LOST MY TEMPER, HOPE GOD FORGIVE ME

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lostgirl0218

Guest
#1
#1
Earlier this week i contacted my ex and told him something personal that i am pregnant. he was very non chalant and didnt seem to care. after he said he would call me and didnt it was late at night and i dont know if it was The Enemy playing with my mind, but i relasped and i called him. make a long story short, he could care less about me or the child and he told me i ruined his life and that he doesnt care about the decision i make whether i keep the baby or get an abortion.he then told me not to contact him for another nine months and hung up in my face. this is the same guy i was engaged too and lived with. i was furious and i lost it. i texted him a VERY mean, ugly, and hateful text and bought up personal issues, about his past abuse. after i sent it i felt awful, and i asked God to forgive me and i kid you not i just knew Satan was laughing at me. i am not a mean hearted person and my ex is the only person that can bring me down to that level. regardless i should know better.a couple of days later i sent him a message via facebook and apologized but told him im not bitter and i dnt want to get back with him, i just lost it for a second, bc it hurt when he kept saying i ruined his life. i also told him that a baby is involved now but i am considering abortion. he hasnt responded back, but i dont expect him too. only concern i have is if God can forgive me for the mean stuff i said... i know some people may say Why is this girl still stuck on him, hes a jerk.. but my ex was very abusive, mentally, and physically. its like he has this mind control over me. even though he could have killed me many times i never left bc i felt like i could save him, and no one else understands him. and it just hurts bc i stayed with him through the abuse, his family abandoning him, job loses, evictions,,no car, cooking cleaning,laundry,making myself look good for him every day, giving my body to him on demand all while working and in school for two years.. for him to just wake up and not love me one day hurts.. now i have a kid in me and he really has disappeared. he has a new girlfriend now so i guess she provided for him more than i could..
 
S

Strong1

Guest
#2
#2
My girl,
You have much more to be concerned about than this "guy."
Your focus is so far off, anyone who reads this can see it.
Whether or not god will forgive you for losing your temper? :eek:

Wow. You were living with your bf, are now pregnant, and you want to know if God will forgive you for losing your temper? Have you found forgiveness from God for the rest of your stuff?

It doesnt sound like you have been living a consecrated life before God anyways, so I think your temper right now is the least of your worries......If this guy wants to close the door on you and this child, at this time.... then back away from him, and RUN into the arms of the one who will love you no matter what you have done. the one who loves you most.
You are extremely volnurable at this time, and all you need to be thinking about is you and that child that God has so ALLOWED to be conceived within you. He knew this would be and He knows the perfected end. Do not even consider abortion. You have no idea of the purpose of this child in this world at this present time. You have no idea of the doors that will be opened for you or others through the coming of this child. God gives life, and God takes life. You do not make that decision. You have already made some careless choices, now don't make another. Work on CORRECTING the first. Find forgiveness in Jesus, and know that, you are beautiful in His sight, and no one or thing can change that. Men do not make woman feel accepted, you are acceptable through CHRIST.

This will be a challenging time for you. I know. I've been there. God has a way of making something wonderful come out of something ugly. He is the way. Seek Him through your struggle.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#3
#3
lostgirl, woman to woman, please remember that pregnancy has a way of making women extremely emotional and this has compounded things greatly (an understatement). Sounds like you and God have a LOT of talking to do about a great many things, doesn't it?

This whole situation seems to have opened your eyes about this man. Yes, he has issues, but that doesn't excuse his abuse of you or the abandonment of his child, does it? Please protect both yourself and your child from him, okay?


Do you have family you could talk with? Do your parents know? Do you have a church family? Women christian friends to talk with? You're right you know.....a baby is involved now. Your baby. No matter what his father has done. We can pray with you too. Please let us know how you are doing.

The past is...past. Take the past to God and led Him lead you forward.


