any way!! I know few who are not going through some sort of a major trail,whether it be money or some other mountain that is in our way.And i know even fewer who have not made many mistakes in there own life!WE all have sis!!So never feel alone!

What you are beginning to learn good sister is that the devil looks to put as much pressure on our mind, as he does our body.He is a thief by nature you know.( john 10:10) Your prayers are not going unanswered,it is just you yourself are in no position to either hear them,or respond to them. Discipline by our Lord is not because he does not love us,the purpose of his discipline is to draw us closer to him.BUT!!!!

You knew there would be a but there didn't you? hehe When life is going good we have no care many times for Jesus,oh we say we believe!! We say he is in us,until something happens we did not foresee,nor expect! Such is the place you are in at present.At present, not in future!But your future is up to you in many ways! How can God let this happen to me?? I didn't do anything wrong to deserve what I have at present!!Do these words sound familiar?

The point being this,we never did anything for Jesus either! All we did was confess we know of him,but we really never sought or followed him either!Now in our mind the devil wants to kill us,he thinks he has us now!! You have been betrayed!!And yes you have!! But NOT!!! BY GOD!! Jesus was betrayed as well,does this mean we will not be?And look what happens to people who do betray our Lord.( Matt 26:24!)

I feel sorry for your boyfriend!! He has opened the door to the enemy!( eph 4:27) But our concern is you!!So what can we do to help both your mind and spirit? As it was for most of us dear sister, it is time for you to go back to school.( 1 John 2:27) Find a great Bible based church and understand what it truly means to follow our Jesus.I had to start over as well,so please do not feel bad! I, like you blew it! I put myself above the needs and desires of my Jesus,and like you, I paid for that decision.

But unlike you,I got mad, rather then having any feeling of abandonment.Jesus cannot not nor will ever leave you!! For any reason!!!( Deuteronomy 31:6,and hebrews 13:5-6) Notice God's Word a lot here sis?? Do you know why this is?Because i found out something which you are about to! Saying we believe is not the same as believing!!( james 1:22)Discipline is tough I know!!And it sure is not fun either!!

But please do look at something from this mess you find yourself in at the moment! There was a church which preformed as we used to!!The Church at Laodicea Please do read rev 3:15-22!!That my dear sister was us! To overcome, we cannot overcome by self,we must overcome through the promises that our loving Jesus has already given us through his Word!

But without such knowledge his own people can and will perish!!( Hosea 4:6)My people are what sis?? Yep destroyed by there own lack of knowledge, knowledge of God's Word!! So sis we have to get our sword out,( the Word)and start to first understand who we are as a child of God,so then we can not only help our self through our Jesus,but we can help others by our Jesus in us! The purpose for you to overcome,is so you can help another through Jesus in you, to do the very same!!

Words mean nothing without action to them!You know this!! So already you are learning something by another! Feeling have purpose sis,but not in faith,faith does not move by feeling,faith moves by the truth we speak in our lives! And when does that true truth usually speak?? When our flesh gives us every feeling, that God is not with us,or that God does not care for you!( rom 10:8-17)

Please do understand this, we speak what we believe from our heart! Words matter!!( matt 12:36) Your own words can create you own environment!!( rom 4:17-18) So when we speak,we always speak from God's own Word!!Not from our feeling of flesh! It is NOT mind over matter!! It is using God's Word over matter!!Jesus himself spoke to the devil by his own Word!!( matt 4:3-11) And notice something!! He had to speak more then once!

Even Jesus had to!!So we his children also have to.Since we are sure no better then Jesus,it is a very good idea to learn from him!I had to find this out the hard way,I pray you will not have to. Your feeling towards your boyfriend are not wrong!! But what good are they doing you yourself??You see the point to forgiving!( matt 18:21-35)Lesson 1, start having the will to forgive! It takes some time sure! But if you are willing to learn, then Jesus will sure teach you!!I know!!

And I sure!! am no better then you are!( acts 10:34) God loves us all the same! What is not the same,is our love for him!!And that is something dear sister we all must work on!( john 8:31-32) We become free when we use the Word he gave us as his very own children! So that this takes place for you personal sis!! ( john 15:11-17!!) We cannot give something to someone else we do not have,so we must first receive knowledge of it,then act on that truth by believing,and we believe when we speak His Word in bad times as well as good times!!

