Love sick..and disgusted. :/

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JesusMyOnly

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2014
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Respectful rant in 5,4,3,2...


Jesus is great! Life with Him is a blessing, amen. This is not a first world problem and I am not trying to make it seem like my life is so horrible because of my future rant but I'd just like to address it.


First things first, I understand that not everyone who comes into this chat room is even Christian and that they have no intentions on converting and going to Jesus as their personal savior and they just care to troll..I however am addressing those who identify themselves as a Christian, walking with the Lord. I've made mistakes, I've screwed up and have had my horrible moments in a negative light so in no way am I trying to make it seem like I am a perfect princess that has never done wrong. I am just writing out to ask for a little respect. Please.


I was never the girl who got all the guys, I was naturally quiet, shy and secluded away from most people. I never had the 10 out of 10 point body and my hair never fell the right way, I wasn't "date able" material which devastated me (ridiculous girl problems). However over the enternet this is an entire different story. Never in my life have I been constantly harrassed, flirted with and hit on then on this very website. I know, I know its as easy as blocking someone or hitting the ignore button. I understand that I welcome PM to everyone in the chat and I seem welcoming. The thing that hurts me the most and what irritates me is that guys believe they can do such a thing in the first place. Not all guys here do this (thank GOD) and I know some girls must do this to guys but I am a girl so it would be a habit to write from my perspective.


The focus on people relationships and romance/sex has become almost more important than a relationship with God these days. Through this site I hate to say but it only brings proof of this. Countless amount of times have I had conversations about someone who has broken up with a loved one, some guy who is trying to tell me about his sexual struggles and talking about relationships just in general asking me about my love life and if I've struggled with lust, asking to see my picture and wanting me to call them (so on so forth). These things are common, everyday human struggles/interests. This I understand but the way they desplay it in certain manners is inappropriate.[h=3][/h] to talk to a lady (of any age) about.


I am NOT mad and I'm NOT being mean but please have some respect for yourselves and others (directed towards the men who do this or even woman who do this to men). You can not just come into this site (or any other site), pick out a girl (or guy) and then try to get together with her (or him). You have to get to know someone over time and pray about them and for them to God. You have to be careful concerning who you are talking to. Don't give out personal info to a guy or girl you just met hoping you can get with them romantically. I say this as a warning and out of love.


When you put others before God (in any type of relationships, friendship or romance) you are setting yourself up for disappointment, hurt, heartache and failure. This isn't just a saying but the truth. I had a very good friend of mine tell me finding a future spouse shouldn't be finding a replacement for God and His love, but someone who is a representation of God and His love.


I've been told and believe that love should be like a triangle. Both you and your lover are at the bottom corners (each in your own vertex) the higher you go up to God the closer you and your lover get together. Love must be built on a godly foundation for the right, pure and genuine reason. Lust is overrated and true love is so relieving, gentle and safe. Love is an essential quality of God, and He shows us in the Bible how real, true love works. Redefining love or trying to find it outside of God’s design is asking for frustration and disillusionment. Surrendering our desires to God, submitting to His will, and finding our fulfillment in Him are the keys to finding true love. “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4).


Rely on God and wait. HIS LOVE (Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.)
Isaiah 54:10 Jeremiah 31:3-4 Matthew:10:30-31
John 3:16,15:9,15:13 1 John 4:9 ~ First ground your self on the rock that is Christ Jesus and the truest love you could ever be given.


I am always here if someone needs a friend, prayer/bible study partner, advice giver or just if you need someone to talk to. Just don't treat me (or anyone else) like a toy.
 
I've come to understand that some Middle Eastern countries (there may be others as well i'm not sure) have a common practice of approaching women and moving straight into dating or marriage topics. This is the norm for their society and they are only acting on what they know. So men like that, from those cultures, perhaps be a Little more patient with.
But a man from a culture more like ours, or a man being plainly sexual, they're dogs. And especially the men being sexual should be reported so they can be banned. Many women refuse to report these men though. So they are allowed to infest the site and continue harassing women. And every time a woman chooses not to report the behavior they hold a bit of responsibility for every other woman he sexually harasses after you.

But rest assured, your blog will fall on deaf ears. I've heard people make these complaints before. The issue is the men that do such things don't care. I've known women to put all sorts of messages in their PM box to discourage men, and it might cut back on the amount, but nothing stops them. Even married women posting messages they are happily married and do not want any messages from men still get hit on. Dogs.

The bigger issue for men, and i've experienced this myself, is that some of the women from certain countries come here looking to find a man to help them get to America. I've had a number of women from a specific country message me and be really nice and act all Christian and within a few minutes the questions start. One of the first is what kind of work i do. Once they figure out i don't make a lot of money, all of a sudden they lose interest. The stop talking and i never hear from them again. This takes place within 10-20 minutes. I've had to refuse talking to these women, unless i've seen them on the site long enough to know they are more respectable and not likely to behave in such a manner.
But i've also had women talk to me who were so obviously looking for a man (not a relationship with someone, just a man) that i didn't even want to continue talking. The women aren't so direct, but it becomes evident quickly when women have such intentions.

I know the women have it worse, but it's a sad reality of this site and it won't change. No matter what posts you put up, what messages you put in your box. You just have to deal with it or not be here. Which isn't fair, but it's how things are.
 
I pretty much gave up on the whole dating scene ages ago and missed it IRL to begin with.

I don't know too many guys who PM just to pickup dates unless they are trolling or perverts.

That being said I wish they're were more Pen-Pal-ish people on the site.
In the event there ever was going to be a relationship I don't really care what you look like as much as I do your values. Sharing PII (Personally Identifiable Information [InfoSec]) should be done cautiously. You never know who's on the other end (unless your the NSA)...
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We do need more people to stick to the Bible and get a personal relationship with Christ. A girl's heart should be so lost in God, a guy must seek Him to find her.
Also being modest and watching good entertainment will affect that considerably.

Well, that's my two-cents... :D
 
You went from being the "undatable one" to "the one!" :cool:

There are still some good men out there. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders. Hang in there.