I pray that everyone responding to your post will consider your present emotional state when posting comments.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#4
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#4
lostgirl0218 said:
Earlier this week i contacted my ex and told him something personal that i am pregnant. he was very non chalant and didnt seem to care. after he said he would call me and didnt it was late at night and i dont know if it was The Enemy playing with my mind, but i relasped and i called him. make a long story short, he could care less about me or the child and he told me i ruined his life and that he doesnt care about the decision i make whether i keep the baby or get an abortion.he then told me not to contact him for another nine months and hung up in my face. this is the same guy i was engaged too and lived with. i was furious and i lost it. i texted him a VERY mean, ugly, and hateful text and bought up personal issues, about his past abuse. after i sent it i felt awful, and i asked God to forgive me and i kid you not i just knew Satan was laughing at me. i am not a mean hearted person and my ex is the only person that can bring me down to that level. regardless i should know better.a couple of days later i sent him a message via facebook and apologized but told him im not bitter and i dnt want to get back with him, i just lost it for a second, bc it hurt when he kept saying i ruined his life. i also told him that a baby is involved now but i am considering abortion. he hasnt responded back, but i dont expect him too. only concern i have is if God can forgive me for the mean stuff i said... i know some people may say Why is this girl still stuck on him, hes a jerk.. but my ex was very abusive, mentally, and physically. its like he has this mind control over me. even though he could have killed me many times i never left bc i felt like i could save him, and no one else understands him. and it just hurts bc i stayed with him through the abuse, his family abandoning him, job loses, evictions,,no car, cooking cleaning,laundry,making myself look good for him every day, giving my body to him on demand all while working and in school for two years.. for him to just wake up and not love me one day hurts.. now i have a kid in me and he really has disappeared. he has a new girlfriend now so i guess she provided for him more than i could..
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First of all Lostgirl, of course God forgives you. God is not mad at you. He loves you and wants to take care of all of your worries. God specializes in mending broken hearts and lifting us up out of the holes we find ourselves in. He knows all the mistakes we make and none of them can make Him stop loving us.

I think you had every right in the world to be angry. Here was the man that you had trusted and loved for so long rejecting you completely in your time of greatest need. You would have to be a saint to not lose your temper. My heart goes out to you. I know that some men can be very manipulative and controlling to the point where they make a woman feel downright trapped, like they have no other choice but to put up with the poisonous relationship that they are in. It happens to many women.

The important thing is that you find a way to move on with your life and focus on your NEW life with the precious gift that God has blessed you with. I know it probably seems impossible right now but God ALWAYS provides for the needs of the faithful and I promise you that if you remain faithful He will meet ALL of your needs and your child's needs too.

God bless you, sister. I will pray for you. - Gabriel

"And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." - Phillipians 4:19 NASB

"I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." - John 14:18 AKJV

"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." - Deuteronomy 31:8 NIV
 
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Brandon777

Guest
#5
#5
Pslam 103:12 "As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." May the Lord be with you.
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#6
May 4, 2009
1,534
6
0
#6
lostgirl0218 said:
Earlier this week i contacted my ex and told him something personal that i am pregnant. he was very non chalant and didnt seem to care. after he said he would call me and didnt it was late at night and i dont know if it was The Enemy playing with my mind, but i relasped and i called him. make a long story short, he could care less about me or the child and he told me i ruined his life and that he doesnt care about the decision i make whether i keep the baby or get an abortion.he then told me not to contact him for another nine months and hung up in my face. this is the same guy i was engaged too and lived with. i was furious and i lost it. i texted him a VERY mean, ugly, and hateful text and bought up personal issues, about his past abuse. after i sent it i felt awful, and i asked God to forgive me and i kid you not i just knew Satan was laughing at me. i am not a mean hearted person and my ex is the only person that can bring me down to that level. regardless i should know better.a couple of days later i sent him a message via facebook and apologized but told him im not bitter and i dnt want to get back with him, i just lost it for a second, bc it hurt when he kept saying i ruined his life. i also told him that a baby is involved now but i am considering abortion. he hasnt responded back, but i dont expect him too. only concern i have is if God can forgive me for the mean stuff i said... i know some people may say Why is this girl still stuck on him, hes a jerk.. but my ex was very abusive, mentally, and physically. its like he has this mind control over me. even though he could have killed me many times i never left bc i felt like i could save him, and no one else understands him. and it just hurts bc i stayed with him through the abuse, his family abandoning him, job loses, evictions,,no car, cooking cleaning,laundry,making myself look good for him every day, giving my body to him on demand all while working and in school for two years.. for him to just wake up and not love me one day hurts.. now i have a kid in me and he really has disappeared. he has a new girlfriend now so i guess she provided for him more than i could..
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Just thought you'd like to know that there is no codemnation in Christ. Romans 8:1
 
I

imperfection

Guest
#7
#7
Lostgirl, you are in my prayers.

I really feel sorry for you having to go through all of this. You are approximatively the same age as me and I can imagine how all of this must feel for you.

