Jessa Duggar Will Have a Chaste Courtship — and My Kids Will, Too (Yahoo News)

[mamasan]

djness wrote " makes me think someone is a fan of Danielle Steel type novels. " I don't know what "Danielle Steel type novels are.
But I do think a man would be honored to know that his bride "saved everything" just for him. Most of the comments on this thread seem (in my mind) to be putting her down because she has stayed "pure" instead of being glad at the fact that she has stayed "unsullied" Yes, Jesus does save and forgive sins. But sex outside of marriage has its consequences.
As to the mother having 20 children, apparently God did not think that was too many. By the way, I have never seen these people on TV.

 

[Nautilus]

Always finding a way to continue your war against God.


1 Peter 3:3-4
[SUP]3 [/SUP]Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. [SUP]4 [/SUP]Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Gonna honestly have to go with a whatever on this on. You want to marry a troll be my guest. If I'm a sinner for wanting to be physically attracted to the person I'm with, well thats a cross I'll proudly bear.

 

[Jullianna]

Try this instead:

1 Peter 3:3-4
[SUP]3 [/SUP]Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. [SUP]4 [/SUP]Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Great post, jimmy. Unfortunately, even a lot of Christians do not see things this way. They say looks don't mean anything, but their behavior betrays them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I like what you said too, monicat. Being valued as "the hot one" is a backhanded compliment, especially since that's all most people ever take time to see where attractive people are concerned. Those who are deemed by others to be less attractive in some way long to be seen for richer qualities. "Hot ones" desire no less, but few care about that. It's somehow okay to offend "hot" people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As far as how many children a couple has or doesn't have, shouldn't that be between God and the couple?

Genesis 1: 27God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, ..."

Some folks are apparently better at multiplication than others of us.

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As far as the young couple's relationship, purity in any form should always be encouraged. The world is an ugly place. If they don't want to be part of that and/or take the risk of hurting themselves or one another, good for them! I sometimes wonder whether jealousy might be at the root of criticism against relationships like this. Even if you don't understand or choose another way for yourself, seems like you could respect their right to choose this route for themselves and appreciate their respect for their parents. Maybe some folks see this as parents overprotecting their kids, but I'm not sure that's possible in this present life.

 

[DarlinNadia]

I drove MYSELF around the block in my past ... multiple times. If it weren't for my past, I would have my future

What is in the past ... Confessed and Repented.. has been forgiven by Jesus.. Has it not?

***Wouldn't typo ... Wouldn't have my future.

 

[SonInMe]

Its because of my past that my kids are, I believe, still virgins.

My daughter is 25.

My son is 27.

It does happen, even with attractive people

 

[starfield]

Gonna honestly have to go with a whatever on this on. You want to marry a troll be my guest. If I'm a sinner for wanting to be physically attracted to the person I'm with, well thats a cross I'll proudly bear.

It is statements like the above that are disrespectful to women. To refer to women who do not focus on outward adornment but rather inner beauty and character as 'troll' suggest that Nautilus is very shallow and has a questionable integrity.

 

[Nautilus]

It is statements like the above that are disrespectful to women. To refer to women who do not focus on outward adornment but rather inner beauty and character as 'troll' suggest that Nautilus is very shallow and has a questionable integrity.

or that I dont try to falsely make myself appear holier than thou with lame excuses of how 'looks dont matter to me'

And if I'm going to be criticized as shallow and of questionable integrity because I do care about looks then please, I welcome it. If certain people are offended by that, its not my problem. I personally believe anyone who says looks are unimportant is lying.

 

[just_monicat]

If she is the hot one I'd hate to see the rest of them...not impressed

Gonna honestly have to go with a whatever on this on. You want to marry a troll be my guest. If I'm a sinner for wanting to be physically attracted to the person I'm with, well thats a cross I'll proudly bear.

i don't fault you for wanting to (only) marry someone that you have physical attraction toward. in fact, i share your opinion on that expectation.

but let's be clear. i don't think you're in a need-based position to evaluate whether jessa duggar (or any of her kin) are attractive enough for you to marry. so, why would anyone feel the need to comment on whether she is attractive or not?

your criticism of her not being attractive (in your eyes) has absolutely nothing to do with whether you should desire to marry an attractive woman.

by the way, i only raised the issue of attraction because i thought it was disappointing that an article and another poster felt the need to comment on, and distinguish her by her outward beauty (while insulting everyone else in contrast). i think that's unfortunate - as women, we should be valued for more than being "hot" or provide the basis for needless comparison. i genuinely don't think many even realize what a hurtful thing that can be. : )

 

[just_monicat]

i don't fault you for wanting to (only) marry someone that you have physical attraction toward. in fact, i share your opinion on that expectation.

but let's be clear. i don't think you're in a need-based position to evaluate whether jessa duggar (or any of her kin) are attractive enough for you to marry. so, why would anyone feel the need to comment on whether she is attractive or not?

your criticism of her not being attractive (in your eyes) has absolutely nothing to do with whether you should desire to marry an attractive woman.

by the way, i only raised the issue of attraction because i thought it was disappointing that an article and another poster felt the need to comment on, and distinguish her by her outward beauty (while insulting everyone else in her family by contrast). i think that's unfortunate - as women, we should be valued for more than being "hot" or provide the basis for needless comparison. i genuinely don't think many even realize what a hurtful thing that can be.

sorry about the mistake - please see the above corrected version

 

[SonInMe]

By the way, you can be very attracted to someone and...

not have sex with them before marriage.

