Let the pun wars begin

[Magenta]

The broccoli was green with envy.

Better than being fruity!

*runs for cover*

 

[Jase]

What do you call a goose on crutches? 🤔

Prop-a-gander. 😀

 

[Lynx]

I thought that was what you called a meticulous goose. A proper gander.

 

[Jase]

I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes...

I now have heinzsight! 😀

 

[Jase]

How much does a roof cost?

Nothing - it's "on the house!" 🤗

 

[Godsgirl83]

How much does a roof cost?

Nothing 🤗

if only that were true *sigh*

 

[Jase]

What's the difference between a well-dressed bicyclist and a poorly dressed unicyclist?

Attire!

 

[Jase]

I was wondering 🤔 why music was coming from my printer?......

Apparently, the paperwas jamming! 🤗

 

[Mem]

If you were to venture in the practice of trolling trolls, would it be considered controlling?

 

[Lynx]

I was wondering 🤔 why music was coming from my printer?......

Apparently, the paperwas jamming! 🤗

A few nights ago I was walking home, going past the graveyard, and I heard music playing backward.

I investigated and found Beethoven was decomposing.

 

[Jase]

Did you hear the joke about the jump rope?

WelL then, just skip it!

 

[Jase]

When the draw bridge operator was asked about his job...

He said...."It has it's ups and downs." 😉

 

[Jase]

My friend Jack claims he can communicate with vegetables.

Jack and the beans talk! 😀

 

[Jase]

Big shout out to my fingers 🖐️

I can always count on them! 👌👍

 

[Jase]

An invisible man marries an invisible woman.

The kids were nothing to look at either! 🤗

 

[Jase]

What's the difference between bird-flu and swine-flu?

One requires tweetment and the other requires oinkment. 🤗

 

[Jase]

I got over my obsession with chocolate, marshmallows and nuts...

I won't lie to you....it was a rocky road! 🤗

 

[Godsgirl83]

I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda.


Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.

 

[Jase]

Know why cows 🐮have hooves instead of feet?

Because they Latose. 🤗

 

[Jase]

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Because he had a hole in one! 🤗