BE and always stay Thankful for the goodness of God!!( psalm 27:13) You are LOVED!! YOU MEAN SOMETHING!!! May the blessing of the Lord always find you sis,and always find you most well in him amen!!We Love you in Christ sister!! Give yourself a break and receive God's LOVE!!! For you!! So YOU can help another.That is a child of our LIVING God,we act like our Father in heaven! Because we believe in HIM!! amen!Your brother in Christ! mark
 
Sister I know perfectly how hard it is as I'm going through the same thing. It sure hurts. But you always end up finding things to do that keeps you from thinking about it and helps mending your heart. Pray a lot, talk to God a lot about your problem. Sometimes you realize things while talking to Him, that you didn't realize before, letting it out helps alot I swear!
Good luck hun and I'm here in case you need to talk xx
 
babygirl hold on im 46 and still trying u r the love of jesus life you r so so loved im praying for you get u eyes on him offthis world its not r home
 
God knows your heart and your needs.
If you have wronged anyone...
try to make it right.
Appollogize and let God work in your heart.
Ask God for wisdom on your court dates.
I will pray for you too
Love in Jesus, Shekaniah


James 1:5
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
 
I'm so sorry you're hurting :( .

But blaming God is not going to help...it will only make things worse. Have you repented and accepted Christ as your Savior? After you do that, the Holy Spirit will live in you and guide you and teach you. An incredible experience!!!

Matthew 6:33 "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Right now you're seeking your boyfriend first and then God.

Satan is always trying to get us to believe that everything is God's fault but we have to fight this kind of thinking. Instead, pursue the things that God wants you to pursue....honesty, integrity, right-thinking, kindness, etc. and study God's Word so you can have a true relationship with Him.

Praying for strength and guidance for you :)
 
It may keep getting harder before it starts getting better, but do not lose hope, sister. Through trials and struggles, we grow stronger and know ourselves better. We come out the other end a whole new person...older and wiser. Where you now see struggles, I pray you soon see opportunities. God be with you.
 
Brother rainacorn makes a most excellent point!!!! We grow stronger AND!!!! KNOW OURSELVES BETTER!!! We begin to see ourselves as God himself sees us through HIS EYES of Faith for us!!( Hebrews 11:6). Faith is based on believing!! And believing is based on both our words and actions from what we believe!Which changes our fact into truth!

We do not need to be judged by another,our own words and actions judge us.We renew our minds through God's Word,( rom 12:1-2)so we can judge our hearts, to line up with the knowledge of God's Word,so we can through Jesus in us,walk that out for others to both see, and bear witness to.We judge ourselves by what we ourselfs choose to believe, or choose not to believe,from this we bear fruit,or do not bear fruit.Blessing.
 
Hugs lostgirl :)
Im sorry you are hurting so much.
You are in my prayers in Jesus for all care and help.
Understand, that loving Jesus is not always about things getting better in one's life, but that in Jesus, we are stronger and know Jesus's perfect love will get us through this life.
Jesus is always with you, sometimes we need to look away from the problems, so we can see Jesus!

Hugs and God bless
pickles
 
"For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

Forgive any inaccuracies that may be present in what I am about to say, for I do not know the entire situation and this can land very close to home or very far away. So I ask for your forgiveness in advance.

If my knee hurts, the best way to let the pain subside is to watch the television. However, to pay attention to the tv is a choice. I could turn on the television and keep thinking about my knee and then the television wouldn't work to help the pain. The same is true for the pain within you. Whether your focus is on your ex or on God will determine the following emotions.

Have you ever been in a good mood, then turned on a movie and then because of the movie felt another emotion? it is because it took your brain on a journey and the emotion followed. It isn't the other way around, the thought doesn't follow the emotion the emotion follows the thought.

IF, when you pray for God to cleanse your pain. You don't focus on God being within you, cradling and loving you. IF instead after you pray you keep your mind focused on your ex of course the pain will continue, again the thought sparks the emotion.

The closure and understanding of what happened and why is another stage, it is best addressed after you have had a "vacation" from your emotional storm. Work on you, and then you can come back to figure out what happened and why.