We have a loving God, a very loving and patient God. He loves you, no matter what. You made some sily choices and I'm not sure if you are aware of it, but those are the consequences of the choices you made. Now, still, God is a specialist in turning awful situations into joy and happiness.

You, my dear, are a princess. A princess of God and God wants you to be treated like one and any man that doesn't treat you like an absolute princess isn't worth one tear of yours.

Yes, it's true, God calls us to love one another but you are far more concerned about this guy and his opinion and if he is upset with you or not, than you are about your child. Don't waste time....run to God and be loved and cherished.

You are in my prayers, honey. God loves you.
 
Searching4Truth

Searching4Truth

Senior Member
#8
Jul 25, 2012
1,904
24
0
#8
Why do the jerks always get the beautifully soul'd girls too? It's just not fair. Well, I'm sure God will look out for you. He is always good.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#9
#9
Before there are any more posts about 'what about all your other sins', know that Lostgirl is a brand new Christian. She was in this relationship before accepting God into her life. Please keep in mind shes only weeks old in the faith and deal with her as such. I have had a few one on one interactions with her and she is a sweet girl that just needs our encouragement and help with her new faith.
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#10
May 4, 2009
1,534
6
0
#10
Ugly said:
Before there are any more posts about 'what about all your other sins', know that Lostgirl is a brand new Christian. She was in this relationship before accepting God into her life. Please keep in mind shes only weeks old in the faith and deal with her as such. I have had a few one on one interactions with her and she is a sweet girl that just needs our encouragement and help with her new faith.
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And even if she wasn't a new Christian. We should still be loving her and not comdemning her.
 
TheAristocat

TheAristocat

Senior Member
#11
Oct 4, 2011
2,150
26
0
#11
lostgirl0218 said:
Earlier this week i contacted my ex and told him something personal that i am pregnant. he was very non chalant and didnt seem to care. after he said he would call me and didnt it was late at night and i dont know if it was The Enemy playing with my mind, but i relasped and i called him. make a long story short, he could care less about me or the child and he told me i ruined his life and that he doesnt care about the decision i make whether i keep the baby or get an abortion.he then told me not to contact him for another nine months and hung up in my face. this is the same guy i was engaged too and lived with. i was furious and i lost it. i texted him a VERY mean, ugly, and hateful text and bought up personal issues, about his past abuse. after i sent it i felt awful, and i asked God to forgive me and i kid you not i just knew Satan was laughing at me. i am not a mean hearted person and my ex is the only person that can bring me down to that level. regardless i should know better.a couple of days later i sent him a message via facebook and apologized but told him im not bitter and i dnt want to get back with him, i just lost it for a second, bc it hurt when he kept saying i ruined his life. i also told him that a baby is involved now but i am considering abortion. he hasnt responded back, but i dont expect him too. only concern i have is if God can forgive me for the mean stuff i said... i know some people may say Why is this girl still stuck on him, hes a jerk.. but my ex was very abusive, mentally, and physically. its like he has this mind control over me. even though he could have killed me many times i never left bc i felt like i could save him, and no one else understands him. and it just hurts bc i stayed with him through the abuse, his family abandoning him, job loses, evictions,,no car, cooking cleaning,laundry,making myself look good for him every day, giving my body to him on demand all while working and in school for two years.. for him to just wake up and not love me one day hurts.. now i have a kid in me and he really has disappeared. he has a new girlfriend now so i guess she provided for him more than i could..
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Incorrect. Satan is trying to get you back, because he knows he lost you. Not having sexual relations before marriage is the right thing to do. That is what you are doing now. Don't kill your child. When you are overcome with emotions just go to God. He cares about you. And he sees how this man is treating his own offspring as well as God's daughter. You need to heap your cares upon God. Do your best to obey God, and let God handle the rest.

Right now you are just feeling the effects of your previous sins. It will get better, but there's hell to pay. And it will hurt for a while. Trust me. Don't kill your child. The very woman who won her case for legalizing abortion is now pro-life.

God bless you in your new life. You have a great adventure ahead of you.
 
L

Lucy68

Senior Member
#12
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
22
0
#12
Welcome to the Faith, Lost girl ....or should we say found girl ? :)

Being pregnant will make you very emotional. Plus, you're going through a traumatic time with someone you thought loved you. Of course God will forgive you for ranting at your ex-bf. I do hope he is an 'ex'.

God has a really nice man out there for you ....seek God's face first and everything else will be thrown in as a bonus ;)

Praying for strength, guidance, and calmness for you little sister....hang in there. You are GREATLY loved :)
 
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