So back in the year 2002 I left my now husband with my two daughters the youngest one being his child as well.. We went to a shelter for woman then went on to North Carolina. In North Carolina I was going to settle down and start over with my girls. Two things happened though. one i has no way to start over there as the public services system would only pay for me to get an apartment and that was it then I was on my own. Even being a battered woman. This to me was awful and terrifying. They said I had to find work right away and take over my bills. I had no problem with doing that eventually but I was in a new state had no vehicle and knew no one except my sister who already worked full time. The second thing that went wrong was I missed my husband I was not emotionally ready for my departure at that time like I thought I was.. So I decided that due to the fact that I could not start over In North Carolina very easy I just would come back home to my husband. When I returned home MY mother had court papers to take custody of my girls from me she said it would be temp. situation until I got back on my feet. Well like a dummy I believed my mother after all she is my mom I did not feel like she would lie to me.. Well I got a place of my own away from my hubby but we still had contact.. I got a job and got back on my feet. I went to court to get my girls back then it all began the lies my mother said to be able to keep my kids away from me went flying.. Of course the judge believed her and I was refused custody of my kids. I sobbed for days and was so angry with her and the court.. I waited a bit longer and tried again I got a public defender who was worthless and went and tried again. MY public defender did not help me at all then my mother once again went on with her lies... I lost again this tore me to shreds inside.. I was slowly dying inside.. In the mean time I would go on visits and every time i would leave it would rip my heart out.. well i decided to go at it again thinking that if I told the judge some of the evil things that was going on at my moms house maybe he would see it was better for her to be back with me.. I told judge that my brother lived there and was smoking pot around my child ( truth) I also told the judge that the man my mother lived with could not even get custody of his own grandchildren because he molested his own daughter( Truth) that all back fired on me the judge actually said it has been over ten years he is not a danger anymore( honest to god truth he said that) I was beyond out of my mind crazy over him saying that.. SO once again I lost.. BY this time I had lost my mind as well I went into a deep depression and basically gave up on life for the most part. I could not have my kids and I knew if the court was going to allow my child to stay with a child molester that I was never going to get her back.. So I moved back in with my hubby and tried to go on with life.. I tried at least 4 more times to get her back each time i proved i was going to therapy and starting school and my life was back in order each time the same thing lose lose lose.. So i finally gave up. All this time i may add my mother is brain washing my child in to thinking I am the evil one so every time we go to court my child would say she did not want to leave and come home to me...which is another big reason why i kept loosing. Now here we are she is almost 17 and she has been coming for visits for over a year now and she stays for weeks at a time. She has realized that all this time I have tried and tried to get her back and that she was lied to about me and her dad this whole time.. It is sad that your own mother would do something like this to their child. I have forgiven my mother because with Gods Grace I can but I will never forget what she has done to me.. I will never agree with what she has done to me but I will not harbor hate as It is unhealthy for me.. So thank God even after all she did I was able to have the strength to forgive her. Now I am here and once again my child is crying out to me to get her free from where she is so I will go and try again. Please dear Lord help me get her home once and for all and get her the therapy she needs to take care of her anger and depression and such.. thank you lord
