My thoughts

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Chris19

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God wants everyone to suffer.

He wants you to kill yourself.

Things he took away from me.

1. Hopes and dreams
2. Friends
3. Personal Life
4. My identity
5. Ability to feel comfortable
6. Looking forward to the future
7. My ability to talk to girls
8. Time

Things he gave me

1. Hate, Despair, Suffering, Anger, Sadness
2. Not my prayers
3. Alcoholism
4. Addiction
5. Confussion
6. Suicidal Thoughts
7. Regreting my very birth
8. My ability to say things I don't mean to my family.


I've given up on asking for happiness, And Hopefully he'll answer my prayers about death, Cause I can't do it myself.

I'll take anything. Cancer, Car accident, Getting shot/stabbed. It doesn't matter to me, As long as i'm taken out of this curse of being a human.


I really don't care if I go to hell either. I know heaven and hell are real, And I know that both are way better than earth.

Suffering is so pointless, Why would god allow it? If he really truly cared about us, He would make sure that our ONE and ONLY life is ok.

Only bad things happen in the world, Nothing ever good.

If somebody would like to pray that god just ends it for me and that my family who I love very much would be able to get through it, That would be greatly appreciated. I didn't ask to be brought into this world.
 
Actually no im not going to pray what your asking nor am i going to judge you for how your feeling..
If i felt like that or beleived that that was the kind of person God is i wouldnt have much faith in God either..

God didnt take those this away from you and give you all those things, those arnt from God...

i just want to pray right now, that God will Give you hope for dispaair ,love insteasd of hate and bring healing, beuaty for ahes, , God has put hopes and dreams in you he knew you before you were born, you are unique and fearfully and wonderfully made even though you dont feel that because you listened to people instead of God , he loves you more than you realise and says he knows the plans he has for you not to harm you but to prosper you and give you a hooe and a future, confusion does not come from God, non of those things you say God has given you comes from him...

Can i humbly suggest a christian rehab programe like teen challange which will not only clean you up from the alcohol but will help you realise how much God loves you, who he created you to be and also the root causes of your addiction, anger, self hatred...

Theres also an online website called settingcaptivesfree.com

I dont have all the amswers, but i hear your pain, and have expereinced some of the emotions your feeling..but the one thing i have clung onto is God and faith , dont give up on God because he is a God who reaches down into pain and despair and wil turn things around, and use your testemony to help others...




Chris19 said:
God wants everyone to suffer.

He wants you to kill yourself.

Things he took away from me.

1. Hopes and dreams
2. Friends
3. Personal Life
4. My identity
5. Ability to feel comfortable
6. Looking forward to the future
7. My ability to talk to girls
8. Time

Things he gave me

1. Hate, Despair, Suffering, Anger, Sadness
2. Not my prayers
3. Alcoholism
4. Addiction
5. Confussion
6. Suicidal Thoughts
7. Regreting my very birth
8. My ability to say things I don't mean to my family.


I've given up on asking for happiness, And Hopefully he'll answer my prayers about death, Cause I can't do it myself.

I'll take anything. Cancer, Car accident, Getting shot/stabbed. It doesn't matter to me, As long as i'm taken out of this curse of being a human.


I really don't care if I go to hell either. I know heaven and hell are real, And I know that both are way better than earth.

Suffering is so pointless, Why would god allow it? If he really truly cared about us, He would make sure that our ONE and ONLY life is ok.

Only bad things happen in the world, Nothing ever good.

If somebody would like to pray that god just ends it for me and that my family who I love very much would be able to get through it, That would be greatly appreciated. I didn't ask to be brought into this world.
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Chris,
I'm very sorry to hear that you're feeling like that.
The truth is that God doesn't owe us anything. If we got we deserved we'd all be burning in hell. We don't deserve anything good. We are entitled to nothing. Therefore, every good thing we do receive should be counted as a blessing.
I understand you're going through some tough times. I have and do go through them too. We all do. Jesus himself suffered immensely, and far greater than we ever will. He did that for our sake. Whatever we suffer can't compare to that.
You say you wouldn't mind going to Hell. I honestly know you don't quite know what you're asking for there. However bad your life on Earth seems right now, Hell is far far far worse I'm sure. There is not even a comparison.
Remember, life on Earth is short. It's just a vapor as one scripture says. Eternity is forever. Being with God is going to be amazing. No hurt, no pain, no dissapointment, etc. and that is FOREVER.

Sometimes we have to make a choice how to see our life. I can say I've felt like I've hated my life before. I can say I also decided I needed to wake up and realize that life is what we make it sometimes. Yes, there will absolutely be bad things that will happen until the day we die. However, there are good things there too. We can choose to wallow in self pity or pick ourselves up and walk on, keep trying. Try to see the good in life..even though sometimes it doesn't seem there is much there.
I have a bit of a challenge for you. Look for ways to help other people. It doesn't have to be big things, even just small things. Find ways to make even the smallest difference in someone else's life. I know this might not make sense right now, and you might not see how it could possibly help your life be better...if you go through with this, you will see though. You don't have anything to lose. Try it.

I hope and pray you will cry out to God. Seek Him. He can handle your questions, etc. Just try to remember he IS God though. Check out Job chapter 38 and on. Actually, that whole book is a great read.

I'm sure you're going to get a lot of advice, suggestions, etc. in this thread. It's up to you if you listen and try anything suggested or not. Don't give up. Life is hard work but you can find some enjoyment in it.
 
niceguy and princess bella:) sooo nice. see Chris19 how u are loved :) there are no better hands to be in!
 