 

[TheAristocat]

Try this instead:

1 Peter 3:3-4
[SUP]3 [/SUP]Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. [SUP]4 [/SUP]Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Why can't a person try both? There have been some mistaken assumptions about what I've attempted to say. A person can be ugly on the inside as well as the out, and a person can be beautiful on the outside as well as the in. The two don't have a lot to do with each other. Outward beauty is a double edged sword. It gives you attention and praise, but it can be the wrong kind, too. And beautiful people need to be exceptionally discerning as to who really loves them.

There is nothing wrong with the beauty of the stars, a flower, or any other part of God's Creation. And I'm sure we agree there is nothing wrong with the beauty of a woman. Let's just hope that she is as beautiful on the inside as she is on the out.

 

[TheAristocat]

Also this raises the question of whether or not Paul was against dressing to suit the occasion or if he was against outward beauty in all circumstances. And if not then what does it mean for our beauty to come from our inner selves? Does that abrogate the concept of having outward beauty as well? Did he mean to say that our outward beauty should add nothing to our inward beauty? Did he mean to say that we should deface our bodies if we are born with natural beauty? In terms of my own understanding of this passage I need to do more research.

 

[TheAristocat]

(while insulting everyone else in contrast).

If a person decides to take a complement toward one person as an insult toward them that says something about that person. It doesn't mean they're ugly, but perhaps insecure. There have been others - both male and female - here who were perfectly fine with what has been said as far as I can see.

as women, we should be valued for more than being "hot"

And you absolutely are. In the case of my first post (if that is what you are addressing) I was answering someone's joke about the exorbitant number of children the family had with another joke. Essentially, one's worth does not depend on how rare they are or how few of them they are but on what they have to add to God's Creation. Some people will look at a situation as the glass is half full and some will look at it as the glass being half empty. If it ends up being a bowl and not a glass at all that would make me worry for them. But in the end how someone sees a particular situation is up to them. And how someone takes an insult or a complement should say nothing about the intentions of the giver.

 

[TheAristocat]

And to address what has been said more directly - in a post that was meant as a joke, I wasn't intending to address the many facets of her theology or personality, what her character is like, what the value of her hobbies are, how many children she will be able to conceive, etc. In short, my post was a joke. Jokes are light-hearted. And therefore the depth of it was rather shallow. That being whatever I noticed at first glance. But it also had something more to add that I hope everyone here is willing to receive.

In the future I can assign value to her based upon another characteristic of who she is or seems to be as a human being: her choice of wool instead of fur, the collagen levels in her skin, the fact that we can both raise our left eyebrows independently of our right or that she appears to be the love child of Jack Nicholson and Angelina Jolie.

 

[just_monicat]

If a person decides to take a complement toward one person as an insult toward them that says something about that person. It doesn't mean they're ugly, but perhaps insecure. There have been others - both male and female - here who were perfectly fine with what has been said as far as I can see.
.

perhaps you missed it, but you quoted the one part of my reply that i responded with a correction immediately following the edit window timeout.

what i meant to say (and corrected myself in the following post) was:

(while insulting everyone else in her family by contrast).

in no way was i inferring the article (or you) were comparing her to anyone other than her own family.

as to your specific comments, i understand they might have been made as a joke, and i understand that.

unfortunately, jokes don't always translate well in this kind of medium. and i must confess i don't really see a lot of humor in validating or measuring a woman on the basis of her physical beauty.

perhaps we as christians have ample reasoning and motivation to acknowledge a woman on a basis greater than her physical appearance.

if you have no problem with those kind of statements, that's your call. but i felt it was worthwhile to share for the benefit of those who've made similar statements how it might feel to be on the receiving end of such distinctions or "flattery".

And to address what has been said more directly - in a post that was meant as a joke, I wasn't intending to address the many facets of her theology or personality, what her character is like, what the value of her hobbies are, how many children she will be able to conceive, etc. In short, my post was a joke.

that's the whole point. evaluating or approving of a woman on the basis of her appearance is doing just that - failing to acknowledge any or all of those points or qualities you listed (or any others, for that matter) while diminishing her as a person.