Need Financial Blessings

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KDiamond

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Please pray for me. I am suffering depression that I have never experienced before because I am so disgusted by myself. I've always felt I have a very close relationship with The Lord he has always heard my prayers and never neglected me. I love The Lord very much and I am grateful for his blessings. Though lately I feel the devil is fighting harder to deceive me and prey on my desires. For the past year I have been praying for financial stability the toll of not being able to sustain financially has been over bearing for my husband who I married less then a year ago. He is not saved but says he believes in God but lacks any spiritual commitment. Lack of money stressed him out so much that he can't see the blessings God has giving us. I prayed for years that he would give his heart to The Lord but to no avail. I have constantly reassured him that God will take care of our financial needs. I have never really stressed about money or really prayed for money until I saw how the lack of it effects him. For the past year I have started praying for finances mostly in the hope of making him a believer. Well God is so good and merciful that he has always provided and I know he hears my prayer but the devil has been listening to my desires as well. Lately the devil has been tempting me to try alternative methods for getting money. Some how I came across a gambling website. I was a little hesitant at first but I was feeling compelled because of my earthly desires. I lost and I lost it made me depressed so much that I started drinking and occasionally having a cigarette. I still prayed constantly but didn't feel like God was pleased with me at all. Then one day I tried my luck and won. I won big $60,000. I was so overwhelmed and thankful my prayers has been answered I instantly changed my life around I spent every moment giving thanks and stopped doing anything that I felt might be unpleasing to God. I felt so close to God I wanted to eat sleep and breath God every second of the day. I told my husband and he was still a little resistant but was considering being more open to giving God a chance. I had so much hope and my future looked clear for me my husband and my son. Then something happened I don't know why it did it was my worst nightmare. I still don't know how this is possible but the devil got in my ear. He told me to keep playing and I'll win more. I followed everything else God was telling me but why didn't I hear him say stop gambling. I'm so stupid! I still can't explain the relentless urge that came over me to keep playing. In less then an hour I lost everything, Everything! I still feel like God is with me I am so close to him right now I can't stop telling people how good he is but I am so hurt and broken I want to just punch myself. I kept apologising to God for destroying his blessing. Ive been in a deep depression ever since. I have to go to the bathroom at work to pray several times a day because I need strength. The other day after praying in the bathroom and begging for forgiveness and for him to please reconsider blessing me again, he spoke to me and said 'that wasn't from me'. Then I realised it was the devil he was the one who dangled money in front of me he's the reason I find myself so destroyed. I understand now but I'm still very depressed. I haven't told my husband I lost the money. I have stayed in prayer but I have never sunk to such a low depression. I need help I don't know how we're going to get by now. I'm to embarrassed to talk to anyone about my situation and I feel like a failure. I'm just praying for help and strength I feel so alone and miserable I don't know what to do. I hope that some how some way my finances will increase I learned a valuable lesson never ever even consider gambling again but how do I overcome the desire to have money that I am truly in need of?

With love and blessings,
 
Dear KDiamond. Let me start by saying that God loves you . He knows the impulses and the fervency by which your spirit operates . Its what makes you unique . Your desire is for quick victory and believe it or not , God put that in you . And why not? Why shouldnt Christians want a decisive victory , and for the battle to be over , even before it has begun? This is of God . But we also have a responsibility as believers , to ' Renew our minds ' with the Word of God . Gods Word says that , ' He shall supply , All of our needs , according to His riches in Glory , by Christ Jesus ' . You cry , and you hurt , and you stress to the point of breakdown. Believe me I know , because I have been there . I am at this point in my life , working through similar situations with My finances , it's rough , and it hurts , and at times it's hard to see clearly in the middle of the storm , just how God is going to work it all out. But believe me when I say , that God is Faithful . He is Faithful to Save , He is Faithful to Deliver , He is Faithful to Restore . Father we come before you in the name of Jesus . Lord we lift up every situation where the enemy has a stronghold in Diamonds life . Knowing that the weapons that you have given us are Not carnal , but they are mighty to the pulling down of stronghold , casting down imaginations , and for every high thing that exalts itself against Your knowledge Father . Lord we come against that degradating spirit that tries to convince her that she is less than she is . She is a child of Royalty Dear God , an inheritor of your Kingdoms Best . Bless their finances Lord , give them seed to sow into your kingdom , Bless them , Increase them , in Jesus name , Amen
 
I'll be praying. :)

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:25-34

 
You, your husband and all you need are in my prayers in Jesus's name.
In every cirrcomstance give praise and thanksgiving given to God, for this is the path to the peace, contentment and joy you seek .

Hugs and God bless
pickles
 
Thank you so much for your words and prayers. I feel my spirit being gradually uplifted;
yet a part of me is still in search of a solution. I pray The Lord will bless you and keep you safe.
 
Guilt is a heavy load to carry....and failure to resist temptations can really spiral into depression. Look at it as a lesson learned...you now know more about yourself than you did before. You've seen your weakness and that's a blessing. Take that blessing and let it lead you to the throne. Be honest about everything, especially to your husband. Hiding things is the devil's best weapon.

Praying for you....strength, wisdom, and self-control. God really will give you these if you ask for them :)
 
Ouch! Well that wasn't from the Lord so if I was you I would not stress so much about something that wasnt from him to begin with so its not His plan for you. Gambling is against what the Lord wants from us. Anytime I have ever even thought about doing it the Holy Spirit said NO, firmly. And honestly what I think on money is that we don't get a lot of it because the Lord wants us to depend on Him for all of our needs. I remember getting soooooooo stressed out over something to where I was in a tizzy of nerves like you are right now. I was having a hard time completely trusting the Lord. He kept putting the thought into my mind "I got this, relax" and I learned sure enough that he indeed did have my situation completely under control. That is the lesson that taught me that worry is silly because we have a BIG GOD and his love for us is BIG.
You are prolly going to get in trouble with your fiance but you know what the Lord has a plan for him also. If anything does go wrong and he leaves you ever for whatever reason I strongly strongly strongly urge you to not date a man that isnt saved. It is a hard hard hard hard road to walk. I walk it and I know it intimately. When you start to freak out, just whisper up that I trust you Lord and ask the Lord to put a hedge of protection around you. I pray and I lift you up to the Lord asking that He fill you with His peace and his assurance that he does indeed have your life in His hands and that He helps your faith grow stronger in Him, I pray and ask that He helps you with all that you need I ask on Jesus name, amen.
 
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