NEED HELP GOD TOLD ME TO DATE SOMEONE

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Gerfy1

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I was praying one very late night (around 3 in the morning) and i was wondering who I should date. I have never asked someone out. I prayed ,"please help me with my dating problem. When I wake up i will flip a coin twice. If it lands on heads twice, i should date (person1). If it lands on tails twice, i should date (person2). If it lands on heads, and then tails, then i should date (person3). If it is tails twice, then i should date no one. I woke up that morning and flipped the coin. Tails. Tails. I concluded that god wanted me to date no one. I am not certain that this is the best path for me. How can I get god to confirm that this is what he wants?

P.S. I am 14 years old
 
Stop flipping coins and go ask her if she'll hang out with you for a while. Then ask the other one, and the third one. (Forget the dating until you get to know them better as friends.) You'll find God's will a lot quicker if you get out among people, the way Jesus did.
 
Gerfy1 said:
I was praying one very late night (around 3 in the morning) and i was wondering who I should date. I have never asked someone out. I prayed ,"please help me with my dating problem. When I wake up i will flip a coin twice. If it lands on heads twice, i should date (person1). If it lands on tails twice, i should date (person2). If it lands on heads, and then tails, then i should date (person3). If it is tails twice, then i should date no one. I woke up that morning and flipped the coin. Tails. Tails. I concluded that god wanted me to date no one. I am not certain that this is the best path for me. How can I get god to confirm that this is what he wants?

P.S. I am 14 years old
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You don't need to flip a coin, and you can't demand/expect God to speak to you that way.

All you need is common sense and the Bible (which is God's primary way of speaking to us).

Don't be conformed to this world, but instead be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12).

So don't conform to the teens around you. Be different. Be proud that you are reserving yourself for marriage. Not just reserving your private part, but your heart and emotions as well.

Dare to be different. Not for the sake of being different, but for Jesus.

Have fellowship with godly teenagers, male and female. Forget dating.

Then maybe when you're ready to marry (many years from now), you can court a girl who has also reserved herself (physically and emotionally) for her future husband instead of following the teen crowd.
 
How to i get to know someone without seeming like you are flirting with them
 
Youth group activities are a good way of getting to know people. You don't have to have one on one time to get to know someone. Plus being in a group relieves any pressure of feeling like your being flirtatious, and takes the burden of you of having to keep the conversation going.
 
Honestly, when you said that you have never dated anyone yet, I thought you were at least in your mid-twenties. And, then I read that you're just 14. Come on man, 14 is the age where you get out, play basketball, football, soccer, get good grades and have good platonic relationships. And above all, a time where you can start focusing on building your relationship with God, because now you can definitely understand the Bible better, and therefore understand God better.

According to me, 14 is way too young to date girls, because there's a high chance that the relationship is not going to last until marriage. And believe me, I never even thought of marriage when I was 14. Even if you get into a relationship now, it's going to be extremely hard to keep it up, especially when you guys may probably go to different colleges, choose different career paths, and probably land up in different countries. You need to be with someone you truly love. And, the fact that you can't decide between three girls, shows that you don't love either, and that you're just doing it for the ''coolness'' of dating and being in a relationship.

Gerfy, being single is fun. You can concentrate on yourself more, and grow in different areas in your life. So, don't go around flipping coins. We're not Gideons to be testing God for answers. And a coin is definitely not a sheep fleece. Just enjoy your life. Girls can be a headache, trust me. =P You're too young to be dealing with them.
 
I dont believe a man mature enough to date would flip coins to make a decision. Not sure how God got mixed into flipping coins. If you dont know how God works, He's probably already answered what you want to know with a NO! God can and does say NO!
You are only 14, enjoy life, friends, dont drink, do drugs, go to a church that stands firmly on Spirit and Truth. Finish getting an education, which if includes college could take several years. Try to stay a normal teen. You're not ready for a relationship, for you are not old enough, well mature enough to even think about it.
 
Be careful that you're not creating superstitions for yourself with the coin flipping thing.

