Need some advice is possible

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Oct 10, 2021
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#21
There's no excuse for what your husband is doing. Since you go to a church, ask the pastor (or preferably two or more pastors and/or elders) to come to your home and confront your husband about this. You need two or three witnesses when the matter is discussed. If he refuses to get spiritual counseling or give up his addiction, then you may have to walk away from this man, and take your children with you. Technically this is adultery. And you may have to talk to a lawyer about how this should be handled. But take it a step at a time.
I don't think pastors are elders qualify in this area, this guy needs professional help from a more qualified individual
 
G

Godsgirl83

Guest
#22
Exactly, that's what I thought. In Marriage vows couples say "till death do us apart". Those are very strong words. I'm not even married yet and I cannot believe how they say, "lets divorce" so easily.
All I know is a few years ago I stumbled upon my husbands porn problem and it about tore the life from me.
I reacted as most women react, which only caused more division and strife between us.
I had enough "advice" telling me to just leave him over this.
But I knew Holy Spirit was telling me "NO!"
I won't go into all the details here, but it definitely required dying to myself (to my own flesh) and yielding to Holy Spirit's leading.
One thing I CLEARLY remember Holy Spirit telling me was that I could yell and scream all I wanted about the situation but all it would do is close him (husband) up more. That He (Holy Spirit) is the only One that can reach the deepest, most private, inner being of a man's heart and touch/change it.
It wasn't easy, in fact, at times it, well I can't even describe how heart wrenching it was at times.................
What I can say though is that it has been a few years now, and God has restored our marriage.
I know that there are still things that show up here and there (tv, out in public) that catch his attention, but I also see how he quickly redirects his attention or quietly begins to pray.
God is faithful!
 

Jesus_Leads

Active member
Aug 15, 2021
264
89
28
#23
All I know is a few years ago I stumbled upon my husbands porn problem and it about tore the life from me.
I reacted as most women react, which only caused more division and strife between us.
I had enough "advice" telling me to just leave him over this.
But I knew Holy Spirit was telling me "NO!"
I won't go into all the details here, but it definitely required dying to myself (to my own flesh) and yielding to Holy Spirit's leading.
One thing I CLEARLY remember Holy Spirit telling me was that I could yell and scream all I wanted about the situation but all it would do is close him (husband) up more. That He (Holy Spirit) is the only One that can reach the deepest, most private, inner being of a man's heart and touch/change it.
It wasn't easy, in fact, at times it, well I can't even describe how heart wrenching it was at times.................
What I can say though is that it has been a few years now, and God has restored our marriage.
I know that there are still things that show up here and there (tv, out in public) that catch his attention, but I also see how he quickly redirects his attention or quietly begins to pray.
God is faithful!
Amen our heavenly father is always faithful. That's a great testimony right there ms. Julson. Let holy spirit fight for you.
 

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
26,074
13,774
113
#24
I don't think pastors are elders qualify in this area, this guy needs professional help from a more qualified individual
This is a spiritual issue. It needs spiritual counsel.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#25
Your husband needs deliverance so I would seek that...ask at your church
just talking about it wont help (or nagging for that matter) but breaking the bonds and telling the demons to get lost will.

Also consider fasting and praying from an elder, or preferably, an elder couple so that you are both protected.
 

Aidan1

Well-known member
Mar 17, 2021
1,680
705
113
#26
He claims that he is. We go to church and he get saved again. We’ve been thru marriage counseling and renewed our vows last year.
It seems that he cant come out of it alone. Its an addiction in one Hand and he must will leave it on the other hand.
I know it is hard for Him. But you should confront Him. He's shame will be big, but there is no other way. Or you still accept it.
To leave him I see not as an opinion. But he must know that you are suffering about this situation. And going to loose your trust in Him.
I pray that the Lord help you to do the right and that your husband will come free from this addiction.