*raises hand* I have a question...

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A helpless little girl??? In my mind that is all kinds of wrong....
 
*melt* Cheeky, my love, that is SO romantical! *sniffle* I'm having a Hallmark moment here. I knew you understood me. :X
 
If you can't kill bugs or change a light bulb how will you take care of kids. That is my outlook. Obviously if you are dating someone it is a person that you feel has potential o be your wife. I want more children one day. If we have a child I would be scared to leave them alone with her if she cant take care of herself. So for me I would say that the whole "helpless" routine is ridiculous and childish. If I am going to be with a woman she needs to act like a woman and not a spoiled child. :)
 
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Billy, that reminds me of a girl who dated my son for a VERY short time. She went on and on about how much she loooooooooooooved kids and wanted to be a mommy one day..blah, blah, blah, but she was obviously high maintenance. She was helping with VBS for a couple of days and one of the nursery kids had a runny nose, and instead of helping the poor little guy, she was like....ewwwwwwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. I was laughing and thinking..uh huh...yeah..YOU are mommy material! haha
 
Jullianna said:
Billy, that reminds me of a girl who dated my son for a VERY short time. She went on and on about how much she loooooooooooooved kids and wanted to be a mommy one day..blah, blah, blah, but she was obviously high maintenance. She was helping with VBS for a couple of days and one of the nursery kids had a runny nose, and instead of helping the poor little guy, she was like....ewwwwwwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. I was laughing and thinking..uh huh...yeah..YOU are mommy material! haha
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In Hawaii I helped run the nursery and organize who would come in and help each Sunday. I would always chuckle to myself when the young ladies would volunteer and then do or say something to the "eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww" effect. Haha I usually directed them to the greeters table. ;D
But yeah, I don't like being the damsel in distress. I've had to seriously swallow my pride and learn to ask for help, especially since having Kyla. When my car breaks down on the side of the road it's no longer just me who is affected. It should be a nice balance though. Changing a tire or checking my oil though? I got this. ;) haha
 
Catlynn, I had actually thought about you and the little boy you care for with the trach tube when I typed that. We never know what caring for children will bring, do we? We have to be prepared for anything. Being a mommy is a TOUGH job, isn't it? :)

I wish you well with Kyla's potty training btw and pray she is as easy as my son. I bought him training pants for Christmas and said, "Now you can't potty in the big boy pants Santa brought you, okay?" (Yep...we did Santa and he turned out to be a strong Christian anyway ;) ) He had one accident during the night, but never once pottied in them. :D Good luck! I think the key is to wait until they are ready and be patient. She is at a good age now to give it a shot. :)
 
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zeroturbulence said:
Then I guess its true... chivalry really is dead.
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I don't think it is, personally I didn't think this thread was really talking about chivalry so much as a woman either truly being incapable of performing minor everyday tasks, or simnply falttering a man's ego, both of which are not good.

I don't think it's a healthy thing for a woman in a relationship to be calling for help that she does not need just so her husband feels like a protector, it works of course, but it is deception, and so it's a situation where the ends don't justify the means, for me anyway.
In that situation it's not being a hero at all, or being chivalrous, it's just being partonised by a woman whose respect you should already have.

If she is genuinely incapable of doing something then again it's not chivalry, modern chivalry is just an act of courtesy, it's not doing something a person cannot do for themself. I'll gladly hold open the door but I'd find it a good deal more pathetic if a woman stood in fornt of one for not knowing how to open it herself, I wouldn't feel too heroic. :p
 
Chivalry isn't dead. You have to look at the real meaning of chivalry before making that statement. Treating a woman like a helpless baby does not describe chivalry.
 
BillyTheKid said:
If you can't kill bugs or change a light bulb how will you take care of kids. That is my outlook. Obviously if you are dating someone it is a person that you feel has potential o be your wife. I want more children one day. If we have a child I would be scared to leave them alone with her if she cant take care of herself. So for me I would say that the whole "helpless" routine is ridiculous and childish. If I am going to be with a woman she needs to act like a woman and not a spoiled child. :)
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I can, but wont kill a bug. Especially if it makes a crunching sound when you step on it! Made me cringe just typing that...
 
By chivalry I mean being a woman's knight in shining armor when she really needs someone's help. I don't know what everyone else's definition is.
 
I appreciate a guy being a gentleman. Having my man open a door for me or take my arm in his, take my hand or put his hand on the small of my back in a way that affectionately says to the world "this is my lady" is one of the most awesome feelings in the world. But when you find a guy who will not only let you know that he loves and respects you like that, but appreciates ALL that you are and doesn't want you to dumb yourself down or feign incapability, you have truly found the rarest of breeds. I want to be real with my man and vice versa. I want a guy who will challenge me to be ALL I can be, not less.

I would hate to think where I would be right now and how things would have gone for me and my son had my parents not raised me as they did, and had I not had the husband I had. And I can't imagine how difficult it would have been for him to go be with the Lord if he didn't know my strengths and that he could trust me to raise our son alone.

I hate those movies where the good guy is fighting the bad guy and the woman just stands there screaming and whimpering. I'm screaming at the tv at that point GET THE GUN DOOFUS!!!! I would think most guys would appreciate a little assist from time to time. :D
 
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Jullianna! You make my heart go all a flutter *swoon* ;)
Seriously though, I think the same thing. "It's just a gun lady, not the ebola virus. Laura Croft it up just a bit and you might get through this. Oh, and the screaming... it's not helping."
 
I was just typing in Kim's thread about divorce and something else occurred to me. TRUST is vital to a lasting relationship. A man who is not going to become a sniveling moron when I flutter my eyelashes at him is not likely to do that when another woman does the very same thing. Seems to me that a guy who expects me to feed his ego by pretending to be someone I am not is likely to move on to a woman who will the moment I find myself up to my elbows in caring for his home and children at some point and can't be the little darling he thought he married every moment of the day.
 
This reminds me of when I lived with two girls in Hawaii who were from Orange County, California. I was always the bug squisher. One time we came home late at night and our front door was fully opened. I was the one who went in first and searched the apartment, some form of weapon in hand (haha) and then let them know it was safe.
I agree completely with you, Jullianna. Opening a door or grabbing my arm is such an awesome thing....wanting me to feign helplessness....not so much. I was always the "If you can do it so can I!" person though. Haha
 
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