pls help

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adx

Guest
#1
#1
I'm attracted to a married man, I don't have intentions of dating him, I don't want any sexual relationship with but I am attracted to him and I enjoy his company, I make effort to be with him and get his attention and he's ok we r friends. I am single. What do I do? I am commiting sin and what can I do?
 
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riz_mahuzai

Guest
#2
#2
usually girls have the tendency to fall immediately,,,especially if the man has the qualities girls are looking for...
but the decision is in you...surrender your feelings to God because He is concerned of you...He knows how you feel towards the man you are attracted to,,
confess it,, then renew your mind with the word of God,, remember that he is already a married man,, don't fall into the trap of satan to commit adultery,,,
Renew your mind.. because everything starts from the mind,, whatever we think,,we do,, then we suffer from it,,,
right thinking results to right action,, right action results to right feelings or emotion...
if you have a close friend who is concerned of you,, tell it,,,
and,,, treat him as a brother without malice......allow the Holy spirit to help you overcome it...
 
resurrection33

resurrection33

Banned
#3
Dec 19, 2009
27,513
128
0
72
#3
adx said:
I'm attracted to a married man, I don't have intentions of dating him, I don't want any sexual relationship with but I am attracted to him and I enjoy his company, I make effort to be with him and get his attention and he's ok we r friends. I am single. What do I do? I am commiting sin and what can I do?
Click to expand...
I do not think you should spend time with him.
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#5
May 23, 2009
17,534
6,343
113
#5
I've been caught in this trap before, not in the sense of being attracted to someone married, but being attracted to guys who were all wrong for me (into drugs, emotionally and materially manipulative, etc.)

My best advice, from personal experience would be:

1. If you are serious about beating this, DO NOT spend time with him AT ALL. BREAK OFF ANY FRIENDSHIP IMMEDIATELY. Your mind will say, "Well, why can't we be friends?" But that's just simple self-deception and is PLAYING WITH FIRE. You have to ask yourself, how will you feel if your future husband has close, "female friends" someday, and consider that you need to be respectful to this man's wife as well.

2. Pray, of course, that God will help you get over this. But praying is not enough in this situation--you need to take action, no matter how drastic.

3. Fast--even if it's just for one meal a day, do something to get your flesh under spiritual discipline. In the past, I've been especially attached to a guy if I'm lonely, depressed, or angry, and I've found that fasting helps offset some of these emotions. Use the time you'd spend eating in pouring out your agony to God.

4. Spend time with family and friends OTHER than this person to help get your thoughts focused in another direction.

5. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART: ACTIVELY SEEK OUT ACCOUNTABILITY. Don't choose a friend who might be persuaded or sway in order to "see things from your point of view" or excuse your excuses to be with this man--because you'll find every excuse to be with him... "Well, we're going to pray together..." THIS IS A TRAP!!! Find an older Christian woman you trust who will HOLD YOU ACCOUNTABLE for your choices and keep you on the straight line.

Talk to your pastor or someone you trust and be open about your struggle--secrecy is one of the biggest breeding grounds for trouble!!! Get help, and keep asking until you get it. Don't accept the easy way out because otherwise, anyone who will be too lenient on your choices will allow you to follow the wrong direction!

I wish you the very best and believe me, I still struggle as well with sometimes being attracted to guys I should just stay away from. I thank God for the older, wiser Christian women I've been able to talk to in my life and still meet with one regularly so that she can hold me accountable as well.
 
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distinctiveministry

Banned
#6
Mar 2, 2010
537
3
0
#6
I'll third the motion to spend less or no time with him. Understand, we love the things we spend or time on, NOT "we spend our time on the things we love". Your time with him will only increase your feelings and entangle you in a deeper problem.
 
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adx

Guest
#7
#7
Thank you so much everyone, all your suggestions have helped and I promise to move on. I,ll stop spending time with him, I'll engage myself in spiritual exercise like fasting to put my flesh under check, I'll get someone whom I can be accountable to and I will be accountable to you all as well. Thank you all, you'll hear from a changed me soon.
 
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