Hey Chris, hmm hard times can be tough, but the bible says in 1 Peter that cast all your cares and burdens on Him for He cares for you. You have been carrying those burdens of sadness and grief around for too long... Jesus said in this world you shall have many trails and tribulations, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. Well you can carry those burdens or choose to give them away... I know part of your pain... I have experienced that... But it is up to you to stand up and rebuke all burdens and pain and give them all to God and ask Him to have His way in you... Or you can continue in the pain... CHRIST CAME TO GIVE YOU LIFE IN ABUNDANCE!!
 
Dear Chris,

I, too, am sorry that you are feeling the way you are, but I need to correct one thing that you said. God did not give you the things you described in your post. I know this because God is not evil. He is a loving, merciful God who wants the best for all his children. The evidence for this in Scripture is overwhelming. He does allow bad things to happen, but he does not initiate them.

So, if you have reached the point in your life where you need to blame someone (beside yourself) for your troubles, you will have to keep looking. God is not to blame! However, you can be assured that, although you have abandoned Him, He has not abandoned you. He loves you unconditionally, and He stands ready to help you survive whatever you are going through, if you would only sincerely ask Him.

God be with you in your struggles.
 
Chris19 said:
God wants everyone to suffer.

I really don't care if I go to hell either. I know heaven and hell are real, And I know that both are way better than earth.

Edit: Hell is worse than earth, and there is more suffering there than what you are facing on Earth. And sorry, i'm sure there is nobody here who will join you in your prayers to die :)

Anyways, i don't know what you're going through,but it's not a new thing (Ecc1:10). Job went through worse, but he stuck with God throughout!.Just think about it this way, Maybe God allows these things because He trusts you to overcome it just like it was with the case of Job :)

Don't give up brother, God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that you can ever ask or think :)
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Hey, I used to feel the same way about life. You have to stop thinking of God as some kind of Genie. He is amazing, but you can't just give him a shopping list of things that you want. I have a lot of horrible things happening to me in my life, but I am coming to realize that without the pain, God could not give me relief. God is granting me my prayers, however he is changing me to what I need to be in order to deserve what I want. Actually now, I am realizing that God is making all of the bad things in my life have really good side effects, good enough to make me thankful for the pain. God loves you, stop trying to convince yourself that he doesn't.
 
Chris19 said:
God wants everyone to suffer.

He wants you to kill yourself.

Things he took away from me.

1. Hopes and dreams
2. Friends
3. Personal Life
4. My identity
5. Ability to feel comfortable
6. Looking forward to the future
7. My ability to talk to girls
8. Time

Things he gave me

1. Hate, Despair, Suffering, Anger, Sadness
2. Not my prayers
3. Alcoholism
4. Addiction
5. Confussion
6. Suicidal Thoughts
7. Regreting my very birth
8. My ability to say things I don't mean to my family.


I've given up on asking for happiness, And Hopefully he'll answer my prayers about death, Cause I can't do it myself.

I'll take anything. Cancer, Car accident, Getting shot/stabbed. It doesn't matter to me, As long as i'm taken out of this curse of being a human.


I really don't care if I go to hell either. I know heaven and hell are real, And I know that both are way better than earth.

Suffering is so pointless, Why would god allow it? If he really truly cared about us, He would make sure that our ONE and ONLY life is ok.

Only bad things happen in the world, Nothing ever good.

If somebody would like to pray that god just ends it for me and that my family who I love very much would be able to get through it, That would be greatly appreciated. I didn't ask to be brought into this world.
Click to expand...
How do you know it wasn't the devil?
 
God did not do this....Satan is the one that is attacking you. And I must say he's doing a very good job.

Don't let him win! You must fight him, but you can't do it alone. He's stronger than you are as you've already seen.

You MUST,MUST,MUST use the tools that God has given you to fight him. The only way to defeat the devil is by the blood of the lamb. You don't have that so DO NOT engage Satan until you have the Lord going before you.

Immerse yourself in the Word, pray for the Holy Spirit to intervene for you. Seek help from mature Christians.

DO NOT succumb ...be brave and determined.

Do you think you need counseling also? Please go find spiritual and mental help!!
 
Chris19 said:
Life is completely pointless if you are not happy.
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Define happy.

This isn't just unhappiness; this is total despair; which creeps in when hope is slowly destroyed.

There is HOPE....the only real hope is salvation through Jesus Christ. Satan is trying to destroy you with despair.

True happiness is achieved when we align ourselves with the love and will of our Heavenly Father. Until we do that, we can never be really happy.

There is One who is more than willing and ready to pull you out of the pit. You just have to put your arm up and take His hand. I'll be praying that you do that :)
 
Bruce500 said:
Hey, I used to feel the same way about life. You have to stop thinking of God as some kind of Genie. He is amazing, but you can't just give him a shopping list of things that you want. I have a lot of horrible things happening to me in my life, but I am coming to realize that without the pain, God could not give me relief. God is granting me my prayers, however he is changing me to what I need to be in order to deserve what I want. Actually now, I am realizing that God is making all of the bad things in my life have really good side effects, good enough to make me thankful for the pain. God loves you, stop trying to convince yourself that he doesn't.
Click to expand...


Wow, are you sure you're only 14? :)

I'd love to hear you testimony sometime!
 
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