As for dating, I think 14 is a good age to start making awkward relationship mistakes. You will learn from it now and it will pay off for when you are older. :) Go with the girl you are most interested in. But try and get to know her as a friend first. Take this time to begin learning the emotional needs of the opposite gender on a basic level. If you pay attention now and gain those skills, girls will be fighting over you by the time you're 20. :p
 
Thanks for all of the help! One more question though. How do i know what god wants me to do?
 
Gerfy1 said:
Thanks for all of the help! One more question though. How do i know what god wants me to do?
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I know this sounds like a cliche, but listen to your heart. The pure part of your heart. :) The answer will only come to you when you aren't trying to hear it with your mind.
 
Relena7 said:
I know this sounds like a cliche, but listen to your heart. The pure part of your heart. :) The answer will only come to you when you aren't trying to hear it with your mind.
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There is no "pure part" of our hearts. Jeremiah 17:9, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?"

How do you know what God wants you to do? Do you mean in general or in the realm of dating?

As a side note, would you want someone to date you because they flipped a coin and it happened to be you? I want to be dated because someone likes me and wants to pursue me for a godly relationship for the purpose of marriage potential. Not because Mr. Lincoln told them to. ;)
 
Gerfy1 said:
Thanks for all of the help! One more question though. How do i know what god wants me to do?
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Pray and read your bible. Don't get so wrapped up and worried about whether or not you will hear God, and just pray, read, and chill out knowing that an answer will come when you need it.
 
rachelsedge said:
There is no "pure part" of our hearts. Jeremiah 17:9, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?"
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Well what do you call it then? If a tiny piece of God lives in all of us, then I only assumed it is in the heart?
 
Mat 6:33, Seek ye Gods kingdom and its righteousness. and everything else will be added unto you.

Seek GOD first man, before anything or anyone ellse
 
Gerfy1 said:
Thanks for all of the help! One more question though. How do i know what god wants me to do?
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There are at least two relevant things God wants of every teenage young man: 1. Find out who you are in Christ. 2. Have friends of both sexes, including girls. You need the first, so you will be able to love and help create something new in the kingdom of God through that love (in marriage, in a career, in friendships, or whatever way). You need the second, so you will know who you should marry, or, if you choose not to marry, to know what you are deciding to give up. These two things start now, and that's why you feel God calling you to do something. Dating, marriage, or not, will come in God's timing.
 
Personally i suggest you avoid dating at your age. The purpose of dating if to find a spouse. It is very very rare to date someone at your age and end up marrying them in the long run.
All dating will do is set your teen years up for a series of broken hearts, and distractions from your faith and school. By the time you are old enough to seriously consider looking for someone you will have years of hurt and frustration over all the breakups you have to endure and take that junk into future relationships.
Also, most teens are not mature, or knowledgeable enough to truly know how to conduct themselves in a relationship.
Finally, it is my belief God would not direct someone your age into a relationship.
 
Gerfy1 said:
I was praying one very late night (around 3 in the morning) and i was wondering who I should date. I have never asked someone out. I prayed ,"please help me with my dating problem. When I wake up i will flip a coin twice. If it lands on heads twice, i should date (person1). If it lands on tails twice, i should date (person2). If it lands on heads, and then tails, then i should date (person3). If it is tails twice, then i should date no one. I woke up that morning and flipped the coin. Tails. Tails. I concluded that god wanted me to date no one. I am not certain that this is the best path for me. How can I get god to confirm that this is what he wants?

P.S. I am 14 years old
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Gerfy, you are putting way too much pressure on yourself. :) If you think not knowing WHEN or WHO to date is rough, wait until you see how much trouble dating is. :) To the world dating is just a game. For those who love the Lord, it is a process we go through as we attempt to learn about a potential spouse.
When a christian tries to "date" the worldly way, the results are all too often harmful, as dating at the age of 14 is only going to lead to a lot of sexual temptation/frustration and broken hearts. God wants better for you, Gerfy, and so do we, as your sibs in Christ. :)
Listen to the wisdom of your elders in this and you will save yourself so much pain. Wait. Be friends with girls for now.
If God isn't showing you who you should be dating, it's likely because He doesn't want you dating anyone right now. :) Sometimes God IS answering and we just don't like the answer. :)
 
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