You poor thing, have you got a youth leader or someone at your church you can talk to, share with?
What about your parents? You know that in this horrible time you're going through the best friend you have is JESUS you can tell HIM anything you want He will listen not judge and comfort you He will never Leave you and He loves you so much.. I know you can probably do with a hug. and i hope you have lots of friends and family around you at this time for support and to give you that much needed hug.
God Bless you and may He fill you with His LOVE and PEACE.