One Last Cry

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AzureAfire

AzureAfire

Senior Member
Apr 16, 2013
490
22
18
I never thought i'd be posting something like this here...

I'm crying my last cry. For that man who broke my heart. The man i loved.

I am just so ecstatic about my spiritual life now, and what GOD has been doing and revealing in my life. HE is simply BEYOND AWESOME :) i can't stop saying that at all, 'coz it's true!!!

But...i never expected i'd be crying like this today.

I don't know what got into me...why i even bothered to check out his facebook profile. I thought i was 100% over him...no longer affected nor thinking of him. I guess i wanted to know how he was.

Then i saw that he had gone away. He's in the US now. Pennsylvania.

I guess i was shocked to know he was so far away now...

No part of me wants us to get back together. I knew from the start that what we had wasn't meant to be. That it's only right that it ended at last. But suddenly, the memories come rushing in...how we were. I knew he loved me, and i did too...there was so much sweetness and warmth there, inspite of all the hurts. I'm surprised to know that i love him still...although not as romantically as before. I still care for him so much, after all...i still wish for him all the best. I still long for his salvation.

Crying like crazy now...asking for healing for this. GOD is more than enough for me. I know i can get through this. I know i can start anew. Just this one last cry as i let it all go at last...every memory. All in GOD's hands.

Please pray for me, brethren...
 
"God of our life, there are days when the burdens we carry chafe our shoulders and weigh us down; when the road seems dreary and endless, the skies gray and threatening; when our lives have no music in them, and our hearts are lonely, and our souls have lost their courage. Flood the path with light, run our eyes to where the skies are full of promise; tune our hearts to brave music; give us the sense of comradeship with heroes and saints of every age; and so quicken our spirits that we may be able to encourage the souls of all who journey with us on the road of life, to Your honor and glory."

Hoping you find peace at this moment!
 
You know I think you are a sparkley little rainbow of awesomeness Azure & you know I've told you how much I see the love you have for the Lord in you,as I know other's see the same exact things in you. There's no shame in having a good cry over that relationship..it was a huge part of your life,but you know that God & his relationship with you is vastly greater & far more intimate than anything. I pray that the Lord continues to strengthen you in each step you take,that your heart is filled with his love & power so greatly that there is room for nothing else. ((hugssss))) my sister. I will keep you in prayer. :)
 
I can't believe it's been 6 hours since i posted whilst crying incessantly XD

I've calmed down now. It didn't take super long for me to be at peace again, praise GOD!! :) so much has changed in me because of HIM.

Unlike before, months ago...when the wounds were fresh. Being spiritually dead then, whenever i cried, it was like crying for someone who died...clutching at all that was left of our so-called love with clenched and trembling fingers. Wailing deep in my soul...to no effect. The pain never wavered then...i just got tired of crying, leading to sleep. Then another day of pain starts anew.

Now, i feel truly that GOD is in this with me. Watching over me, soothing me as i cried the last tears leading to goodbye. I've always hated goodbyes...but this one goodbye, i welcome with gratefulness and peace in my heart. GOD has set me aright. This is the closure i never got. HE is so faithful and gracious to give this for me...in all things, GOD really thinks about us. I can't help but see HIS hand upon all things happening in my life now. My awe and love for HIM grows even deeper, and the praise from my heart continues to flow to HIM :) truer and sweeter still!!

To everyone who gave their support and prayers for me, THANK YOU!! :) for years, i never relied on others for anything. All my problems were mine and GOD's alone. I never knew the sweetness and warmth that the love of brethren can give, til i've come to know you all. I am more than grateful :) GOD bless your wonderful loving hearts!! May HE fill you all with joy, love, and peace to overflowing, in Christ Jesus our LORD!!! :D
 
Azure my friend . Everything's been beautifully spoken above..
only thing I have to share is .. when something familiar like that comes along .. I connect with God immediately .. I look at it from his perspective and relate how I feel to how God might feel when I do similar things Towards my relationship with Him .. This brings me out of captivity of any emotions trying to flood in.. I find this humbles me before God instead .. Giving him the authority instead of the emotions ..relating to Him intimately and deeply in my connection with Him ..
hugs friend .. God is our assurance .. He is sufficient
 
Romans 8:26-27 Sometmes there are no words to express our pain but the Spirit of God will intercede for us....with groanings that cannot be uttered
 
Glad you're feeling better. Looks like I got here too late! :D I'll just ask God to show you if there's anything left that you need to give to Him... but it sounds like it's all been taken care of. ♥
 
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