If you know God. Which I definitely believe you do, then you have a relationship with Him. You remember how He loves you. Do you remember how it felt? That warmth that tingles from your chest over your shoulders and nearly makes you shiver? allow yourself to smile and focus on that. Breath in and love God back. Thank Him for everything He has given you and trust Him that you will be okay and that everything happens for a reason. Your life has an amazing amount in store for you, but before you could move on to better things the old life had to be removed. God bless you sister. If I can help in any way I'll be around. You are in great company. I love the family we have here and I am excited for you. The Lord works in mysterious ways.

again God bless :)
 
Last edited:
lostgirl0218 said:
i thought praying and staying close to God would heal me and make my situations better. it doesnt. evryday it hurts and it gets harder and harder.my ex boyfriend just woke up one day after two years of living with each other, and two engagements , he stopped loving me. i have court issues coming up. i lost all my friends. my mother doesnt love me . i feel hurt and lost and i have one thing to say to God..If you knew how dependant and how much i loved my ex and u wanted to remove him from my life, okay i get that.. but why would u leave me with the hurt and pain? i cant deal with it... i prayed and prayed my sisters send me bible verses evry morning and it doesnt help.. everyday it gets harder and harder.. i am hurt, heartbroken, and i know 21 years old is young but i feel my life will never get better; i need more prayer maybe
Click to expand...

Little one, I weep with you. :(
Prayer is good, staying close to God is good, but more than anything you need to know Jesus as your Savior. I see in your profile you are not sure if you belong to Him, and this will make all the difference in your life here and in the one to come. We do not know if perhaps the Lord brought you through all this to make you aware of your great need of Him, and this is kindness, dear child!
Please speak to someone you know is redeemed about this, my love. I pray you will do this with all speed, for only your sake. In Christ we have joy, which surpasses mere happiness. And if you do belong to Him already, I encourage you to take hold of the things that are yours because of the great sacrifice the Lord made, just for you, because He loves you so!
People will always disappoint, baby girl. Even those who love you most will do so. This is why we cannot look to one another, dear one. The only One whom you can count on is the Lord. But the good news is you can count on the Lord!! :)
He will never lie to you, never leave you, never abandon you, never stop loving you. Take your eyes off other people, take them off yourself, and put them on Jesus. When our focus is right, all else becomes clear. I do not mean to say there will never be pain to endure, for we are called to complete the sufferings of Christ. And little by little He conforms us to His image, and often that process hurts! He is the Good Shepherd. Sometimes (in this world, little one) a good shepherd has to break the leg of a lamb who wanders off. He does this to protect that lamb, so it won't find danger or death far away from its loving caretaker. And while the leg heals, the shepherd carries that little lamb and keeps it always close to him. The lamb feels the loving touch of the shepherd, and grows close to him, and learns about how the shepherd loves it, and begins to trust him and want to be with him.
I have had my legs broken by my Good Shepherd many times. It is quite painful! But the results were just as He intended. I can now rejoice over these times, even though I couldn't while it was happening. S-l-o-w-l-y I am learning to rejoice when He breaks me, because I am learning to trust Him, and that, dear child, is a wonderful feeling! There's an old hymn that says it's so sweet to trust in Jesus, and I find this is true. I pray you will find this Truth as well, beloved.

I pray the Lord will draw you to himself. I ask that you will find the rest you so need, and peace. I pray for healing for your precious heart, and for your bf. I ask our mighty God to aid you in your legal issues, and to send you new friends who share the mind of Christ. I trust the Lord to heal your relationship with your mom, and to send you other mommas who will love you. I pray our Abba will keep you close with us, and that you will find fellowship here, as well as in a local assembly of brothers and sisters in Jesus. I believe God for good for you, my little one. I pray you will believe this, too.

With much love from a mother's heart,
ellie

 
I went through the same thing; in fact, I've been going through it for ten years. Instead of allowing God to fill the emptiness left by an ended relationship, I wept and obsessed and eventually went back to my boyfriend. Turns out God wanted us apart for a reason... but I didn't let him heal me, and now I get hurt on a daily basis. It will feel truly awful for a while, and you will go through the stages of grief, but look upward, not inward. The more time you spend thinking of God and others who need your thoughts and help, the less time you'll have to think of your ex and your relationship.
 
Why would you live with your boyfriend without being married to him and then expect things to go well for you? Even if you don't do that anymore, things won't change overnight. There are consequences to everything we do in life, good or bad. God bless!
 
Dear Lord, I pray that your love and forgiveness will find lostgirl the way your love and forgiveness found me. I pray and uphold lostgirl into your presence dear lord, that you give her the wisdom to realize that this would be a wonderful opportunity to have a fresh start with you. Let her know that only your love and mercy is constant permanent all others loves last but just for a few day, months, and even years. Let her realize her worth in you and that she is precious in your eyes. Dear Lord let her find strength and comfort in you and your word. In Jesus I pray Amen
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back